the-world-will-end-system

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my personality is that i have multiple and you need to guess which one i am whenever we interact

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there’s a guy at work who’s forcing everyone in the breakroom to gender me right by yelling my name at any given moment 

he also said he was sorry he read my deadname on the worksheet but was “going to get black out drunk and probably forget dw” 

edit : im a trans guy, im out and on T but im very short that’s why my buddy asserts my gender for me i repeat he’s not outing me he’s doing it to keep me from being misgendered

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i love cishet dudes who are super casual lgbt allies. like my roommate tries super hard to prove she’s a good ally and still fucks up my pronouns but then her cousin waltzes in like “hey so she said that you were a girl but youre a dude now. that’s pretty tight bro.” and then did not fuck up my pronouns once despite bein shitfaced

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Water biscuits

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Gomez and Morticia Addams got divorced. I woke up mortified and with a sense of inexplicable dread.

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alright I reflected on the self. I'm 100% sure the beasts are the issue here

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Agdgsgsgsg I’m LIVING for this Reef2Reef thread. This guy was worried about his urchins getting sunburnt so he made them little hats

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Throwback to when I took painkillers and woke up with Photoshop open on my computer to this image I had made

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im at a restaurant right now and there's this like 16 year old kid sitting at the table next to me completely alone with like 6 racks of ribs. hes eating like 1 rib every 10 seconds and the poor server who was assigned to him has to keep getting him new ribs. ive been here for an hour just watching this kid inhale ribs like he's gonna die the next day. he probably will given the amount of hot sauce he put on them

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a really little animated black cat with giant eyes and no other discernible features

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what’s that noise. 

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i'm sorry but this is fucking sending me

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ok so i watch a lot of youtube videos about chess despite barely knowing how to play and something really funny happened on chess.com which is the site people go to to play chess online

basically they have a bunch of chess bots you can choose to play against at various different power levels (~100 is total noob, ~2500 is like, mega grandmaster). and recently they released a bunch of...cat themed bots?

but the noteworthy one is the cosmic horror known as Mittens.

Mittens has a listed power level of 1. However, that is a deception. Mittens is actually incredibly powerful, defeating top players with ease, and actually holding his own against the most powerful chess bots in existence.

also he sends you these weird messages like

absolutely wild

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one time a guy i know whose girlfriend was heavily pregnant didn’t tweet anything for a whole day so i texted him ‘congrats on your baby’ and made him think i had some kind of baby precognition 

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Favourite vegetable?? Pls vote. trying to prove smth!!

1105 votes • Poll ends in 5 days 9 hours

🥕 carrotjesus Follow

OP clearly yuor followers are biased. Carrots are objectively better than broccoli of all things and i think it's problematic that you called carrots stinky it's really manipulative. also tomatos aren't technically a vegetable. maybe try thinking before posting passive agressive polls next time

🤡 jizzardtower Follow

shgdfdsg these tags. yes. chicken wings my favourite vegetable

✴ cadylady2002 Follow

Haha. I just realized the #eggplant looks a little like a d***. That is so #funny !!

👁 shreksbellybutton Follow

🦷 pigeonsarecool Follow

CHICKEM WIMGS

🍵 souperdouper Follow

shoutout to soup. won't stop making shoutouts for soup until one hears me and comes walkig over. i want soup.