thestaffoffice

[thestaffoffice]

I do so adore receiving messages in the inbox. It’s like having little love letters written to me personally. Sometimes the love letters say “did you see this post?” and sometimes the love letters say “That post of yours made me laugh” and sometimes the love letters say “I feel sad, tell me something to make me feel better” and sometimes the love letters contain an incomprehensible combination of consonants that both confound and amuse me to no end. Yes, send me your “ASHSKSKSKFHFJ” and your “sQwkwkwlPP”. I see you. My heart is full.

#It’s like having a little messenger pigeon come to the window of my tower to deliver news. #thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #/j for legal reasons #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff #staff office asks #ask #not my gif #april fools crabs #sponsored pikachu man ad #/j por razones legales #lgbtq+ #kind sir #inbox #messages #flood my inbox #mail #you’ve got mail #snail mail #messenger pigeon #staff office inbox #happy new year #HNY #hny2023 #positivity #warm #my heart is full

[thestaffoffice]

Wioghti

I find myself — confusingly — aroused.

#This reminds me of Bowuigi for reasons I cannot explain. #and that pleases me #thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #/j for legal reasons #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff #staff office asks #ask #/j por razones legales #bowuigi #bowser x luigi #luigi x bowser #mario bros #mario and luigi

[thestaffoffice]

kind sir, are male presenting nipples allowed here?

Dear It’s Tessa Ray Bitch,

All nipples are allowed in this space, and indeed, encouraged — with one large category of nipples excepted. To be precise, the nipples of transphobes, homophobes, racists, sexists, ageists, ableists, and generally assholes can stay the hell out.

However, the nipples of everyone else, male presenting, female presenting, or not presenting at all, are as the French say les bienvenus.

The more the merrier, yadda yadda, etc etc.

Signed,

Sir Staff Office

P.S. — Happy New Year! Or should I say, Happy Nipple Year. Cheerio ✨

#elon musk’s cursed titties can stay the hell out of this house #along with the nipples of any other assholes not mentioned #thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #/j for legal reasons #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff #staff office asks #ask

[thestaffoffice]

by god, we gonched our way into 2022 and we will gonch our way out of it

gonching our way into 2023

#it's gonchin time #gonching #gonchposting #unreality

[thestaffoffice]

gonching our way into 2023

#happy new year #thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff #staff office asks #ask #scorsese goncharov #martin scorsese goncharov #goncharov #goncharov 1973 #gonchandrey #katya goncharov #unreality

[thestaffoffice]

someone needs to ooga-booga rishi sunak. give him a good jumpscare. just enough to get him to piss and shit his pants on live television. thanks that’s all i’m asking

#opening a coal mine you stupid fucker #stop that shit #send him to the mine #thestaffoffice #/j for legal reasons #politics #coal mine #uk coal mine #rishi sunak #rishi #sunak #prime minister #uk prime minister #prime minister sunak

[thestaffoffice]

i agree

I love it when I’m right.

#people tend to agree #thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #/j for legal reasons #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff office asks #Goncharov #gonch posting #unreality

[thestaffoffice]

why

Let me answer your question with another and perhaps more important question: why the fuck not?

#In sending me this question you lost 30 seconds of your life that you’ll never get back. How does that make you feel? #thestaffoffice #staff interactions #/j for legal reasons #staff 🦀 #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff office asks

[thestaffoffice]

We do, it’s just that the candy cane icon is currently being held hostage by the tumblr gold logo. Hopefully, the staff will ensure the candy cane’s swift release as soon as possible.

NOTE: I MADE THE GIF. CANDY CANE DESIGN BY ALEXANDRA ERKAEVA

ID: the golden tumblr logo has moving eyes on it and it looks bored. it's holding a nerf gun and pointing it towards a candy cane tumblr logo, which has large cute eyes and looks unbothered by the situation. NOTE: the candy cane design is by Alexandra Erkaeva, not me. The gif is by me. /end ID

Come on tumblr where's the candy cane icon now that it's December. You must have one somewhere

#CANDY CANE HOSTAGE SITUATION #AAAAAAH FREE THE CANDY CANE #as you can see even Tumblr Gold Logo is bored #let candy cane have its day in the sun #or should I say snow #my post my gif #thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff #Christmas tumblr logo #alexandra erkaeva art #tumblr logo #tumblr gold #new tumblr logo #Christmas #I’ll be home four crisp mice #christmois #merry chrysler #merry crimus #holidays #noel #noël #sinterklaas #Father Christmas #Santa Claus #elves #North Pole

[thestaffoffice]

It’s actually a dinosaur skeleton, I just can’t spell.

For reference: these were the sword/knives.

These go hard, as the youths say. The knives look like they would come in handy. For, you know. Peeling potatoes. Obviously.

#no crimes here #this is a crime free zone #unless you count peeling potatoes as a crime in which case #idk what to say #thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #/j for legal reasons #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff #staff office asks

[thestaffoffice]

Personally, speaking for myself, in my opinion, respectfully,

I fully agree.

#thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #/j for legal reasons #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff #staff office asks #ask

[thestaffoffice]

Excuses me kind sir.

You created the bestestestest app icon and instead of firing that alien/pizza, you push tumbrlers to illigaly print their own hoodie with tumbrl's reaper??

Where's your spice™.

My spice is in my blood. This is generally why the vampires stay away from me. Too spicy.

#thank you #thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #/j for legal reasons #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff #staff office asks

[thestaffoffice]

one time a frog peeded in my hand :(

unfortunate. :((

#sounds upsetting #however - FROG #frog is good #thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #/j for legal reasons #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff #staff office asks #ask

[thestaffoffice]

do you trust the golden rabbit?

perhaps.

#indubitably #thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #/j for legal reasons #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff #staff office asks #ask

[thestaffoffice]

do you like cheese

yes.

#thank you for asking the important questions #thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #/j for legal reasons #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff #staff office asks #ask

[thestaffoffice]

there is simply nothing more tumblr™️ than goncharov.

#thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #/j for legal reasons #bring back the crabs #the staff office #goncherov #goncharav #gonchposting #goncharov #goncharov 1973 #scorsese goncharov #martin scorsese #martin scorsese goncharov #matteo jwhj 0715 #katya deserved better #katya #ice pick joe #naples #staff #goncharov movie #Goncharov film #tumblr culture #unreality #continued gonching #gonchrey #gonchandrey #goncharov art #goncharov meta #goncharov headcanons

[thestaffoffice]

would you

yes

#how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck wood #thestaffoffice #staff interactions #staff 🦀 #/j for legal reasons #bring back the crabs #the staff office #staff #staff office asks #the office has heard your call