thespectacularspider-girl

[thespectacularspider-girl]

[thespectacularspider-girl]

Retiring this Blog

So yes, I’m retiring this blog as of right now. I will be turning off the ability to send asks, messages or submissions. The queue is empty so you will not be seeing any more posts after today.

Why am I retiring? Mostly for mental health. I felt like nine years of political discourse has not done me much good. I have clinical depression and I’ve been making progress in combating it but this blog has not helped overall. I found that the constant inquiry about political discussion, getting into arguments, etc, made my mood deteriorate. Even worse, when my mood was already in bad shape, I’d find myself tempted to engage in discourse as a distraction. This might work in the short term but in the long term this only did damage to me.

For a few weeks I was focusing on my art and other creative work and I found that I was genuinely happy with my life during that time. And when politics came knocking again, I found myself splashed with cold water and miserable again. That feeling of being dragged backwards is what spurred this decision.

I want to focus on the things that make me happy; game design, writing and artwork. That is what I’m going to do. Maybe, one day in the distant future, I might come back and this blog might revive. But I can’t promise that.

Since I announced my intent, I’ve been flooded with numerous comments and messages from people who wanted to thank me or wish me luck. Honestly, it’s been overwhelming to experience, and this week has been an emotional rollercoaster for me, having realized I’ve had an impact on so many people. I never really expected to be worthy of such an outpouring.

To everyone who supported me, who wished me well, who worried about my wellbeing and who made me laugh, thank you so much. It wasn’t all bad, lots of my time here was good. And that’s solely based on the people who followed me and who I surrounded myself with. I made friends here who I don’t think I can ever give up.

I just want everyone to know how grateful I am for being part of your experience. I recognized so many of you over the years, seeing the same people in the notes or in my inbox. I remember all the running jokes made about me, good and bad, and I hope at least some managed to make you laugh.

I know that it might seem like a story without a conclusion. I know people have followed me for a long time, wanting to see how it all turns out. I’m sorry that I’m closing this book without any definite answers. I wish I could have posted one day that I got to move and be out of the closet, to heal and recover, but it hasn’t happened yet. You will just have to hope that things turn out better for me. That’s all you can you and all I can do, really.

If there’s one thing I can ask of all of you reading this, it’s this; Please take care of yourself. Find the things you find joy in and do them. Life is too short to have it be spent in misery and anger. Don’t let the negativity consume you because it helps nobody and only serves to damage you. Appreciate what you have and cherish the things you take for granted.

Thank you, again, to everyone. You’ve turned something I was sad to do into something I won’t ever forget. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

Take care of yourselves, everyone.

Goodbye.

[thespectacularspider-girl]

[thespectacularspider-girl]

all these brothers in christ … where are my sisters in sin? 

[thespectacularspider-girl]

Buff Blind warrior lass & medusa

[thespectacularspider-girl]

pspsps Chocolate Guy stans

[image description: an Instagram story from Amaury Guichon (the "Chocolate Guy"), which shows a side-by-side comparison of him in 2007 vs him now (2022). the 2007 picture shows him, significantly younger, standing next to and pointing at a small sculpture of an octopus attacking a ship. the 2022 picture shows him now, standing next to and pointing at a massive sculpture of a kraken holding a large anchor. the second sculpture is roughly three to four times the size of the first one, and finished to a much higher degree of quality. end ID]

[thespectacularspider-girl]

Do you think that stepping away from tumblr will stop other people having discourse in things you enjoy?

Probably not

[thespectacularspider-girl]

So the Embracer deal is actually a good thing? I was worried thought it meant the ips were pretty much dead.

Nope. Embracer is basically a massive holding company (that used to be THQ Nordic).

The purpose of companies like this is they create a highly diversified portfolio, sit back and let money roll in. They basically just let their subsidiaries run themselves and skim money off the top.

Acquiring Crystal Dynamics, Eidos and SE Montreal means they're going to be put to work, not just sit on them or wait to sell the rights.

And let's be real here. Deus Ex, Thief and Legacy of Kain were all dead already. Square was never going to give them a chance after they underperformed and how SE treats their western properties.

Case in point: They sold these three companies for 100 million dollars each. They saw zero value in them.

[thespectacularspider-girl]

Don't retire the blog. Just switch to horny posting 24/7.

There would be no survivors if I unleashed my full potential.

[thespectacularspider-girl]

[thespectacularspider-girl]

They were sold to “The Embracer Group”, a company that has a history of hands-off game management. Basically they let their studios do what they want so long as they make a profit.

So this means Tomb Raider, Thief, Deus Ex and Legacy of Kain are all back on the table with ZERO Square Enix meddling.

Who is ready for a (real) Thief 4? Who is ready for a third Adam Jenson game? Who is looking forward to a potential Legacy of Kain reboot?

This is one of those pieces of gaming news that stirs the long dead corpse of hope in my cold, cold heart.

lmao square enix just sold a bunch of their ips to get money for nfts

[thespectacularspider-girl]

I looooooove outer worlds cuz it gives you decisions like this

and basically all I see is

#3 responses that are functionally the same #and then a 'yes' and 'no' #yeah that's outer worlds alright

[thespectacularspider-girl]

Been thinking on this for a while

I have an announcement.

I’ve come to realize that my mental health has been suffering more and more as time goes on. Despite my attempts to fix it, I notice that I have been repeatedly become burned out.

I believe the culprit to be politics and negativity. Constantly coming back here and witnessing things that upset me or demand me to be negative, constantly getting into arguments, just tanks my mental health. And it becomes a cycle, as when my mental health suffers, I seek out more things that upset me.

It was when I was making OC’s, creating art, that I realized I was happier than I had been in months. And then a political question came into my inbox and it was like a splash of cold water. I realized I resented that question for pulling me out of a place I didn’t want to leave.

I also don’t hold it against the anon who asked that question. My blog has been political for years and years, it is not unreasonable to think I want to be political. I have so much baggage from the years of running this blog, which is why I don’t think I can just wash my hands of it all and continue on. This isn’t helped by Tumblr’s changes to the @ and reblog system.

So my decision has been made. I think it was made a week ago and I’ve mostly just been working myself up to this.

I am going to be phasing out this blog for my own sake. I will be continuing to focus on my creative ventures because that is what brings me joy. I hope to expand my creative goals further and further in the future. I want to continue to focus on media and hobbies, I want to try and get back into anime and find something I can love again instead of wallowing.

I know this may disappoint some of you. And I do feel like I’ve let some of you down. People want me to go back to the arena time and time again but I just can’t do it anymore. If you explicitly follow me for my political stuff, that’s fine, but I think if you did, you must have been aware that I didn’t want to keep getting dragged back into politics.

I really don’t want to lose a lot of the people who I’ve come to know here. I see people who are fans, long time followers, etc, and I don’t want to just abandon all of you. I don’t know how many of my follower count is active, but I’ve always appreciated every one of you and your support.

I have set up a Discord link to permit anyone who is still wanting to follow me to do so. I know not everyone has Discord, so people are also free to directly message me during this time.

I am not just going to peace out, I am phasing out over time. I am also not going to just delete this blog. Maybe, one day, I’ll come back and feel like I can engage in healthy discourse again. Maybe not. But I’ll leave the option open for myself.

Thank you all for reading. I didn’t come to this decision lightly.

[thespectacularspider-girl]

Those android thighs are from the vtuber Roboco btw. Who actually does look like that, and they aren't pants. It's exposed metal.

Goals.

[thespectacularspider-girl]

Don't retire the blog. Just switch to horny posting 24/7.

There would be no survivors if I unleashed my full potential.

[thespectacularspider-girl]

You use GIMP, right? What plug-ins do you recommend?

The only plug-in I use is the Resynthesizer plug-in.

It's makes removing things from images easier. You lasso select whatever you want to remove, then the plug-in will run an algorithm that takes the pixels around your selection and arranges to them 'overwrite' the selection.

The first technique is using Resynthesizer.

[thespectacularspider-girl]

vi gets scritches