It's something about fresh air and being wrapped up in the breeze with an electric drink. Seeing you wear that warm smile. I loved you in the smoothie shop. Fell deeper wiping cuban food off your face. Praying to keep you, the palm trees, and rainy beaches in my memory forever. My heart is so full with you. For you, I will always unravel.
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Venom. Ilustraci贸n de Erik Larsen.
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I was hoping you would choose me-
Everyday, without hesitation; I was a fool.
We wrapped ourselves in sweat, curiosity, and lies drenched in delusion and tequila-
I finally admitted I loved you when July broke into August,
Some time between the loud music, rolling hips, and soft kissing all night,
I can鈥檛 recall a single goodbye- just a bunch of 鈥淪ee you later鈥漵 that really meant will you stay with me forever
I drove 100mph down the interstate trying to get to you over and over like you might fade away if I took too long
But we slowed down when the rain crashed into our conversation, the moment was melodic listening to your voice and sirens through traffic.
It was a mess, our life together has always been chaotic.
This was the summer I was supposed to pick my heart off the ground and stand up straight and see crystal clear.
But we collided so hard l could barely stumble forward, vision blurred, I just wanted to stay with you.
I would have loved you beyond all my wildest dreams.
My heart still feels like it will fall out my chest when I remember you are gone,
You didn鈥檛 chase after me when we finally cracked, when you saw the past and present slipping out your grasp and I had to watch you run back to her intoxicating mess and I got burned in the path.
This summer was ours, it was so easy.
I wish I would known when the heat began to bend and bruise at Fall鈥檚 hands, we would too.
I wish I would have loved you so much more.
I was scared, but I knew, all hearts break when summer ends.
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Reminder: black love is alive, and well.
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im filled with so much love and light and happiness i could burst, and it's all because of me. no one else. that's the truest form i have ever felt.
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Sky, Wind, Fire, Water, Earth (Naomi Kawase, 2001)
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