theveryconfusedgirl

[theveryconfusedgirl]

I DESERVE COMPENSATION FOR EMOTIONAL DAMAGES FROM HAVING TO SEE THIS FACIAL EXPRESSION AGAIN

[theveryconfusedgirl]

I will never not be able to see this man as Simon Snow ever again. This brain rot needs shared with someone else because I can't be the the only one who sees this.

#snow baz #simon snow #simon snow series #simon snow salisbury #brain rot #carry on rainbow rowell #carry on #carry on series

[theveryconfusedgirl]

Now all I can see in my head is striper snake Crowley.

#snek crowley #crowley good omens

[theveryconfusedgirl]

[theveryconfusedgirl]

I feel this and the Hillywood parode. Yess!

We are one month closer to Season 2! Wahoo! 🥰❤

[theveryconfusedgirl]

It’s that time, folks! All Hallow’s Eve 🎃 Come one, come all to the 2022 Dean🔪Cas Horrorfest Masterpost!! Never before seen, first in it’s existence, one of a kind, certified freakshow of a little bang. Below you will find monsters and mayhem, murder and macabre, but before you enter the land of the dead, I just want to give a huge shoutout to the authors and artists whose participation and enthusiasm made this one of the most fun bang experiences I could’ve ever asked for, to my second in command @maggiemaybe160 for wielding my ax on the discord, and lastly to myself @kingdumbass for giving birth to this insane devil baby of a destiel bang. Insert spooky Elle Woods “We did it!” here. Caution, Readers, Enter At Your Own Risk 👻

Keep reading

[theveryconfusedgirl]

carving deep blue ripples

Author: dothraki_shieldmaiden | Artist: kingdumbass Posting on Monday March 20

With his little brother at Stanford and his father searching out leads, Dean Winchester is left to hunt alone. It’s fun, except in the ways that it really blows. Things start to turn around when he meets Castiel Novak, another hunter. Castiel is aloof and maybe a little too sarcastic, but he’s good backup (and pretty easy on the eyes. Not that Dean’s looking or anything). After a few hunts, Dean is willing to make his and Castiel’s partnership permanent (and he’s not exactly averse to adding another component to their partnership either. After all, he’s caught Castiel looking at him just as many times as Castiel’s caught him looking). But Castiel is hiding a secret, and it’s so explosive that it threatens to not only tear them apart, but also tear apart everything Dean believes in. 

Keep reading for a sneak preview!

Keep reading

[theveryconfusedgirl]

An Accounting of Contradictions

An Accounting of Contradictions by TheTwistedWillow (@thetwistedwillow) Rating: Teen Word count: 14k

Cas is a bank teller who falls, hard, for the handsome customer in the black muscle car. He looks forward to his Fridays, when the mysterious man puts his deposit in via the bank drive-thru. They slowly get to know each other in their weekly 5-minute interactions. Will there come a day when Cas will finally get to meet Dean face-to-face?

Listen… things are tough right now in this world of ours. Most days, it feels like we’re living in the flaming This is Fine meme, so why not take a break for some fluff? 

An Accounting of Contradictions is exactly what you need. Set in a world without monsters, Cas is just a regular guy who leads a normal, mundane life working as a teller in Sioux Falls. He’s content with his routine life until a gorgeous man in an equally gorgeous car begins to frequent his bank window. Despite not being able to see each other, the two form an easy rapport, which turns into pining, obvious from both sides despite the story being in Cas’s pov. 

Dean is extra sweet in this story. This writer’s version of him is one never hurt by the pain and suffering the Dean we know and love is used to. It’s a breath of fresh air sometimes, to read who Dean might have become without the hefty dose of trauma. 

One thing I love in any story is the inclusion of some of our favorite friends and family; this story doesn’t disappoint. While our glimpses at Sam, Eileen, Charlie, Dorothy, Gath, Bess, Benny, and Jo are brief, they’re well done and entirely in character, which isn’t always easy with a limited word count. They all push along the story and add depth to Dean’s character as Cas gets to know him at the same time we do. 

Overall, An Accounting of Contradictions is a sweet story about taking chances, and breaking out of a mundane life for the chance to experience something new, maybe in a way you never have before.

[theveryconfusedgirl]

Sternberg's Triangular Theory of Love

Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love by aishitara (@aishitara) Rating: Explicit Word count: 14k

Dean clears his throat and says, “I have an idea for how to deal with your mom.” He looks away as he takes a long swallow of beer. “But you’re probably not gonna like it.” Castiel grunts. “Tell me anyway. You’ve got one idea more than me.” Huffing a small laugh, Dean says, “Yeah, well, we’ll see.” He looks over at Castiel, lower lip caught between his teeth. “I’ll go with you,” he says earnestly. “To Thanksgiving.” Castiel stares at Dean blankly, not following. “Y’know,” Dean says, suddenly interested in removing the label from his beer. “As your boyfriend.”

There’s something about pretend boyfriends fics where they’re both already in love with each other but think the other is pretending for the sake of the charade that’s just chef’s kiss!

This fic was so sweet and so full of pining, full of want, it’s so tangible the way they feel about each other having been friends for years. The thing is, thanks to a series of misunderstandings, they both think the other made it clear he only wants to remain friends and doesn’t want anything else.

Not even when Castiel eavesdrop Dean telling his mother he’s in love with him does he believe him, because Castiel thinks Dean is just pretending, all a huge act so Castiel’s mother will believe they’re really together and will finally get off Castiel’s back about him never dating anyone.

Seriously, all the pining!! Go read this now, you won’t regret it.

[theveryconfusedgirl]

Hello! I was wondering if you knew of any fics where Crowley is being a small snake, maybe riding around in Aziraphale’s pocket or somewhere else on his person :)

Hi! Here are some fics in which, at some point, Crowley is a small enough snake to be carried by Aziraphale...

The Most Meaningful Jewelry by fractalgeometry (G)

The snake slid up the arm of the sofa and up Aziraphale’s arm, resting his chin on the angel’s shoulder for a moment before flowing on, over Aziraphale’s shoulders and down to the sofa on the other side. He wound himself into a loose set of coils, tail resting gently against Aziraphale’s hip.

On serpents and senses by LilithReisender (G)

No matter what he did, Crowley couldn't escape the cold. It froze through his scales and seeped into his bones, leaving him feeling hollow. The once warm sand underneath him offered no comfort as he curled in on himself, desperate for any warmth. He couldn't change back into human form even if he had wanted to. Stupid humans and their bloody stupid magic.

Wronged the Tides by ThornsOfWinter (T)

In a universe where demons are quite tiny, adorable even, they can still have big opinions. When Crawley finds Aziraphale watching animals marching two by two onto a big boat, the little demon has some important questions...

[Can be read as stand-alone.]

After the sky had cried its eyes out and got around to the part where it insisted it was fine, no need for a tissue thank you, the Garden’s remaining days were not many. The Almighty was closing up shop. You didn’t have to go home, but you couldn’t stay there.

When word reached Crawley, trickled down from the curving leaves of the bush they had curled beneath for a nice nap--something the demon had just invented and was very certain would catch on with the right audience--they made sure to check on the strangely kind angel.

A little short on Time by Augenblickgotter (T)

An innocuous cuckoo clock shows up at the Bookshop while Aziraphale is running an errand. Crowley sticks his finger in a trap and soon both of them are very literally trying to beat the clock before time runs out for Crowley.

Safeguard by HolyCatsAndRabbits (E)

Written for the prompt: "Aziraphale runs, out of the back room of his bookshop, a very small rescue for abandoned iguanas. One day, he finds a cat carrier on his front step. Inside is a snake with a note that says, ambiguously: 'Safeguard.'"

Choose Your Princes Wisely by ZehWulf (T)

“There’s an enchanted castle West in the Hellian slopes, and apparently it comes with a prince looking for a bride or bridegroom to free him from a dark fae’s curse.”

“I see,” Aziraphale says finally, when he realizes both Gabriel and Uriel are staring at him expectantly. “You want me to marry a beast?”

Gabriel's mouth flattens. “I want you to take this gods’ blessed opportunity to secure your family’s future for good."

OR

Aziraphale is a professional quest hero who just wants to sit by the fire and read a book, if his overbearing family will ever let him; Crowley is a serpent demon who needs a gullible hero he can con into gathering some critical ingredients for a human corporation spell. Hijinks and a lot of terribly inconvenient feelings ensue.

- Mod D

[theveryconfusedgirl]

FREE ENTRY INTO FREE BOOK RAFFLE

Hi!!!

My book could use a few more reviews on Amazon!!! The site does NOT require you to purchase any book/product in order to review, you just need to have an active Amazon account! SO if you purchased Fire & Ice from me directly OR even just read the *cough* "first draft" version (it's still on AO3), you can participate! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY RAFFLE!!

You could WIN a FREE paperback copy of the original Fire & Ice (or ANY one of my typeset and print fics, your choice)! Enter by simply leaving a review for Fire & Ice on Amazon! SS proof of the review here or DM it to any of my social media inboxes.

You may enter the FREE review raffle up to two times: One review MUST be on Amazon. A second review on Goodreads/another book review site will count towards ONE additional entry. Winners chosen by RNG or randomized wheel spin 1/29.

Again: you do NOT need to have purchased from Amazon to leave a review there!

The review raffle is completely FREE and will just take a minute or two of your time! You could win a whole book!!! Why not try?? Amazon: https://tinyurl.com/FireIcebyRL Goodreads: https://goodreads.com/book/show/63904203-fire-ice… Please signal boost if you see this :-D

[theveryconfusedgirl]

Hello! I hope you're having a good day!

Do you have any queer enemies to lovers recs?

-AZ

Hey 😊 Thanks, I hope you're having a good day too!

[theveryconfusedgirl]

Hi hello good afternoon I am supplying you with wlw book recs because we all deserve them. Please reblog with your own recs because I’ve only been reading sapphic books for a few months so haven’t covered loads of amazing ones, and hopefully this can become a massive rec list of wlw books :)

Also please please please check the TWs for all of these so that you can stay happy, healthy and safe 💗.

Fantasy:

- The Priory of the Orange Tree: [“We may be small, and we may be young, but we will shake the world for our beliefs”] Look I know you’ve all heard of it. Now read it. Swords. Queer women. Queer women with swords. Dragons. Castles. Battles. Many many many pages of beautiful words. There is nothing missing from this book.

- Cinderella is Dead: [“I don't want to be saved by some knight in shining armour. I'd like to be the one in the armour, and I'd like to be the one doing the saving.”] Fuck the patriarchy. Dystpian. Gay. Fantasy. Cinderella is dead (wow). Badass main character. Fighting for rights and fighting for eachother. 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

- Girls of Paper and Fire: [“Instead of disappearing, she makes me feel reappeared. Reimagined. Her touch shapes me, draws out the boldness that had been hiding in my core.”] We said learning to heal! We said finding safety in eachothers arms! We said fighting the oppressive government! We said fuck the patriarchy! We said fantasy women with swords! We said (kinda) enemies to lovers! We said please check the trigger warnings for this book!

- A Dark and Hollow Star: [“The number one law of the universe is choice, after all — bad things happen to the people who take that option away from you.”] Fantasy that actually uses the words bisexual and lesbian and gay and genderfluid!!! Urban fantasy. Four main characters: two mlm, two wlw. Swords and monsters and fae and powers and tension and fate. Read for the pretty cover, stay for the characters.

- Gideon the Ninth: [“I cannot conceive of a universe without you in it”] This book is dark and horror-y and gory and weird as fuck. This book has skeletons and necromancy and a huge weird haunted house and everyone dying under mysterious circumstances. This book has enemies to i-dont-even-know-what. You will not know what is happening in this book but you will love it. Trust me.

Dystopian:

- We Set the Dark on Fire: [“Maybe this was trust ... Giving someone the power to ruin you, betting your life on the belief that they wouldn't.”] once again, repeat after me: fuck the patriarchy. Rebellion. Enemies to lovers. Dystopian world where every man gets two wives. Guess what happens 👀

Contemporary:

- The Henna Wars: [“I've never really thought about having a type. I guess my type is....beautiful girl. Which is a lot of them. Most of them? Pretty much all girls”]. Girl dealing with the aftermath of coming out to her parents has a crush on a girl who is competing against her in a school competition. Main character is muslim, bangladeshi and lesbian and love interest is black, brazilian and bisexual. Just read it. Don’t do it for me. Do it for yourself. You deserve to smile.

- Her Royal Highness: [“PERRY I’VE FOUND AN AMERICAN!”] Look this book may be cliche and predictable and a little ridiculous at times but it made me unfathomably happy so I don’t care. Scottish boarding school+royalty+an american. Enemies to lovers but not im-gonna-stab-you enemies to lovers (which ive read my fair share of truet me), more like why-are-you-so-unbearably-irritating enemies to lovers you know?

- Written in the Stars: [“I’ll break into your apartment and move everything three inches to the left and fuck with your flow, okay?”] Good, solid contemporary new adult romance. Enemies to lovers. Grump x sunshine. Actually has a sex scene (this might not be everyones thing i just noticed wlw books often skirt around them so thought id point it out). Ugh its just so cute.

- You Should See Me In a Crown: [“When I open my mouth, everything happens so fast—the way I can feel her everywhere, the way my hands steady instead of shake where they tangle in her hair because I’ve maybe never felt so grounded before, so rooted in a moment”] What happens when a Black queer girl tries for prom queen in a weird, cliquey prom-obsessed school? What happens when one of the other competitors is the unabashedly gay cute new girl? This is what happens. Guys. Guys. Guys. Read this one oh my god. I say this about every book but seriously READ THIS ONE. So so so so so good. Everything you could ever want in a queer coming of age book.

- The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo: [“You do not know how fast you have been running, how hard you have been working, how truly exhausted you are, until someone stands behind you and says, “It’s OK, you can fall down now. I’ll catch you.”] I know you’ve all heard this but you’re about to hear it again. Queer women in the 50s? Sign me up! Sign yourself up! Buy this book and then read this book! Freak out about this book! Cry about this book! Tell everyone you’ve ever met to read this book! Cry some more about this book! Make this book your whole personality!

Thriller(?):

- The Girls I’ve Been: [“There is no normal. There is just a bunch of people pretending there is. There's just different levels of pain. Different stages of safe. The biggest con of all is that there's a normal.”] Thriller. Guns. Menstrual cups. Con artists. That awkward moment when you’re stuck in a bank robbery with two murderous men, a child, your ex boyfriend and your current girlfriend. Not romance but has romantic themes (established relationship). Coming to terms with childhood trauma and abuse. This book is short but deceptively heavy with the themes it deals with so, again, please check the TWs.

Ones on my TBR:

- Last Night at the Telegraph Club

- The Miseducation of Cameron Post

- A Memory Called Empire

- This Is How You Lose the Time War

- Girl, Serpent, Thorn

- This Poison Heart

- One Last Stop

- She Who Became The Sun (omg i want to read this so so so badly)

- The Weight of the Stars

- These Feathered Flames

- Honey Girl

- The Chosen and the Beautiful

- She Drives Me Crazy

[theveryconfusedgirl]

I gotta make the joke.

We'll never know unless you bite him. You mean poisonous.

But In all honestly I think he could be venomous if he wants to be. I think it depends on his thoughts on the matter mostly.

This might be a dumb question, but is Crowley poisonous?

[theveryconfusedgirl]

Serious question what do you recommend for those who were here before the Twitter issue like Neil Gaiman.

hey. the celebrities and corporations are going to try tumblr. you may want to drive them off the site, or find them amusing, ie “well THIS one can stay.” they may try to engage with the culture. they may do their research. DO NOT ENGAGE. do not bother. don’t fucking acknowledge them. don’t mess with their heads. don’t reply to them as a bit. let them think this site is a lost cause. let them fizzle out and die

[theveryconfusedgirl]

Okay fuck it if this post reaches 666k notes by the end of 2023 I'll practise basic self care

Why 666k? Because it's funny and impossible so good fucking luck

[theveryconfusedgirl]

I am part of the supernatural Fandom obviously but I've apparently been active in Good Omens lately because my immediate thought was Anthony Crowley and not King of Hell Crowley.

thinking about crowley shooting his shot with cas