typicallyscorpio

[typicallyscorpio]

my existence is a scandal

[typicallyscorpio]

— Emily Dickinson, from a letter to Abiah Root (August 1851)

[typicallyscorpio]

There'll be a moment when you realise you're 27 when yesterday you were just 17; and you wouldn't be able to tell how a decade passed away and your life got divided into before and afters. The fury of youth will subdue and nothing will really change but everything will feel different when you look at old photographs and blurry videos taken on cheap mobile phones. Scents will remind you of childhood and certain friends you don't talk to anymore, hangouts will become reunions and mom's burnt pie will become the best food you ever had. And I know on some days you won't be able to show anything of those 10 years but I hope you remember to breathe, and let go of the knot in your chest. I hope you go out in the sun and live a little, because tomorrow is 37.

Edit- I added the visualizer for this piece on my YT, check it out here

-Ritika Jyala, excerpt from The Flesh I Burned

[typicallyscorpio]

I think I’ve never had a true romantic interest before, someone who stops my heart and starts my stuttering, someone who I can’t wait to see. All I’ve had are half-made crushes on any decent human being because I’m so in love with the idea of being in love that I start projecting unto others and I feel like I’ll never find it.

[typicallyscorpio]

He asked me when I fell in love with him and I knew it sounded dramatic to say the moment I saw him, so I told him this story of my grandma who had Alzheimer's- she forgot her name and the words for fruit and food, she forgot her address and how to use the washroom, all her life lost to the disease. The only thing she remembered was her son's name and when that began to fade, the one thing she always remembered was that she loved him, even in illness, even in insanity. She saw this 6 foot 2 man with a scrubby beard and she didn't know him but she said she trusted him, she asked him to hold her hand when she died. When does memory end and love begin? All I know is- she loved him before she remembered him.

-Ritika Jyala, excerpt from The world is a sphere of ice and our hands are made of fire

[typicallyscorpio]

The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath.

I’ve recently saw this one trending, and it’s one that i’ve always resonated with.

[typicallyscorpio]

[typicallyscorpio]

You have to steal time as a poet. You have to write poetry while you’re going to meetings and teaching five classes and crying at Nowhere Bar about some rejection again. The trick is not to feel sorry for yourself. The other trick is to resist everything that’s in vogue. To not be understood by critics. To not join schools or movements. To make what you want and explain nothing.

- Alex Dimitrov (Poem written in a Cab)

[typicallyscorpio]

never let anyone tell u how many commas can go in a sentence, u measure that shit with ur heart

[typicallyscorpio]

"The joy of writing.

A chance to make things stay.

A revenge of a mortal hand. "

[typicallyscorpio]

On the train we swapped seats, you wanted the window and I wanted to look at you.

في القطار تبادلنا المقاعد ، كنتِ تريدين النافذة وكنتُ أريد أن أطل عليكِ

- Mahmoud Darwish

[typicallyscorpio]

don’t do anything for social media. don’t let it affect your media consumption too much. or how you spend your time. or how you see yourself. don’t watch a tv show you won’t enjoy just to post about it, don’t buy a pair of jeans you don’t really like because it’s a trend, don’t become a spokesperson for ideologies you haven’t truly read and thought about first yourself. operate as though you don’t have a social media whenever you’re not using social media. this is what stops it from seeping over the borders of the time you give it into the rest of your life. let your real life influence what you choose to do with your time more.

[typicallyscorpio]

Emily Henry / Henry H / Matty Healy / Taylor Swift / Madeline Miller

[typicallyscorpio]

"I was always hungry for love. Just once, I wanted to know what it was like to get my fill of it - to be fed so much love I couldn't take any more. Just once."

- Haruki Murakami

(starting the month as a hopeless romantic? Hell yes.

Happy November to all )

[typicallyscorpio]

all i can do is swallow my questions and leave her to her fire

[typicallyscorpio]

[typicallyscorpio]

Why Zarry?

Zayn had nudes of Harry on his phone. He accidentally tweeted it once with the caption “Enjoying my view ;)” but took it down. The pic is still on the internet, it’s not that hard to find. And he also said that he accidentally sent a nude of Harry to a group message of 6 people. They also used to post joking-lovey shit about each other on twitter too, like comfortable “bromancey” stuff that you only do when you really click with someone. 

Probably the most convincing thing about Zarry is the fact that even though Zayn and Harry were super close, as much if not more than they were with the other boys, when Zayn left he said in an interview “I never spoke to Harry even while I was in the band, so I never expected much of a relationship with him”. I think til this day, they have never cleared up in any interview whether or not they actually talk to each other, and I think Harry only started following Zayn’s twitter again in 2017 (Zayn left 2015). Even Liam was confused and said he was never aware that Zayn and Harry were never friends.

 This basically means Zayn is straight up saying bullshit lol. Why exactly would he (kind of vehemently) deny a relationship, even if it was only a bromance, if he wasn’t bitter about something? And if they were “never close” how could you even be THAT bitter about something to the point that you’re trying to deny that you ever had a relationship to begin with? The fact that he’s lying speaks volumes. Zayn first got in touch with Liam, Niall shook his hand at music award (he kind of wasn’t expecting it and was shook) and they’re okay now, and Louis’ late mom kind of forced both of them to reconcile because it was her last wish. Literally the only person that’s up in the air is Harry, and NO ONE has anything bad to say about Harry (except tswift but she’s irrelevant). Zayn is the only other person ever that I know of who has come close to shading Harry in a weird apathetic way. No one knows why, no one asks them why.

 There’s a lot more stuff though (like A LOT) and it’s still going tbh. Like 2017, before Harry’s tour, he was promoting his album. He blanked out his instagram and posted 3 empty squares on March 25 (exact same date Zayn left the band and released his official statement that he’s quitting). Back in 2016, Zayn did THE EXACT SAME THING when he released his album (blank instagram, 3 empty squares, on March 25). After Harry did this, Harry posted a teaser of him walking out through a smoke screen, and ON THE NEXT DAY I swear to god, I’m not making this up, Zayn tweets “Clouded in your love, but I’ll follow it”. They did this during a time where they were supposedly NOT talking to each other. 

To add to this, Harry’s songs are so fucking… omfg almost every song on his album relates to his relationship with Zayn in some way, like its all about sad, bittersweet love, sexual experimentation, losing someone, not communicating enough in a relationship, having arguments. And small aside, Harry has never had a serious girlfriend that we know of so idek where all this sad, hurt boy persona is coming from if you’re looking at his “girlfriend” track record. And he’s been writing songs like this since Zayn left the band (listen to If I Could Fly). He chose to cover this song called “Girl Crush”. It’s about a girl, who has a crush on another girl, who took her man away from her. The lyrics are like “I want to taste her lips cause she tastes like you”, “I want her long blonde hair, I want her magic touch, so maybe then, you’d love me just as much”, he uses female pronouns, and Zayn has been dating blondes (Perrie and Gigi). 

Harry also wrote his own song which he says is “the most honest song on his album” called From The Dining Table, and in this song he’s crooning over some lost significant other, the lyrics are like “We haven’t spoke since you went away, comfortable silence is so overrated” and “Woke up to a girl who looked just like you, I almost said your name”. Harry was dating Kendall at the time.

This isn’t even the tip of the iceberg. If you want to ruin your life over IRL pinning, get into Zarry lol. I don’t ship real people, and even when I do, I’m always conscious of the fact that they’re not actually in a relationship and I only ship for fun and aesthetic. But JFC Zarry makes it really hard to think that way when there is literally too many coincidences. It’s also worth mentioning that Zayn’s songs also parallel Harry’s. Harry’s motif is always “call me pls, I miss you” (He sings 1D songs in his concerts and he actually said “I miss you” on his tour after singing Zayn’s part) and Zayn’s lyrics are all over the place, but a couple of his songs have “I wanted to call, but I didn’t” (Too Much ft Timbaland, it’s recent) and they both have this weird “affair and cheating, I’m addicted to you” theme thing going on. Harry’s is more “I want u, I want u”, Zayn’s is more “I want u, but I cant have you, I dont know what I want, life is hard”. 

(Copied from a youtube comment)