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typhlosionismyshit · 12 days
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i think the reason why the assassination of Julius Caesar is one of the funniest political assassinations is for this very simple reason:
1 guy stabs 1 guy: not funny. that's murder.
2 guys stab 1 guy: even less funny. that's two against one.
60 guys stab 1 guy: uproariously funny. why do you need so many guys.
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typhlosionismyshit · 12 days
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i think the reason why the assassination of Julius Caesar is one of the funniest political assassinations is for this very simple reason:
1 guy stabs 1 guy: not funny. that's murder.
2 guys stab 1 guy: even less funny. that's two against one.
60 guys stab 1 guy: uproariously funny. why do you need so many guys.
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typhlosionismyshit · 12 days
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"When life gives you lemons" FALSE LEMONS ARE A HYBRID OF A BITTER ORANGE AND A CITRON, MEANING WE GAVE OURSELVES LEMONS
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typhlosionismyshit · 13 days
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when i was 5 i wanted to watch The Lion King every day but i would cry miserably about Mufasa every time, and when my mom would try to comfort me i'd get embarrassed and tell her i wasn't crying, my eyes just hurt, and she'd be like "your eyes always seem to hurt at this part" and i was like "yes...because of my mysterious disease..."
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typhlosionismyshit · 13 days
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ppl in the age of cell phones: fucking up their necks
ppl in the age of books: fucking up their necks
ppl in the age of textile art: fucking up their necks
ppl in the age of picking lice: fucking up their necks
ppl in the age of cooking: fucking up their necks
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typhlosionismyshit · 13 days
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Excuse me? Is that a Sterek reference in my Deadpool!?! I cackled so hard. (Deadpool #7)
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typhlosionismyshit · 13 days
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trout reznor (trent reznor if he was a fish): my whole existence is cod
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typhlosionismyshit · 13 days
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typhlosionismyshit · 13 days
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♰ 𝐎𝐡𝐥𝐬𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐟 𝐂𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐲 ♰ | 𝐇𝐚𝐦𝐛𝐮𝐫𝐠, 𝐆𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐲
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typhlosionismyshit · 13 days
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Pros of being a Fandom Old: - never have to worry about my mom finding out about my porn fic - have seen it all before and give few if any fucks
Cons of being a Fandom Old: - forced to work at actual job instead of writing fic all day - have seen it all before and get regular “ugh not again” moments
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typhlosionismyshit · 13 days
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Don't you think you owe it to readers to give them what they want?
No? What an odd take. Read my fic or don't.
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typhlosionismyshit · 13 days
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Stiles: Does this shirt make me look fat?
Derek: It makes my dick look fat.
Stiles: I can never talk to you.
Derek: It's getting fatter.
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typhlosionismyshit · 13 days
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typhlosionismyshit · 13 days
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typhlosionismyshit · 13 days
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pink shiny pokemon ★☆
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typhlosionismyshit · 14 days
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okay...
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typhlosionismyshit · 14 days
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one of these days viola davis is gonna snap and just fucking clock him
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