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“I don’t care about dumb weed jokes,” I said naively, before I saw this

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happy neil banging out the tunes day!

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Neil Banged out his tunes today, on a train you have the comfort and relaxation to bang out your own tunes

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Ok this slaaaaaaaps

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I want to thank my laggy computer for this glitch:

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my friend was testing perfumes out at the store and she sniffed a bottle and anounced "ngl this bitch kind of sucks" The girl at the counter suddenly looked really sad, and my friend was like "I'm sorry, I wasn't talking about you." And the girl looked up and said "No don't worry, I didn't think that, but I just crushed a ladybug with my shoe" We both took a peak over the counter. she'd stepped on a red m&m

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You are not in a timeloop you are b12 deficient

#GIRL

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Not my silent ass looking for a hill

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FACT: you get special dialogue for pooping yourself

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You need.. you need to unmute…

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the default way for things to taste is good. we know this because "tasty" means something tastes good. conversely, from the words "smelly" and "noisy" we can conclude that the default way for things to smell and sound is bad. interestingly there are no corresponding adjectives for the senses of sight and touch. the inescapable conclusion is that the most ordinary object possible is invisible and intangible, produces a hideous cacophony, smells terrible, but tastes delicious. and yet this description matches no object or phenomenon known to science or human experience. so what the fuck

#straight up because of this post #i just learned sightly is a positive thing #i always thought it meant ugly #and it's synonymous with comely #which i ALSO thought was ugly