that-sleepless-bard

[that-sleepless-bard]

I had this dream a good while back and wanted to talk about it. I know it’ll likely get lost in the unending funnies & art that is Tumblr, and I kind of hope it is. It just helps to get my thoughts out in a public space.

I was some kind of feminine deity watching over the universe. I could see every facet of existence, but I was a part of it as well.

I don’t know how to describe it well, but this is the closest I can get: Existence was a house, and I was standing in the hall. Each open doorway lead to a different part of our universe, and each window showed the others parallel to ours.

I watched over my universe, guarding any star systems that bore life. I protected the Earth and countless other planets like it, each with their own ecosystems beyond description.

I redirected meteors, moved black holes, extended the lifetimes of stars, and positioned the planets a perfect distance from them so they could have the best of everything. The only thing I couldn’t protect life from was its own intelligence threatening to destroy itself, but I had long since come to terms with my inability to stop it, and continued protecting life in every way I could.

All the time, there was another deity, masculine, begging me to stop. He was worried about me. He tried to tell me that there was no point to my continued efforts, that someday they would face something I couldn’t save them from. But I kept trying. Because all I wanted was to see my beautiful planets thrive, and especially my precious life forms inhabiting them.

I knew I couldn’t keep my planets close forever. I knew that each life on them was finite. But I didn’t care. All I wanted was for them to live their best lives in the time they had. I saw Earth inhabitants, everyone that was doubting their own worth, everyone that had lost hope. I wished for nothing more than for them to be happy, but I was too far away to help.

I don’t know who needs to hear it, but if you’re reading this, never fall into the belief that nobody loves you or that nobody would care if you disappeared. I was never deeply involved with any spirituality, but this dream showed me in one of my darkest moments that somewhere, someone will notice, and somebody will miss you. You have worth. All life has worth. All life is loved. You are loved.

Again, I don’t mean for this to get overly deep or religious or something, I just haven’t been able to shake this dream for weeks now and wanted to talk about it.

Extra details:

- Individual parts of the universe were simultaneously 2D & 3D.

- I was seeing everything at the same time, but was focusing on individual parts.

- I saw my own human body among those on Earth that were feeling worthless.

- One of the intelligent species on another planet was a light blue color. It was unlike anything I’ve ever seen. It wasn’t any form of matter we’ve discovered, and despite being nearly twice the size of humans, it was a single body rather than a collection of cells. The best I can describe it is “giant amoeba”. Hell if I know how they were communicating, but they made no audible sound, but still understood each other as easily as we speak to others in our own language. Their planet had no liquid water nor oxygen, yet sustained alien plant life as well as these odd creatures. There were no children, yet there was clear distinction between the young & old.

#dreams #random #idk #weird dream #universe #existence #aliens #gods #astral projection? #extraplanar travel???? #i legit don’t know anymore #i don’t know what this was #never had a dream like this before #i don’t even know how to comprehend this

[that-sleepless-bard]

Thank you, Owl House

Thank you for…

Giving me a nonbinary character that’s loved, respected, and proud of who they are during a time when I felt alone after coming out.

Showing me a character with ADHD that struggled through school & childhood, but still came out successful.

Teaching me that I can stop waiting and choose myself.

Inspiring me to be better in all aspects of my life.

Giving me a hyperfocus that has lasted two years and will likely last for years to come.

Reminding me that my life is my own, and I can decide which doors to open and who I want with me on my journey.

Teaching me to only extend forgiveness as far as they’ll go to change.

Teaching me that family doesn’t only mean blood.

Thank you for finding me.

#the owl house #toh #raine whispers #toh raine #raine #toh eda #eda #edalyn clawthorne #toh spoilers #eda clawthorne #luz #luz noceda #king clawthorne #thank you #thank you for finding me

[that-sleepless-bard]

obligatory spoiler warning

100% this.

If I’m being honest, I started watching TOH for the LGBT+ representation, but I almost instantly fell in the love with the show for all of its other elements, & especially connected with Eda from episode 1.

To me, it looks like Eda has combined type ADHD.

Eda definitely shows she tends to be hyperactive, oftentimes moving around when she speaks & keeping herself busy with things such as cooking or potion brewing. It’s possible that when she was in school, she used Grudgby as a positive way of channeling her excess energy.

But we also see a lot of her internal symptoms, particularly her low attention span when she’s in an understimulating setting, as mentioned in the original post.

I can imagine that Faust’s strict way of running Hexside wasn’t helping her. Faust himself states that he bases his methods off the “insight into the minds of children” that Eda gives, & consequently, that would set his rules specifically against neurodivergent people. If that’s the type of system she grew up with, it’s no wonder she can’t stand traditional school.

There’s also the whole aspect of hyperfocus to consider. A lot of different things in her life could potentially be or have been hyperfocuses that stuck with her. The most obvious of these would be the card game Hexas Hold ‘Em. This was a textbook definition of hyperfocus, where it was the one thing she wanted to do, even when there were infinitely more important things to deal with, but she eventually drops it (at King’s insistance). In TTBK, she’s seemingly hyperfocused on doing tricks with her grudgby ball.

As far as school goes, I obviously can’t speak for Eda, but I can talk about the experience of undiagnosed ADHD in the learning environment, & make comparisons.

The biggest challenge for a primarily hyperactive/impulsive ADHD-er would be sitting still, primarily inattentives would have difficulty with… well, paying attention, & combined types, from what I’ve heard, get the worst of both worlds.

Eda has the secret passageways in the school, meaning when she’s in them, she never has to stay in one place for long. She can learn about multiple subjects at once & switch between them at will. This helps to keep things interesting, plus it appeals to her independence.

Many a time for someone with ADHD, regardless of presentation, sitting at a desk & copying from a board is the education equivalent of walking behind a slow person when you’re in a rush. You know you could be a block ahead by the time they’ve made half that distance, but you just can’t get around them.

We also know Eda is about as good at teaching one subject as she is at learning it. She has zero interest in showing Luz the basics of how magic works, but when they go to the Knee & she’s given all kinds of natural materials like snow & moss, she jumps back and forth between subjects just as she does when practicing magic.

Not to say she isn’t also impulsive like Luz. She has a habit of experimenting with fragments of information, which gets her into trouble. This brings us around to OP’s point that she’s a hands-on learner.

aaaand of course I’m running out of steam to talk about this. Anyone else, feel free to add on.

The ask I got about my ADHD Eda headcanon analysis got deleted, but I'm here to share it anyways.

Okay so. After Them's the Break Kid came out a lot of people started headcanoning Eda having ADHD and I actually REALLY like and agree with that headcanon. And not because

"Omg she got distracted by fire!!! 🤪"

But because of how we seen her when it comes to school. Now most fans assumed Eda hates studying and learning. Which is fair, since in I was a Teenage Abomination she made it clear she hates school.

HOWEVER, then you remember she literally made a hidden tunnel that can be used to listen to the different classes. Because remember, she WANTED to learn different types of magic.

A lot of her problems with school aren't because it involves learning, it's the school SYSTEM she has problem with.

And in the scene where Luz was teaching Eda and Lilith how to use glyphs, she was using a traditional teaching system with desks and everything. Lilith liked it but Eda did not.

This also led fans to believe that Lilith was just smarter and did better at studying.

But then in the opening of Them's the Break Kid we see the both of them studying. Lilith is using flashcards and assumes Eda is not paying attention because she's playing with her ball.

But it turns out Eda not only knows all the material but knows more than Lilith.

To ME this reads as Eda being a hands on learner, (and possibly even a form of stimming) she learns through action and movement and hates having to sit still to learn like how you're supposed to do in school. And when she's able to learn this way she's actually very smart.

That could also be the reason she acts out so much in school, especially if she already knows a lot of the material being taught.

In fact, this is actually kinda a parallel to Raine. With Raine they were introduced as being smart, and then in Them's the Breaks Kid we learn they are also very powerful with magic but are underestimated because they are a bard.

Meanwhile Eda was introduced as being the most powerful witch on the Boiling Isles. And THEN in Them's the Break Kid we learn she is ALSO very smart.

Which is also meant to be a surprise in universe by how Lilith reacted. She didn't expect Eda to be that knowledge on the subject, especially more that HER.

AND she gets distracted by fire. In conclusion, this girl is mentally ill but we already knew that.

#the owl house #toh #eda clawthorne #random

[that-sleepless-bard]

YES THIS IS PERFECT. THANK YOU RANDOM TUMBLR USER

Obligatory Spoiler Warning for The Owl House FtF

Please, I am begging anyone good at technology, photoshop a dollop of whipped cream onto Raine’s puppet hairstyle because the mental image has me w h e e z i n g

#raine whispers #whipped cream #i’m not sorry #random #the owl house #toh #toh raine #raine #toh spoilers #random thoughts

[that-sleepless-bard]

Obligatory Spoiler Warning for The Owl House FtF

Please, I am begging anyone good at technology, photoshop a dollop of whipped cream onto Raine’s puppet hairstyle because the mental image has me w h e e z i n g

#I’m not sorry #random #the owl house #toh #raine whispers #toh raine #raine #toh spoilers #random thoughts #spoilers

[that-sleepless-bard]

The thing where you see an object in the wrong place & immediately get distracted or have to do something else & you know the thing is there but because it’s not at the front of your mind you never do anything about it.

Petition to start calling that “Object dysrealization”

#idk just a random thought that occurred to me #help i’m having an existential crisis #it’s a better description than object permanence #what am i doing with my life for this to be my thought of the day #adhd #random #neurodiversity #neurodivergence #words #new word #idek #what am i doing with my life

[that-sleepless-bard]

You ever feel so much at once you end up not feeling at all?

#depression

[that-sleepless-bard]

tldr: I am the god of my own universe and characters I didn’t even consciously make continuously pray to me for answers to situations I have no context on.

Me: *trying to write*

Random character: *walks into my brain like she owns the place*

Random character: Can you fUCKING BELIEVE THIS-

Me: Uh-

Random character: THEY REALLY THOUGHT THEY COULD JUST WALTZ IN THERE LIKE NOBODY WOULD BE ALARMED BY TOTAL STRANGERS!

Me: …I know the feeling…

Random character: NOW THOSE IDIOTS ARE HURT AND I HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT.

Me: Okayokayokay. Pause. Rewind. Stop.

Me: Who the FUCK are you and how did you get into my house?! What are you talking about?!

Random character: *already walking out*

Me: *knocks over half my workspace getting up to follow her*

Me: WAIT YOU CAN’T JUST SPOUT THAT KIND OF INFORMATION AND LEAVE-

#like i dont even know these people #who are you #where did you come from #where did you go #where did you come from random ass hoe #i’m so tired #i just want to finish a project for once #writing #random #writer problems #character #funny #creative #story #based on true events

[that-sleepless-bard]

Passion for theatre (at least for me) is seeing everything behind the scenes, the hours of rehearsal, checking and re-checking that the tech is right, all of the hard work the cast & crew have put in for weeks to make this perfect for opening…

And still finding the result magical when you’re the one in the house.

#theatre #random #random thoughts #passion #hobby #love #theatre life

[that-sleepless-bard]

People in November: Well, it’s time! *inhales* BABY ALL I WANT FOR CHRI-

Me: *shoving my hand over their mouth* SHHH! Shh shhh shhhhhhhh! No! Nuh-uh! We are NOT doing this!

Me: *holding my mashed potato-turkey-bread roll combo, seasonal tea, & autumn vibes close* NO CHRISTMAS UNTIL DECEMBER. FIGHT ME.

*1st of December*

Me: *humming It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas as I pull out my favorite tea flavor that only comes out at christmas time*

#random #seasons #seasonal #vibes #autumn #autumn vibes #thanksgiving #christmas #holiday #random thought

[that-sleepless-bard]

I am very bored and curious so I’m gonna put this here: Writing Prompt

Do with it what you wish, I hope to see what you create

The battle is over. It was nothing big, just some random bad guys. Yet as MC looks around, they notice the usually tough character is quieter than usual, and has tears in their eyes. When MC approaches Toughie, they turn away and dismiss it.

“The fight just… reminded me of something.” They mutter, starting to walk away.

#prompts #writing prompts #writing #ideas #random #random thoughts #tropes #idk i just like the idea

[that-sleepless-bard]

Anyone else like, begrudgingly speak child? Like, you understand what kids are babbling about but you hate the concept of children themselves?

Kid: *rambling incoherently*

Adult: …what?

Me: *grumbling in the corner* They’re talking about the best parts of their favorite show…

#random #random thoughts

[that-sleepless-bard]

Gradual realization as I continue reading

“Listen here you little sh-”

A serial killer known as “Blue” always leaves behind exactly three clues per murder. After months of being unable to catch her, the authorities turn to the only man smart enough to figure out Blue’s Clues: the world-famous detective named Steve.

#writing

[that-sleepless-bard]

What if immortals exist, but the ability is inherent and they’re smart enough to fake their own death after 80-100 years?

#random #random thoughts #question

[that-sleepless-bard]

Me: Okay, I’ll just go on my phone for a little bit.

*five hours later*

Me: MY GODS PINTEREST STOP GIVING ME FUNNY THINGS TO SAVE-

#random #random thoughts

[that-sleepless-bard]

Wuestion: What do you do if you live with the God of Shutting Down Interests?

#random #random thoughts #questions

[that-sleepless-bard]

The Owl House as love languages

Obligatory spoiler warning

Luz: Physical touch

Eda: Acts of service

King: Quality time

Raine: Acts of service/Quality time

Amity: Acts of service/Physical touch

Willow: Words of affirmation/Gift giving

Gus: Words of affirmation/quality time

Lilith: Acts of service

Hunter: Acts of service

Darius: Acts of service/Gift giving (maybe?)

Collector: Quality time

#the owl house #toh #random #raine whispers #toh raine #raine #toh eda #eda #edalyn clawthorne #toh spoilers #eda clawthorne #analysis #luz #eda clawthorn #luz noceda #random thoughts #king clawthorne #king toh #darius #toh darius