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me in planning stages of writing: this fucks. this is gonna be so fun.

me the minute i sit down to write: language is an unwieldy cudgel we use to beat the human experience to death in an attempt at ever communicating fully with another being. i wish intelligent life had never evolved. i want to go back to the cell stage like in spore

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"slut era" i whisper as i lay motionless on my living room floor complaining about sherlock holmes solving every mystery in london before me for the 5th night in a row

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trying to become sherlock holmes isn't enough i need to break into his flat, steal his client, and potentially get a woman hanged for a crime she didn't commit

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From the notepad of Hampton Fawx

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the sexual tension between my friend group trying (and failing) to be detectives in victorian london and the other more famous detective team that doesn't know we exist

#224bbaker

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I think we can all aspire to be as confident in a new environment as Clara Entwhistle. She's only just arrived in Even Greater London, she's barely been a journalist for 24 hours, and she's already boasting to a seasoned detective about "the knack I have for ferreting things out" and declaring that she is in "the game of truth".

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INTRODUCING: Inspector Archibald Cartwright 🔎

Perhaps having your boyfriend show up to bail his best friend/detective partner out of jail on your first day as an Inspector isn't the best look, but Archie knows how to pivot!

Meet Archie, and the rest of the cast, in Chapter One: The Case of the Best Case Scenario, now available--and subscribe now to hear more of him when the rest of the season releases, starting on October 24th!

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if I were sherlock holmes I would have simply had sex with john watson already. coward.

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More women going fucking feral in audio dramas. I just think they’re neat

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You know what Holmes adaptation we actually need? One where the whole thing is told from the POV of their fucking neighbours. What kind of out of context bullshit do these people see and hear in their day to day lives, because you know these men are the most annoying fucking people you could ever live near

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This is a Georgie Crusoe appreciation post. She's awesome. She can do anything. Coffins, carousels, giant mechanical cranes. She loves her Nana. She has The Brain Cell. She's ready to throw hands. She'll preemptively break up with Eric Chapman, well known to be the most charming person on Piffling. She thinks movies are only good if they have fight scenes or car chases. She can handle Rudyard as a boss. She can run the island's government. She has every single skill ever, and if Piffling Vale ever got involved in a space race (obviously this would be as a result of Desmond Desmond trying to grow Piffling into a Town), she's be building the rocket, the spacesuit, the launch center, and then landing on the moon herself and terraforming it while the rest of the island squabbled. I love her.

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Running an indie audio drama means you can (and should, nay, MUST) write a silly little bio for your cat on your website since he is technically a member of the cast.

Credit your actors!

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Meet the Characters of Fawx & Stallion!

Our second episode releases TOMORROW, so there's no better time to get acquainted with the cast of characters!

THE DETECTIVES

HAMPTON FAWX (Jeremy Thompson). Detective. And gentleman. Our Sherlock Holmes figure (but not really). Resident of 224B Baker St, Hampton moved to London after some success as a kid detective in his small town, and was immediately caught in the shadow of Holmes's meteoric rise. James's partner (of the detective variety)

JAMES STALLION (Chris Vizurraga). Gentleman. And detective. Our John Watson figure (but not really). Other resident of 224B Baker St, James moved to London and was immediately hit by a city carriage, for which he sued for an exorbitant fee & has lived a life of luxury ever since.

MADGE STALLION (Katie McLean Hainsworth): Neither gentlemen nor detective. The third resident of 224B Baker. Hampton's childhood friend and James's wife (if you want to get technical about it). Just got dumped by her girlfriend and is about to make it everyone's problem.

ARCHIE CARTWRIGHT (Shawn Pfautsch): Our Lestrade figure but not really. Just got promoted and already regretting it. Exhausted, trying his best, and doing an ok job at growing in a moustache James will eventually find attractive. James's partner (of the non-detective variety)

THE CLIENTS

SARAH FLETCHLEY (Lauren Grace Thompson): Originally intending to visit Holmes & Watson, but finding them out of town, Sarah must reluctantly depend on our titular heroes to help clear her mother's name of a crime she didn't commit...

JONATHAN CRIMERIA (Tommy Malouf): Only son of the second-richest family in London, Jonathan is reeling from the sudden, simultaneous death of his parents and, even more so, the recent theft of their prized Family Jewels...

(SOME OF) THE SUSPECTS

OSKAR DE GUICHE (Mike Ooi): Personal bodyguard of Jonathan Crimeria. Oddly stealthy for a man of such imposing stature. A man of few words and many secrets, including where he was the night of the robbery..

FURINA SAZARAC (Tina Muñoz Pandya): The long-standing accountant for The Crimeria Estate. Wound so tight she's made three masseuses quit on the spot. A woman with so many family secrets running through her head, one more for herself would hardly shake her...

CATALINA MONTGOMERY SCHNUTZ (Corrbette Pasko): A figurehead of the London underworld, but with the polished veneer of a respectable gentlemen's club owner. She'll do anything to gain leverage over Londoners of all social strata...anything at all...

KATE TAYLOR (Jess Ridenour): A maid in the Crimeria Estate and friend to Eliza Fletchley, the accused. Often overlooked, underpaid, and berated, Kate is looking to get out of her dead-end job, whatever the cost...

Episode two is available tomorrow, October 24th, so if you haven't listened to episode one yet, now is a perfect time!

#224bbaker

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#224bbaker #madge stallion

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every victorian friend group needs

a Sherlock Holmes cosplayer (derogatory)

a chill gay investor who got rich from nothing by throwing himself in front of a carriage and subsequently suing the city of London

said investor's incredibly mean lesbian wife who's going through a breakup with her girlfriend for the 12th time this month and is about to make it your problem too

the only man in London who can power through 2 hours of sleep a night on average without doing cocaine in the 1880s (and is miserable because of it)

a, to be clear, SUPER fucking old cat

#224bbaker

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2022 Canon Aspec Fiction Podcast Character Spreadsheet

65+ shows, 90+ characters, additions ongoing.

Ace week might be over, and aro some months away, but representation is always important.

Feedback, questions, and additions are always welcome.

Want to add an entry, or complete one in the "Pending" tab? Send me the information, I'll add it and credit you.

Want any additional information? Let me know.

Is anything incorrect? Let me know.

Want to link this elsewhere? Go for it.

The 2021 version (Tumblr Post) can be found Here

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We are back on Monday, November 7th with Chapter 3: The Case of the Ticking Clock. With James off on a pre-arranged date night with Archie, Hampton and Madge are left to their own devices to get the investigation rolling, first with a trip to the scene of the crime...

#224bbaker