ultimate-whovian

[ultimate-whovian]

Me: “I can’t be autistic, I don’t have sensory issues.”

Also Me-

- The person who told me to try freezing grapes is my enemy.

- *Physically gagging from trying to eat a freeze dried strawberry*

- “I can’t sleep, my shirt is on.”

- This yogurt had pieces of fruit in it so I will let it spoil in the back of my fridge and die of starvation before I eat it.

- If anyone touches me right now I will become a safety hazard

- *Throwing myself off of furniture*

- Something is crinkling SOMEWHERE in the next room and if I don’t find it and destroy it I will never sleep again.

- This person’s headlights were too bright for 0.5 seconds and now I will have a migraine for the next 4 hours.

- My hands are wet MY HANDS ARE WET MAKE IT STOP

- What do you mean these clothes are dry? They’re clearly still damp, how do you not feel it? They’re still damp!

- These two rocks rubbed against each other and made a noise and I think I may have broken a tooth from clenching my jaw so hard

- If I am forced to wear jeans for more than 0.3 seconds upon entering my home I’m going to start crying

Feel free to add your own

[ultimate-whovian]

typical magical girl series but the female protagonists are allowed to just straight up murder people. is that asking so much

[ultimate-whovian]

no thoughts. only them

[ultimate-whovian]

teal and orange truly is the greatest color combo in the world. like name one better combo

[ultimate-whovian]

We walked into the hallway to get to our hotel room and I lost it laughing

[ultimate-whovian]

Prisoner zero has escaped😳

#funny #funny pictures #doctor who #funny pics #dw #the doctor #doctor who fandom #doctor who funny #doctor who season 11 #eleventh hour

[ultimate-whovian]

[ultimate-whovian]

why did you even do that asshole

[ultimate-whovian]

#funny #funny pictures #lord of the rings #lord of the rings funny #gollum #smeagol #the one ring #lotr #lotr funny

[ultimate-whovian]

Why is this heat so hot 😩

[ultimate-whovian]

*petting my cat* please cure my depression cat: *prrbhbphr* me: thanks

[ultimate-whovian]

[ultimate-whovian]

[ultimate-whovian]

Everyone shut up and look at Lala.

[ultimate-whovian]

I read an AITA post a few weeks back about a woman who liked having snacks in the bath when she's had a long day (a result of residual trauma iirc - the bath was her safe space). Her brand new husband of three weeks, a man twice her age who had no job, made her pay all of his bills and do all housework, and spent all day every day gaming because he wanted to make it as a Twitch streamer, had always been fine with this; but, on the day in question, had whisked her bath snacks out of her hands as she was on her way to the bathroom and tried to bin them, telling her it was time to 'break her of that filthy habit in his home'. She told him if he ever actually paid anything towards the house she owns outright he might get a say, took her snacks back, and had her lovely bath. He was since giving her the silent treatment.

(Obviously the judgement was an avalanche of 'NTA and also he's abusing you', which she agreed with, and decided to kick him out, so happy ending.)

Anyway I told my husband about this and he was outraged. "I would never do that!" he told me, furious. "I would find it adorable if you had bath snacks!"

Since then, every time I try to have a bath (which I only do as a rare treat) after about ten minutes there has been an anxious scrabbling at the bathroom door.

"Elanor!" he says. "Do you have bath snacks? Do you need anything?"

My answer is irrelevant. He brings me wine and poptarts. Now I have bath snacks. I'm a bath snacks person. Last time he was literally sleeping on the sofa when I went for the bath. Somehow this still happened. I now have an eager bathroom butler. How did this happen. I have never been so decadent yet bewildered.

[ultimate-whovian]

hey, uh. what the shit

[ultimate-whovian]