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can you imagine someone turning off the lights so the birthday whoever can blow out the candles and out of the corner Patrick just whispers “be careful making wishes in the dark dark”

svetsy

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OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE ONE OF THOSE INSTANT OATMEALS GONE HORRIBLY WRONG AND GORDON RAMSAY JUST YELLING AT WHOEVER MADE THIS "THIS ISN'T OATMEAL! DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS?!" "n-no sir." "IT'S NOT OATS, IT'S NOT POTATOES, IT'S FUCKING APOTOATS! SEE YO UMADE ME INVENT A FUCKING NEW WORD!"

Svetsy on "APOTOATS"

#svenguin

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i can’t stop potatoeing people

svetsy

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shall i compare tea to a summer’s day? it is more lovely and more temperate. rough hands do shake the cinnamon in thee, and tasteful leaves hath all too short a date. sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines, and often do i make myself iced tea; but every leaf from leaf sometime declines, by chance, or nature’s changing course, unbrewed; but thy eternal tea leaves shall not fade, nor lose possession of that fair thou ow’st, nor shall death brag thou wand’rest in his shade, when in eternal lines the tea doth grow. So long as men can breathe, or eyes can see, So long lives this, and this gives life to tea.

-svetsy

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it’s dark you’re on your way home the streets are deserted, and you pass some alleys as you go along when you get to a corner with a broken streetlamp you pause, and you hear growling then out of the corner of your eye you see it you don’t know what it is, but you can see it stir it lumbers toward you slowly, and something glistens off its back suddenly it lunges toward you in a decaying mess of flesh, fur, and cactus there is no escape. your screams pierce the night as you run from the zombie awkwombat stepcactus.

-svetsy

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I'm not even sorry