thewitcherssongbird

[thewitcherssongbird]

“You’re doing amazing sweety, show him what he’s missing”

[thewitcherssongbird]

Siren Jaskier moodboard

#geralt x jaskier #geralt of rivia #jaskier #jaskier x geralt #geraskier #siren jaskier #siren au #dandelion #pirate au #geraskier pirate au #I gave up on actually writing the fic so have this

[thewitcherssongbird]

they’re tired

[thewitcherssongbird]

Ciri: describe your ideal partner

Geralt: brunet, sarcastic, good singer, cornflower blue eyes, not afraid of witchers

Ciri: you’ve just described Jaskier

Geralt: fuck

*later that day*

Ciri: describe your ideal partn-

Jaskier, without looking up: Geralt

[thewitcherssongbird]

Jaskier would definitely just peck Geralt on the forehead and he'd sit there speechless for 5 minutes before he'd remember what he was doing

#geralt x jaskier #geralt of rivia #jaskier #jaskier x geralt #geraskier #the witcher #the witcher netflix #wiedzmin #witcher netflix #witcher headcanon #witcher shitpost #geraskier headcanon #geraskier shitpost #geraskier fluff

[thewitcherssongbird]

Oh yeah call me out will you and thank you good night to you too

Good morning/afternoon/night to people who miss Renfri, geraskier shippers who don’t hate on Yennefer for being Geralt’s love interest, those who became interested in The Witcher after seeing Jaskier, wlw/nblw with crushes on Yennefer, netflix-only fans whose understandings of Eskel and Lambert come only from fanfic, “Jaskier Goes To Kaer Morhen” fanfic writers, Jaskier Whump writers who utilize the “Tortured By Nilfgaard for Information about Geralt and Ciri” trope, any fanfic writer who has named a fanfic/chapter title after a The Amazing Devil lyric, those who appreciate the nuance of Calanthe’s character, and people who love Dara and wish he got more recognition

[thewitcherssongbird]

[thewitcherssongbird]

This has me dying

[thewitcherssongbird]

What if Geralt gets cursed by a mage and suddenly becomes very loving and affectionate towards Jaskier. Staring at him softly, calling him nice words, kissing his hands. Jaskier thinks it's a love spell. And although he himself is actually in love with the Witcher, he knows he has to break the curse.

He manages to find Yennefer and asks her to break the curse. Yennefer raises an eyebrow at the way Geralt leans into Jaskier's personal space, nuzzling the side of his face. "Please." Jaskier begs, pushing Geralt away with a pained expression.

Yennefer agrees, shaking her head sympathetically. "Alright".

She leads Geralt away to another room, in order to examine him. Jaskier sits on a chair beside the door, fumbling with his hands nervously.

Finally, Yennefer returns, looking slightly shook up. Jaskier jumps to his feet, taking a step closer to her.

"What happened?"

Yennefer meets his gaze and offers him a small, knowing smile.

"It's not a love spell, bard".

"Then what it is?? Is he gonna be okay?".

"Yeah, he'll be alright. It should wear off in a few minutes".

"Thank Gods. What was it then?"

Yennefer's smile grows bigger.

"A truth spell".

[thewitcherssongbird]

Lambert: Aren't you tired playing white knight for the bard? Body guarding him? Humans are so fragile and always need to be saved, it's so annoyin-

Some rude ass stranger at the tavern: Hey Witcher, what that mouth d-

Jaskier, slamming a bar stool across the stranger's head: HE'S A LIVING BEING WITH FEELINGS AND YOU SHALL TREAT HIM WITH RESPECT-

Lambert:

Geralt: As you can see, Jaskier is actually my body guard. Body bard, if you wish.

[thewitcherssongbird]

Jaskier: (doing the love at first sight walk across the tavern)

Geralt, trying to brood:

[thewitcherssongbird]

ah yes geralt’s friend…. micebag

[thewitcherssongbird]

Jaskier sitting alone in the middle of the woods post-mountain divorce: *sneezes”

Geralt, from where he is keeping an eye on Jaskier from the top of a tree that he has climbed: Bless you.

Jaskier: ...god?

[thewitcherssongbird]

summer is ending, have some happy summer-y Jaskier and Geralt:)

[thewitcherssongbird]

He had the awkward tenderness of someone who has never been loved and is forced to improvise.

— Isabel Allende, The House of The Spirits

[thewitcherssongbird]

He had the awkward tenderness of someone who has never been loved and is forced to improvise.

— Isabel Allende, The House of The Spirits

[thewitcherssongbird]

Geralt is worried about bringing Jaskier to Kaer Morhen, cause Geralt acts like an entirely different person when he's around his brothers.

Geralt thinks that Jaskier sees him a serious man, with a secret soft side. But when Geralt's around his brothers... All hell break loose. Here's what Jaskier sees when he stays at the Witchers' keep for the winter:

- Geralt and his brothers get drunk. A lot. It usually results with one of them running around the keep, naked.

- They have ridiculous games like telling about the most brutal contract you've ever had, but replace the words "my sword" with "my dick".

- Playing strip gwent. Outside. In the middle of the coldest night of the winter.

- Planking while the others pile things up on you. Whoever manages to hold the least of things, does the others' laundry for a week.

- "Put as much stuff as you can on Vesemir, without him noticing".

- "Who can make the bard blush first without being rude" (this game is new and Geralt HATES it).

- Randomly yelling "BRUXA" in the middle of the day and all of them need to do a handstand as fast as they can. Whoever loses, does the dishes. Jaskier is still surprised how Geralt never loses at this.

- "Reply to Vesemir only in questions".

- Tell Vesemir that you fell in love with someone. And then describe your horse, without making him realize that you're talking about a horse. When Geralt attempts this, Vesemir gives him a small smile and looks at Jaskier. "Geralt sure thinks fondly of you". Eskel and Lambert spit out their soup, bursting in laughter.

- Wear one of Vesemir's shirts for as long as you can, without him noticing. Lambert always wins this one.

- Replace the lyrics to one of Jaskier's songs with the most ridiculous ones you can. Jaskier hates this game at first, but eventually he starts suggesting lines himself. One time Jaskier sings a wrong line from their game during a performance a Geralt almost chokes on his ale.

- "How many times a day Geralt smiles at Jaskier while the bard's looking away?" (Eskel and Lambert LOVE this one).

- "Who can embarrass Geralt more with a ridiculous childhood story".

- Answer "Lambert" to every one of Vesemir's questions.

- Ask Vesemir with a serious face why didn't he tell you that you were adopted.

- Teach your brother's horse to respond to a different name. Lambert is furious when Geralt teaches his horse to respond to "Aiden". "Now you can surely say that you're riding Aide-" Geralt doesn't get to finish as Lambert tackles him to the ground.

- And of course, succeed in tackling you brother randomly to the ground. They keep score.

Not only does Jaskier love these games and this new, goofy side of Geralt. He also participates in a lot of them.

And to Geralt's horror and his brothers sheer amusement, the bard's winning.