How messed up is it that I wish, more than anything, that Joy was real? To forget the Bad Stuff? To forget Pain? To be so blitzed out of your mind, you don't feel anything but chemically induced Joy. It would be better than feeling so hollow, so miserable day in and day out. I curse each breath I take. I've cried so much that tears no longer fall. Is my purpose in this world to only be hurt by people I care about? What kind of life is that?
I...don't want to be here anymore.
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