Life's not out to get you

Ash / 19 / minnesota /

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tinyplanetxplorer·2 years agoText



in skyrim i married a homeless man and even though we are married and he lives in my huge fuckin house he still wears rags and asks me to give him 1 gold whenever i see him

that’s just what men are like

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tinyplanetxplorer·2 years agoText


me (not caffeinated): anxious

me (caffeinated): anxious, but faster

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tinyplanetxplorer·3 years agoText











white1: i love broccoli

white2: omg i love broccoli too sooo much

white3: did some1 say broccoli? i love broccoli

white4: i’m factkin with broccoli uwu no doubles

white5: i’’md bbrrococoli ttoo wwhyyr r  uu a a ffakke off mme??

white6: *posts a pic of a broccoli* my boyfriend

white7: i want to shove a broccoli up my pussy

white8: omg guys i found a broccoli vibrator xD

white9: *rbs pics of broccolis and tags everyone in it*

white10: ii jsustt fuckigng lovove brrocoli soso muchy

and then there’s a “broccoli hour” which lasts 3 hours instead and you have to unfollow 10 people

This is actually really racist, but really fucking funny. I’m bouta do one with black folks and soul food, then Russians and vodka.

your url has loli on it

And? Tag my post with pedophilia again. I dare you. I’ll press charges for defamation of character.

screencapped and emailed to my lawyer. She will have filed charges by tomorrow afternoon. By law We must allow you 48 hours to remove the offending material. If not, you will be charged with defamation of character, libel, and criminal mischief, all misdemeanors. You will face a judge trial.

Don’t think you won’t be found either. That email with the cap also includes your Dox, which will not be shared publicly. I’ve also forwarded this material to the local FBI field office. They take false accusations of pedophilia VERY seriously. Especially when your uncle is a high ranking Homicide Detective with good friends in the FBI, the US Marshals Office, and the NSA. 

can we turn this into a copy pasta

Do you people not understand how the law works?

i am you

scree.n  cappe d .and emaiedl  t o; my, lawye.r  SShe wil,,l have ;filed chagres by omor;rwo af.ternoo;n. By la w We ,,mus,t allooW you 48 hoursto re;;mo,ve the offenddin;;g maetrial., Itff not, you will be charged with defamaat  in of character, lbel, and, crim jusstina,,l mischief, ll misdemeanors. You ,,will  face ,,a judge trriial.

Don’’t ttHi nk yo.u won;;’t bee;; found either. Th;;at eemail wituht hhe ca also incldues your ox,’ whiCh will n,ot be s,,hared, public,,ly. I’vve alsoo f,,orwarded this materil..a  to the looc al F,,B IIfi,eld  offic;e. TjheY take fals..e accusati ons;; of  pedpohilia VERY,, ser;;iouusly. E;;specially when yyouru ncle is ca, h,,hiigh ranking Homicidd..e Detec;t;ive with good fr..ie,,nsd in ,,tdhe     BI,; hte U Sarshals Off,,i..cE,,,, and,, the NNSA.

screencapped 📸 👏 and emailed 📬📤to my lawyer 🤓🤓. She will have filed charges 📒😤 by tomorrow 🌞afternoon . By law We must allow you 48 ⏰😴hours to remove 🙅🙅the 😡offending material😡. If not🙄, you will be charged 😱😭with defamation of character😵, libel😩, and criminal mischief😤, all misdemeanors😳😳😳. You will face a judge🏦 trial.
Don’t think you won’t🔍👏be 🔍👏found 🔍👏either. That email with the cap also includes your Dox😱, which will 🙅not🙅be shared publicly☠️. I’ve also forwarded 📤this material to the local 😈FBI😈 field office. They take false accusations 😤of 🤢😨pedophilia 🤔VERY seriously🤔. Especially when your uncle is a ⬆️⬆️high ranking 🔪Homicide Detective🔫 with good friends 👌👩‍❤️‍👩in the 🚧FBI🚧the 🇱🇷US Marshals 🇱🇷Office, and the 💣NSA💣.

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tinyplanetxplorer·3 years agoText



if you catch and fight the UPS guy and win you get to keep all the packages in the truck

If you lose you become the UPS guy and the guy you fought can return to his family at last

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