I want to apologize about the other night In the car.
How I was wishy washy about my feelings and possibly not making sense at one point..
But I’m going to do things right, I respect your feelings.
I’m going to stop liking you; I know I said it might take a while.
But I hope you’ll treat me like you always do.
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Closed Doors
The truth is,
I don't think you'll ever understand the extent of what I felt for you.
Or what I'd have done for you,
and I hate that you never gave yourself the chance to let me show you.
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"You being alive is someone's reason to keep going."
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Take care of the people you love,
without expecting a reward for being a giving and caring person.
Otherwise you will end up living in your big beautiful house,
Alone.
Unknowingly homeless.
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"Use my chest to rest your head,
I swear i'll never move again."
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Nothing compares to the hole that I feel
when it hits me again that I can't make you happy,
and even my everything will not fulfill you.
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"He falls asleep whispering sweet nothings into my neck.
If his words left their mark, I'd have no blank space left."
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"I try to be poetic.
I try to come up with beautiful words and make them mean something,
... for you."
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It was wrong of me
to think that this was special,
when I wasn't the only one.
I don't know what I thought would come out of this.
I should've known that everything you said meant nothing to you
when it meant everything to me.
I never would've gotten involved had I known you were thinking and saying the same words to someone else.
This was a game I didn't agree to play.
I was never going to compete for your attention or love.
And you tried to keep it a secret,
as if I wasn't smart enough to figure it out.
That's the cruel part.
Making me think I was the only one at fault,
When you were simply spinning your wheel of choice.
I was a fool.
Unknowingly waiting for you to choose between me,
and other women with the same dazed eyes.
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imagining moving in with a lover and mixing my books with their books in our bookshelves... might faint
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source
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I was so excited that I immediately painted this. How can this man be so sexy🤤
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you tell me to quiet down cause
my opinions make me less beautiful
but I was not made with a fire in my belly
so I could be put out
I was not made with a lightness on my tongue
so I could be easy to swallow
I was made heavy
half blade and half silk
difficult to forget and not easy
for the mind to follow
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Trying to convince myself
I am allowed
to take up space
is like writing with
my left hand
when I was born
to use my right
- the idea of shrinking is hereditary
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I think you might be
the death of me.
And it's as if I'm running
at full speed
towards my grave.
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In the beginning
I always felt like
my loving you was
an inconvenience
to your world.
But maybe
the only real inconvenience
was me forcing your hand
into feeling something
that you weren't ready for.
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Brush me off.
I dare you.
That way
in time,
when you see I was right,
you'll feel a sting
on your shoulder
where I once was.
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