whitegirlrevert

[whitegirlrevert]

Status quo & existing as the “other” within muslim communities

The past few years I have been reflecting on the existence of reverts in our muslim communities. I study away from home and find it interesting that in my circumstance, where the population is, in general, more white, there is a much greater amount of reverts. I remember walking into a pet store one day and one of the staff members was a white hijabi sister. I introduced myself and she told me her name was Crystal. CRYSTAL! That’s the last kind of name I would have expected to belong to a revert. No less working in a pet store, where DOGS frequent. Another very white revert at the local masjid I attend was full on reading the Qur’an in arabic. I exclaimed surprise to another sister and she told me this sister had been a revert for 5 years. When I finally spoke to the Qur’an reading sister, she calmly replied “actually 4 years”. These instances highlighted assumptions about being an “other” within the muslim community. For example, other muslims often assume that if I am not practicing something that I am ignorant rather than recognizing that I simply disagree with that male-oriented interpretation of my faith. One example of this, is when I choose to wear nail polish and pray. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this, it is generally accepted in the muslim community that one cannot pray wearing nail polish because they are unable to get water to hit their nail when performing the ritual pre-prayer washing, wudu. I have read arguments for and against as well as the authorities and I don’t accept this as a requirement. Unfortunately, if I am wearing nail polish at the masjid I am constantly nervous for the point in time when a sister will semi-patronizingly tell me, “sister…we don’t pray wearing nail polish”.

Another such assumption concerns the fard (mandatory requirement) of wearing hijab. Once again, I have thoroughly done my research on the matter and while I am not writing off the concept for all time, I have trouble accepting that it is fard. When I initially converted to Islam I often was told, “Just take things slow, consistency is key. You don’t need to start wearing hijab right away.” I hadn’t even learned how to pray yet, so I was not sure how covering my head could be a priority. This same statement was repeated time and time again. Finally, a group of sisters provided me with a new-muslim care package (which always includes some type of scarf for women) but prefaced the gift by stating that the scarves were “to pray in” (rather than wearing on a daily basis).

When you go outside culturally muslim communities there is often less of an assumption that the status quo is required. I feel most comfortable in spaces where there is an acknowledgement of the inherent interpretation of the Qur’an and sunnah as texts. In particular, that interpretation of Islamic texts has largely been done by men, for men. This is not unique to Islam, other religious communities face similar hurdles. The Qur’an does not teach us to accept things unquestioningly. While I by no means consider myself an Islamic scholar, I do question the source of our guidance. When a majority of “authentic” scholars are men practicing wahabbist interpretations of Islam, it really begs the question, “what interpretation of Islam is authentic?”

#islam #muslim #revert #convert #conversion #othering

[whitegirlrevert]

Questions to a revert about muslim experiences in a non-muslim country

*written about 3 years ago*

I grew up in a very diverse city, a suburb in Canada, but there weren’t a lot of muslims around. I obviously knew muslims and would and ask them questions. I always had some deep interest in the religion. I never really know why I was interested, but I was. I read many books about Islam. 

Not just “this is what Islam teaches” but also books from muslim women that spoke about their personal experience of Islam. This taught me that there was so much depth to the religion and I wanted to learn more.

What do you know about it?

This is a difficult question to answer because, well, I know a lot. I will perhaps speak to what I like most about Islam.

Before I reverted to Islam, I liked how every question has a rational answer in Islam. I liked how concepts such as hijab are more meaningful than what the west perceives on the surface. I liked how women were given rights in Islam that were unprecedented for their time. I liked how women and mothers are respected and honoured in Islam (although culturally they may not be).

After I reverted to Islam, I fell in love with salah. Alhamdullilah I cannot begin to describe to you how much peace and sabr salah brings me. I think it has been one of the greatest blessings of my life. Sometimes I cannot wait for salah I am so excited to pray. Five times a day I am forced to re-prioritize my life and to stop what I’m doing and take a break from this dunya. Also, I have become more conscious about back-biting and speaking about other people only with the best of intentions. Islam has also brought me more sabr towards other people. When someone makes me angry, I usually now stop and think about what is the appropriate way to respond, particularly as a Muslim.

1. How did you become Muslim?

In July, 2016 I took my shahada at Eid al Fitr prayers. I did it quite privately with a muslim friend who was my witness. I didn’t want it to be a big deal like in front of hundreds of people shouting takbeer, I wanted it to just be about me and my God. Why after 8 years did I decide to become muslim? I realized that every muslim has their own journey with God. That there are different ways of following Islam. That there will always be debates between people about which is the correct way. All we can do is educate ourselves and approach our religion with the best of intentions insha’Allah.

2. How much time did it take for you to make such a decision?

It took me about 8 years. For me it was a really long journey which still continues.

3. What was the impact of the decision on you friends and family?

Most of my family doesn’t know about my decision. When my parents found out, alhamdullilah, they were very supportive. I expected it would be a huge problem because over the 8 years that I had been interested in Islam, they always told me, “don’t become muslim”. I come from a very conservative community of first-generation Polish immigrants. It’s almost unperceivable to my community that a Polish female would become muslim. But I stopped caring; at the end of the day it’s about what brings me peace not what people, who are already racist, think about me.

 4. What is the message you want to deliver for the non-muslims?

Your life would be so much more fulfilling if you learned about the experiences of people who are “different from you”. There is a whole other perspective on the world which is equally as valid, useful, and valuable. You are missing a lot in life by only sticking with a group of people who are exactly like you. Also, muslims come in different shapes and sizes. The stereotypical image of a hijabi as the only true muslim woman is outdated. There are people who look like me, that you would never know were muslim, who follow the same faith.

 5. How do non-muslims see Islam in non-muslim countries?

Most people are unfortunately still ignorant about other world views. Even in diverse areas, people will ask me if I’m “Islam”. They don’t even understand the difference between the words Islam and Muslim, what they mean, and when to use them. Non-muslim countries is very broad. I think that in Canada we have it better than in other countries. But since Trump has been elected this has sparked violence in some conservative communities. In general, non-muslims have been supportive. Unfortunately, there seems to be a phenomenon where people care for the 2 weeks after a tragic anti-muslim event, and then they become complacent and no one mentions it anymore. After the brothers were murdered in a mosque by a non-muslim terrorist in Quebec, the police in Halifax stated that “everyone should just go about their daily activities as normal”. In my opinion, that’s really ignorant of the fact that muslims who are visible (ie. wear a hijab or abaya; thobe), or people with brown skin (who people just assume are muslim) can’t just go about their day as normal.

#islam #conversion #muslim #revert #convert #islamaphobia #muslimah

[whitegirlrevert]

Salah line policing.

*this was written pre-covid*

This is a public service announcement to those of you/us who line police before salah. You know who I’m talking about. There’s always that one person who stands and barks orders right before salah, creating havoc.

A little explanation for the non-muslims, salah is the ritual worship prayer, the one you see often in movies where muslims prostrate on the ground, stand up, bend, and do it all over again. When you pray this kind of prayer with other people, you are expected to stand next to each other and form lines or rows of people. The goal is to ensure that there are no gaps between the people standing side by side. I won’t get into the variety of symbolic reasons why this is a thing, but to explain the potential significance of this practice, just know that some Muslims believe that their prayer, or act of worship, won’t “count” if there are gaps in the line. For these Muslims then, getting the line straight and close is a priority for everyone.

Now, I don’t have an issue with straight lines. I don’t have an issue with muslims helping fellow muslims form a straight and tight line. What I do have an issue is with people who take this way too far and start creating an unpleasant environment just prior to salah.

When I am preparing to perform my salah I want quiet, peace, a feeling of harmony and sisterhood. I do not want a grouchy sister practically yelling at everyone else to move around while she herself stands still in her place. Not to mention when you have two of these sisters. On more than one occasion sisters literally pull my arm toward them to ensure that their part of the line is made properly. Then another sister will pull my other arm. My body is not a tug-o-war. This is not ok. I am fed up with this practice. Do you think that God would care more about whether your prayer line is straight than the kind of toxic atmosphere you create for the believers who are praying?

Not to mention that there are various ideas of how to form lines…

I’ll use today’s jummah (friday) prayer as an example. Lady comes in late just at the end of the kuthbah (sermon) so she’s already rushing and frantic. Your problem girl, not mine.

Figuring out where the lines will be formed sometimes gets confusing with mixed perceptions of who is starting the line and who is staying where.

There was space to her right. After some movement of women I tried to fill the gap toward my left side. She stood in one spot and ushered me back over. When I tried to explain she hissed, “it doesn’t matter”. Then she proceeded to randomly move to the line in front of us but at the very far right end. She turned around and glared at the other sisters (some her elders) and demanded angrily, “what no one is going to fill the gap?!”

I felt so angry. First of all, there was no gap. She created a gap next to her when she moved into the front line. Second, I was taught that you fill the lines from the left and not the right so ideally the whole line should move over to the right not fill in extra people from the right. All of this is to say that there are various opinions of how to form lines and therefore you should not be rude to people right before we are praying.

I felt so angry that during my first rakah (cycle) I was seething. It was only until I prayed for her that I started to feel some of the tension melt away. I tried to reflect on what would cause someone to behave in such manner in this kind of setting. Eventually, I came up with an idea that she could have been very stressed, had a lot going on in her day, she came to Friday prayers and now she has to deal with sisters who “don’t care” about whether there’s a gap in the line and she has to do all the work to ‘fix it’.

Whatever her intentions, this comes as a warning. You do not get to come to the masjid (mosque) and spoil the atmosphere for everyone there because of your own issues or beliefs. The masjid is for all of us, not just for you. Let’s remember that as much as ritual and practice can be helpful, it becomes detrimental if it takes away from the core values that we should espouse as believers. Do you really think God cares more about a line gap than you yelling at people in the masjid before prayer…?

#salah #islam #muslim #convert #revert

[whitegirlrevert]

Are reverts adequately supported by other muslims?

Recently, a sister reached out to me and asked whether reverts receive adequate support from other muslims. No. No, we don’t. I am a member of a muslim women’s convert group on Facebook and we often have discussions about how reverts are treated in the ummah.

Here are a few of the characterizations:

The unicorn

I’m going to speak about my personal experience as a white revert. There aren’t many countries with significant white Muslim populations (although they do exist) which adds to the rarity factor.

We are seen as the ultra-pious ones. Bonus points if you have blue eyes. It becomes a fetishization in Muslim communities to be white and Muslim. After every Eid prayer I get a couple marriage proposals from men who know nothing about me other than how I look. The fetishization of white male reverts is also prominent (see ft note) but, in contrast to their female counterparts, this can actually make it harder for them to find a spouse.

Tourage, Mahdi, Performing belief and reviving Islam: Prominent (white male) converts in Muslim revival conventions, 2012, vol 1:2 at 207-226 Intellect Ltd.

One to take advantage of

There are countless stories of religious leaders taking advantage of reverts, particularly female ones. This is both grotesque and unacceptable. What’s even more disgusting is that we as a community prefer to unconditionally support these “religious leaders” rather than believe the victims. This is aggravated by the low support that reverts receive from other Muslims. Imagine finally working up the courage to out a religious leader only to be shut down because the alleged perpetrator is part of the establishment. The amount of support for these men – using Islamic themes to give them the benefit of the doubt – is truly discouraging. Islam teaches us to stand with the oppressed not the oppressor.

What does being a woman or being a white woman have to do with her experience of sexual assault being invalidated. Does this mirror existing cultural stereotypes of white woman = slut? How can we pretend that this doesn’t have a negative impact on our later treatment in these conservative circles? This is not to say that women of color don’t experience sexual assault, they certainly do.

Religious leaders hold all the religious knowledge and these sisters feel compelled to stick close to them to gain this knowledge. We need to provide safe spaces for reverts as well as sources for sisters to seek knowledge themselves.

We don’t know anything about Islam

I’ll keep this short. There is a huge difference between communicating information and haram policing. The line between them, however, is not clear.

This becomes especially problematic when you follow a particular madhaab or were taught Islamic practice through culture. Why? Because there may be perfectly legitimate alternative views and interpretations on the issue.

This makes it both confusing for new Muslims and alienates those who disagree with your practice but are made to feel that if they don’t follow your tradition, that they aren’t being a good muslim.

Instead, consider informing them about your view by clarifying that it is from your perception.

No reply to our salaams

A common theme running in discussions with other reverts is that whenever we say our salaams to Muslims we don’t get a reply. It’s like saying hello in a respectful, acknowledging way. Do we not deserve that from you?

Normally, when I bring this up people tell me not to worry and remind me that it is a Muslim’s duty to reply and some version of getting the passerby’s potential blessing in addition to mine. I don’t care. This doesn’t make us feel better.

Some people have hypothesized that these Muslims who don’t reply are simply in shock at hearing a white person say salaam (particularly if, like me, they don’t wear hijab). Others say that they weren’t sure if they misheard me. Regardless of the reasoning, I think the fact that most reverts don’t get a reply is troubling. EVEN if we weren’t Muslim why wouldn’t you reply…? If a non-Muslim is saying salaam to you then they are obviously trying hard to communicate their respect to you. Why would you respond by ignoring this?

One sister from the revert group mentioned that men make excuses about not saying salaam back because they are trying to avoid zina…Ugh. First of all, not supported by hadith. Second, surely you can keep it in your pants for long enough to say the equivalent of hello back. Or are muslim men inherently more fragile than other men? I think not. You can also say salaam back while lowering your gaze. It’s really not that difficult.

Non-Muslims treat us better than other Muslims 

I plan to have a full post on this at some point in the future. This is a bit difficult to explain as I have only recently recognized this irony. Basically, the way I figured this out is that prior to telling a non-muslim about my religious orientation I would preface it by saying, “this is going to be really weird but…” The thing is, they never looked shocked or surprised when I told them. Contrast this to my experience with muslims, and it usually takes them a few minutes and multiple questions to confirm that yes, I am in fact muslim. And you could say it’s the lack  of scarf thing, but honestly if non-muslims can accept that there are muslims who don’t wear hijab than so can you.

It’s really ironic considering that prior to conversion every muslim is all like welcoming and whatnot and then when you convert you almost feel like you need to prove that you are muslim.

I am going to give an example of something that happened to me while I was shopping in a muslim area of Singapore.

I stopped at a shop and asked about this smaller prayer rugs. I told the shop keeper that I am looking for a smaller rug to put my forehead and face on during salah when I am at the masjid for a long time. Literally no idea.

Next store over, I asked this shop keeper about a prayer rug. He, in his sales pitch endeavors said “you can give it to your friend, you can use it yourself”. So I’m thinking, great, this is off to a good start. I continue asking about this rug and am repeatedly using the word salah. He then says, “do you know any muslims?” I replied, “yes, myself”. Then (note the pattern) he says, “you are muslim?!” with a shocked expression.

 To summarize, here are some things Muslims could be doing better to support us. 

Say your salaams back to us.

Believe us when we tell you that a community religious leader has assaulted us.

Stop forcing your particular madhab down our throat.

Don’t assume we know less than you about Islam.

Don’t assume that we are going to whip on a hijab, now or at any point. Focus instead on teaching us how to pray and what to do at a mosque.

Do not tell us that you are making duah for our family to become muslim. I’m not sure how people think this is a great thing, but I personally find it incredibly offensive.

Don’t be mad if we can’t attend Islamic events. Sometimes we are busy, and sometimes we are just dealing with a bit of trauama from negative experiences from the muslim community. We appreciate the invite regardless.

Positive things Muslims do. 

Invite us for iftar, Eid, other Islamic events.

Encourage us by being supportive regardless of whether we share the same views as you islamicly.

Empathize with our challenges.

Motivate us by sending us duahs or ayat.

Make duah for us and our families to have ease.

Instead of saying “In Islam X is forbidden”, try: “most people agree that in Islam X is forbidden”. An excellent example of how this may play out is where a Muslim has an assumption that all reverts will follow the Sunni school and that only the Sunni school is legitimate. This isn’t a Sunni/Shi’a debate, but the very fact that there are conflicting opinions indicates that diversity of opinions exists.

#islam #muslim #revert #convert #muslimah #reflections

[whitegirlrevert]

#freepalestine #free palestine

[whitegirlrevert]

Conversion from Catholicism to Islam – a response

How have you found the conversion from Catholic to Islam. Lots of things in common but I’m sure there are also some pretty big differences. 

*note this is just my experience*

At the end of the day religion is just a way to connect with the divine nature. I don’t see it as black or white. The more you get into any religion the more it starts to bother you because you recognize the inconsistencies between faith and practice.

I believe that you can be a believer in something higher or not. It’s something that’s personal. If at the end of the day, religion doesn’t make you a better person and help you benefit humankind then what is the point? That being said, there are many religious people who do benefit immensely from practicing their faith.

…

Use of reasoning.

What I appreciated with Islam is this notion of logic and rationality being used as an explanation for every single tiny thing. My understanding of this has now developed further and I know that even the ways that we construct religious rules and practice can shift depending on the social underpinnings of the initial “law-makers”. Growing up catholic, (and that may just be my specific upbringing) there were no explanations for anything. Everyone just took their faith as something certain without questioning it. This also still happens among muslims. I think it comes from a fear of questioning, based on a slippery slope concept. Perhaps questioning may lead you to leave the faith, and thus, it must be inspired by the “evil spirit”.

I am almost certain that if I was to continue searching with Catholicism, that I would have found a more intellectual basis for it. But there were just too many aspects of belief that were integral to the faith, and yet I fundamentally disagreed with, that it just didn’t make sense to identify as catholic anymore. It takes a lot of courage to reject something that you were brought up with. Multiple layers of disidentification occur before you can ultimately distance yourself.

Similar to use of reasoning, is having explanations for traditions.

Mass, or the specific traditions involved, was never explained to me. Even if I asked, no one seemed to know. In Islam, however potentially flawed, there is a specific reason for everything, and it’s not merely “well this is how people have been doing it for awhile”. I was never a fan of confession and I appreciate the Islamic principle that humans cannot intercede on your behalf. A similarity among reverts to Islam is their rejection of the concept of a trinity due to their inability to conceptualize it. We were always taught that this is the “truth”, but truth is always a construct. If you don’t have a trinity, then a lot of things about Christianity don’t come together for you anymore. I am not saying that it’s incorrect, just that it’s actually quite a difficult and contested concept, and yet, it has become simplified as if you’re just supposed to take such a theological concept at face value.

Specific rights for women.

If you go back to the New Testament and the Old Testament there aren’t really any explicit rights that women get. So when people question me, why can’t Islam operate how christians treat women. First of all, which christian women? Where do they live? There are christian women in parts of Africa who cohabit in polygynous relationships and have no explicit rights. In these regions, muslim women in polygynous relationships actually report higher marital satisfaction in comparison.

Comparative statements may be true in the sense that muslims should be treating women a different way, but often we mix Islam with muslims. The legal rights that women receive in Islam are very clearly stipulated in the religious text. The same does not occur in the bible. Instead, it’s actually external practice that have shaped the lives of Christian women. Do I think that the notion of Christ’s love and salvation plays a role in this? Absolutely! But we nonetheless have countless examples where women are not treated well in Christian communities. We cannot only look at how much fabric is on a woman’s body and deduce from that what the level of her “oppression” is.

Female religious leaders.

I grew up catholic so that’s a pretty specific ubringing. Many other churches allow women to be much more involved in the church, either as priests/ministers/pastors or other leadership roles. Arguably, the catholic church does not provide these positions. The same can be said of mosques – a woman can’t lead prayer in front of men. They can in front of women, but there are pretty much no opportunities made for women to lead female-led prayer either. It’s just not a priority. There are often religious conferences where they invite a token female scholar or worse, no female scholar to the panel. Sometimes I want to yell, “hey! We exist.”

Also, the struggle to find recitation of God’s word in Arabic by a female is real. It’s ridiculous. If you are a man, and think a woman’s voice will distract you then pick a male reciter! It is very simple. I think the concept of a woman’s voice being sexualized is absolute bullshit personally, and unsupported by both the qur’an and sunnah. This view is something that I’ve always found absolutely shocking, particularly because this is not a christian practice.

Judgement.

I don’t know many people that are catholic and actually know about their religion. Instead, I was exposed to individuals who went to church on Sunday, walked straight out, and made racist comments. My experience of the muslim community, however flawed, is that even if they judge (under the cover of haram policing; aka. “leading you to the truth”) they know that judging other people, backbiting, and slander is not permissible in Islam. This value is something that is fortunately often discussed at religious gatherings, and to me, it represents perhaps more authentic practice. For example, I was once coming back from a religious conference in a car with a sister who literally stopped the discussion in the back of her vehicle about how the religious speaker’s voice could have been improved. That to me, is living out your faith. I had never experienced something like that with christians. One thing that the two religious groups have in common is judging each other’s faiths without truly knowing much about them. Muslims definitely know more about Christianity than christians know about Islam. What they lack, however, is an ability to try to see Christian belief from a Christian perspective.

Connection to the divine. 

1. Prayer.

I used to think, “wow, praying 5 times per day on a set schedule. How tedious!” But I think it’s honestly been my greatest blessings since converting. The prayer itself is actually more of worship mixed in with what we would normally view as “prayer” from a Christian lens. The rhythmicity of it all allows it to be a rather mindful exercise. The “call” to prayer is a reminder to prioritize and of the meaning of the word “Islam” itself (to submit to the will of God). We don’t pray when it’s convenient for us, but rather, because we have devotion to something greater. Obviously, this concept was new for me.

2. Jesus culture.

Jesus culture is what I would define as trying to make religion digestible for youth by making the concept of Jesus into something cool, i.e. “Jesus as pop star”. Growing up Catholic this didn’t really happen, so maybe my commentary is directed to other forms of Christianity. As muslims, we still respect and believe in Jesus as a prophet, but we don’t raise this respect to the level of worship. I find it telling that often when people want to insult muslims and Islam they refer to muslims as Muhmmad worshipers or refer to “our God” as Muhammad (astf). It reveals an identification of a human figure with God. Again, prophets are important to our relationship with God, but ultimately, they are not God. This is a concept called shirk in arabic, and it means equating something with God. This is the ultimate sin in Islam.

That being said, I think Jesus culture assists believers in feeling love toward God. Since their God has become so personified, it’s much easier to feel an emotion like love toward another human being than this higher concept of God. Growing up Christian, you just take Jesus as the son of God/also God as something normal. It’s fine if you want to believe that, but to deny that this concept is not problematic theologically, even from a Jewish perspective, is unfortunate.

3. Arabic.

In Catholocism/Christianity, you don’t need to know a certain language. Learning how to pray (the worship ritual prayers) required me to learn those prayers in arabic. But it really isn’t too different from how one learns to pray Our Father. These words are words that are pre-established for us to get certain meaning across. We can do our own prayers using whatever words or language afterwards, but Our Father is kind of a set prayer. The use of Our Father is very similar to the use of Al Fatihah (the first chapter/first few lines of the quran). Eventually, you pick up on terms and use them without thinking. Part of using arabic is because you can convey concepts that you couldn’t adequately describe by translating them into English. Now I am even learning to read the quran in arabic, which is something that I once assumed was impossible.

4. Ritual

I grew up Catholic so I am used to ritual. Nevertheless, I am not going to lie and say that conversion to another faith that employs ritual is easy. It isn’t. Particularly, if you’re trying to hide this new faith from your family members. All I can say is that youtube is a godsend and focusing on intention rather than correctness is very helpful. I have been thinking about creating how-to guides for new reverts and hosting them here, so hopefully that will be beneficial to followers.

5. Gender division

This has been very upsetting and unsettling for me. I understand the reasoning behind the arguments for it but I still find it hard to accept. Growing up and not being exposed to this culturally has a significant impact on how “normal” you find this. For example, certain synagogues also separate by gender in a similar manner. On the one hand, I appreciate being able to focus without distractions. On the other hand, I have extreme hatred for mosques that have dividers for the women constructed in such a way that does not allow me to see the interior of the building, or perhaps worse, is the equivalent of a tool shed. My ideal space is like a gurdwarah, where the genders are separate but side by side. I know a lot of people argue that more men tend to come to the mosque, therefore, they need more space. But I also wonder whether more women would come to the mosque if there was a comfortable space for them. This absolutely isn’t an issue at every mosque, but it’s enough of a problem that there is even a blog created–Side Entrance–that documents the various women’s mosque entrances and spaces across the world. If I don’t feel comfortable in a religious space, I simply don’t go there again. I don’t need to spend my time feeling angry rather than in peace.

#convert #revert #islam #muslim #catholic #conversion

[whitegirlrevert]

Dear diary, the “ummah” drains me.

I’m going to be honest here. The more I spend time around muslims or in muslim spaces (pre-pandemic) I just feel increasingly more drained. I have a tendency to go on these religious binges where all I do is furiously watch videos, read, speak to other muslims, hang out at the mosque. At the end of it all I abruptly stop because I simply don’t have the energy left.

I go to the mosque or muslim spaces and usually don’t hear about God’s love and mercy, even though almost every chapter of the qur’an starts with that. All I get from other muslims is this fight to be “correct” and patronizing advice giving. The irony of it all, is that if I were to accept their “islam” as Islam, then I would not be muslim. That is not what my conception of a God is.

I question why I put myself in these situations when I know that this is always the outcome. Perhaps it is a reflection of some hope I keep that someone might be different. And sure, from time-to-time I do come across some woke muslim. But most of the time, I go to the mosque, spend my entire time there furious and then leave just feeling angry. 

If I can live my life based on love and forgiveness and not be interrupted by people trying to push their 8th century agenda on me, then why not just do that. My impression of most muslims is a genuinely misprioritization of values. If people spent half as much time minding their own business and looking inwards, as they do haram policing whether people are wearing freaking socks in the masjid, then the world would be a better place. I honestly feel like the people who understand me, and often have the most “islamic values” are often not muslim or religious at all.

#reflections #islam #muslim #frustration #convert #revert #muslimah #haram police

[whitegirlrevert]

#muslim #ramadan #prayer #man #photography #tasbeeh #islam #revert #convert

[whitegirlrevert]

Sunnis shi’a shaming.

One of the most upsetting behaviours I witness amongst muslims is the condemnation and insulting of shi’a muslims. I have no idea why certain sunnis feel at liberty to discuss their opinions about this with me. I don’t want to hear propaganda parroted from some imam or foreign government.

As a revert, everything is relative. So honestly, your version of Islam makes no more sense than their’s does.

Why do you assume that reverts will automatically identify as sunni? I know some who aren’t.

You have no idea whether that individual you are currently speaking to is related in some way to a person who was raised in the shi’a belief (*COUGH* me).

Your opinions REEK of ignorance. You clearly do not have a clue about shi’a belief, nor the concepts underlying those beliefs.

Insulting other muslims and calling them kafir (unbelievers) just makes you look morally unstable. You don’t get to label someone as “non-muslim” based on your interpretation of the religion.

Your inability to grasp how shi’a also follow the Sunnah indicates your ignorance over how hadith was verified and the political underpinnings of deciding which hadith were eventually accepted, including sunni hadith.

 If any of you are in doubt of these occurrences, please go onto youtube, type in shi’a [your choice of noun, verb, adjective] and scroll down to the comments section.

Hold firmly to the rope of Allah all together and do not become divided. Remember the favor of Allah upon you, when you were enemies and he brought your hearts together and you became brothers by his favor.

Surat Ali Imran 3:103

Backstory (one of many):

I was sitting in a grab car with a man who decided to tell me all about how the Iranians who visit (and, you know, spend money supporting Kuala Lumpur’s tourism industry) are shi’a and therefore, “not true muslims”. He proceeded to give me examples of times where he has seen an Iranian engaging in sinful behaviour (because the arabs shaming and insulting white women are not apparently not representative of sunnis). I tried to change the subject and ask where they pray. “Do they have separate mosques then since they are so disliked by sunnis here?” I asked. He laughed and said, almost flippantly, “I don’t know”.

I finally sighed and said, “the man I am marrying is Iranian and he has the most amazing of characters masha’Allah”.

The believers are but brothers, so make reconciliation between your brothers and fear Allah that you may receive mercy.

Surat al-Hujurat 49:10

For the record, the most beautiful salat (prayers) are when I am blessed to perform in in the midst of both sunni and shi’a muslims. It is truly a testament of the faith where people can come together with different interpretations and yet have a commitment to the same belief.

  Generally, sunni’s pray standing with their arms crossed while shi’a pray with their arms at their sides while standing. There are other minor variations during prayer. Notably, all actions are supported by hadith. For more general information about the difference between sunnis and shi’a click here. 

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/in-detail-sunnis-vs-shiites/

#sunni #shia #shi'a #islam #muslim #revert #convert

[whitegirlrevert]

Dear White Friends/People,

Using Websters Dictionary will not help you on definitions of racism, sexism, classism, etc to win an argument. You have never lived nor experienced institutionalized/systemic oppression, so don’t think you can refute those who are, with words from an outdated book written by old white men as your ONLY source. It’s lazy AF. 

Sincerely, 

A black woman irritated with Websters shit.

Submitted by @mysticalcoffeequeen

[whitegirlrevert]

In place of substantive, critical, or coherent refutation of the limitations of Qur’an and Woman, a few have resorted to name calling and character assassinations. The two names most consistently hurled at me are “Western” and “feminist.” “Western” could mean that I can only be who I am: a daughter of the West, born and raised American of African descent. It is reduced however to mean anti-Islam. “Feminist” is used in a similar reductionist manner. No reference is ever made to the definition of feminism as the radical notion that women are human beings. That I never refer to myself with this title—no matter what definition—does not prevent others from calling me out of my name—whether positively or negatively applied, as though I do not count as a human being.

Amina Wadud, “Qur’an and Women”

#quran #women #muslimah #muslim #islam #feminist #feminism #amina wadud

[whitegirlrevert]

If denying your prayers was his intent,

Why would he bring you on the prayer mat?

[whitegirlrevert]

Open Mushaf on Prayer Mat

Source: alnoofa, via IslamicArtDB

[whitegirlrevert]

I used to think that “Islam” and “Muslim” were one and the same, with the goal of all Muslims to be in (Islam:) a state of engaged surrender to Allah: the One, the Originator of all things. Following the publication of Qur’an and Woman, I have seen that situations may arise where one might be forced to choose between the two. To choose Muslim would mean a place for me and my children within the growing communities of Muslims worldwide. It would mean peaceful greetings and warm embraces. It would mean access to much needed support. That it would not always mean surrender to Allah is a reality that I have had to accept with a great deal of regret.

Amina Wadud, “Qur’an and Women”

#quran #amina wadud #islam #muslim #revert #convert

[whitegirlrevert]

Obsessed with this pic :D

[whitegirlrevert]

“The Sufi tradition contains a vast metaphysical and cosmological set of doctrines elaborated over a long period by masters of gnosis. It contains methods of spiritual realization that address nearly all the different spiritual possibilities on the levels of action, love, and knowledge. It has preserved over many centuries going back to the Prophet a regular chain of transmission of initiatic power (walayah/wilayah) and the grace (al-barakah) necessary for the spiritual journey. And above all, it can enable men and women to reach a state of sanctity.” — Seyyed Hossein Nasr, The Garden of Truth

[whitegirlrevert]

Ramadan 2018 Reflections

This Ramadan was a lot of many ‘firsts’ for me. I wasn’t working and my health was decent (surprisingly) so I was able to participate in the full fast. Yep, you guessed it, 19 hours a day without food or water. At first I thought, “ok. this is a month to put things aside to grow in my personal and spiritual development but does that actually happen?” Looking back, it really did. There are impacts that this month has on your life that if you maintain, you can make huge leaps forward in your life outside of Ramadan. This sounds very clique but it’s true because at the end of Ramadan you are already not doing those things so it makes it easier to continue when you “don’t have to”.

This Ramadan I learned 4 major things:

I talk way, way too much. I know, and have always known, that it’s so important to listen to other people. But what I haven’t recognized is how much me occupying space, by talking about things related to myself, takes away from actually hearing and learning about the other person. I realized awhile ago that since I feel comfortable talking about myself openly, I expect others to do the same even if they require prompts to do so. I wasn’t asking people questions because I thought it would be rude to ask them, that they would think I was prying, or that I would make them feel uncomfortable. Instead, I think some people might have gotten the impression that I simply didn’t care about them, their lives or their feelings. Regardless of my intention, if for other people that behaviour presents itself as disrespectful and self-centred then this is something I need to change. I can ask a question and if they choose not to answer they don’t have to.

I am a very angry person. So this was a weird thing for me because normally when people are hot, sleep-deprived, starving, and not to mention thirsty (the thirst was real this year guys) they get irritable and angry–for me it was the opposite. Fasting extinguished an anger within me. But through this I was able to recognize just how angry I am on a daily basis. It can’t be healthy to hold that much negative energy inside my body. I know that this may be difficult for people who know me, even know me well, to understand since I don’t present this way. I still don’t know how I’m actually going to work past this but I do want to get back into meditating daily again. I really dislike having to do it but I know it’s good for me. I will swallow this bitter medicine and i’A work through some of this shit inside me.

 Food sustains the body. I must eat to nourish myself. I’ve always had a difficult relationship with food but Ramadan forced me to eat because without that food I would have not been able to continue fasting. It kept me alive. For the first time in my life I saw food without all of its psychological complexities and just saw it as nourishment. When I ate I didn’t have to think about the act of eating or the food itself, it was just about getting it inside of my body to keep me alive.

Serving others, including family, is an act of worship and must not be taken lightly. I stopped groaning whenever my parents asked me to do something for them. And sure, it’s annoying to have to suddenly stop everything I’m doing and run to fetch fruit from the garage but I don’t groan about other things like prayer, so this also must stop.

#ramadan #ramadan mubarak #islam #muslimah #muslim #convert #revert