wonder-womans-ex

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My deepest darkest fantasy is that I collapse on the street and I am rushed to the hospital. They perform a bunch of tests and find out I am severely deficient in some kind of vitamin. Then I start taking the vitamin and I become the happiest cleverest person alive because all my problems were caused by this one deficiency

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the circus was in town that day 🤡

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you can’t support autistic people and support the police. No amount of paint jobs or sensitivity training can stop police from killing with impunity

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the Columbia University arrests are worse than they seem. They're arresting protesting students for trespassing. It goes without saying students cannot meaningfully "trespass" in the common areas of a university they attend. So Columbia University has suspended all student protestors from their institution, in the process revoking their access to housing, their belonging, and most crucially damaging their academic futures. We are witnessing full scale silencing and removal of anyone of conscience from the next generation of academia.

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i cannot possibly be the first person who has had this idea

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Trump would be such a good drag queen like just such an unbelievably incredible and talented drag queen it's such a bummer that he's decided to be a fascist and a threat to democracy because that cunt would devour at the House of Yes

such a loss

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okay but Aelwyn my love my darling I'm going to need you and Sam Nightingale to have mean nasty beautiful hate sex that is secretly deeply tender and healing for you both in a way that you would both find mortifying

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did somebody say elmville talking mode of transportation relationship chart

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the other option i will accept is if they throw all of dropout's most chaotic gremlin players at matt. like yea he knows erika. and yeah he has dm'ed for ally beardsley in a one shot. but no one can put the fear of god into a dungeon master quite like emily axford. yeah he has seen rekha play in bloodkeep. but what about grant o'brien? huh? what about zac "catboy" oyama? he played with izzy roland before but what will he do when he is facing persephone valentine? make him SWEAT in that dome.

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[start i.d.: a drawing of sam nightingale like needy from the pool scene in jennifer’s body. she looks at the viewer with a soft, smug look, drenched in sewer slime. the entire image has a green/teal haze. end i.d.]

yeah. two years ago when you were still socially relevant.

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Twitter users are defending their right to assume Picasso was a renaissance artist. Tiktok users think watching any film made outside the US makes you a snob. “Replace classic lit with YA and fan fiction” discourse is flourishing. I think we’re just living in anti intellectual times.

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im noticing that for a lot of americans “free palestine” has been an ideological motto and symbol rather than them actually believing in their heart that freedom is attainable and necessary

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i love the idea of ghosts not being dead people but just places where time is kind of thin

like one of my friends & his girlfriend have a ghost in their very old new england house that's apparently an old timey little boy who does shit like jump on the bed and slam doors but if they tell him very sternly "daniel, stop that" the activity stops immediately

and i love the idea that years ago theres this rowdy little 19th century boy just being alive and playing in his room but if he gets too loud sometimes, the ghostly form of my 21st century friend shows up and is like "Hey! Cut it out." and then vanishes and no one believes this child

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reblog if you’ve read fanfictions that are more professional, better written than some actual novels. I’m trying to see something

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Imagine you’re Gregory House and you work exclusively alone and stupid Cuddy is making you take on a fellow or you have to up clinic hours by double. So of course you’re gonna make it fun. So you decide to find the richest, most pretentious and privileged doctor you can find (since cuddy won’t let you hire an untrained pr*stitute), a real ‘mommy and daddy’s little Angel’ type, and BREAK them. So lucky for you Rowan Chase has a son that’s going off the deep end and really needs a job to straighten him out. Perfect. So you hire the little shit and decide to see how long it takes to break down his worldview. And he walks in, flowy golden hair, pretty eyes, and a fresh face. Of course he’s pretty too, even more privilege. Jackpot.

So you start him out and see how long it takes for him to call you poor and threaten to tell daddy, or use the phrase “do you know who my father is??” And in a cunning plan you tell this kid to break into a patient’s house to find clues to their deteriorating state (you know what’s causing it but GOD if it isn’t interesting) And to your surprise he does, not only that, but finds a diagnosis, proving you wrong in the process. So you ask him to do more and more and get you a coffee on the way, and he does. The poor kid looks like bambi after his mother got shot when he realises he messed the order up. You put off and put off sacking the poor kid, because he’s fun and nervous, but he’s daring too, willing to start a good argument, but desperate to please. Not at ALL what you’d expected.

And then Wilson starts liking the kid, becoming grossly paternal, bringing him food and looking after him when he had to jump out of a window on a house visit (whoops) and telling you off when you go too far. You ignore the rapidly increasing connections you’re finding to the three of you and a family unit; you’re meant to toy with the kid! Not teach him how to throw a ball.

And then you find yourself looking out for the stupid kid too. When he gets into fights or, hell, subtly praising him when he thinks you’re disappointed.

And you realise you really like this kid, so when Cuddy asks if he’s too much of a handful and how it’s going you have to make up some excuse about having a young and pretty secretary is actually pretty useful, despite having the wrong parts.

That stupid little spoilt brat you wanted to hire is actually an ambitious doctor that’s had no support, and you realise you actually want to keep him around and- despite the fact you’d never admit it- want to see him thrive. And if you hear him slip up and call you dad once or twice? You’ll let it slide.

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robert chase one of the characters of all time. hes blonde. he went to seminary school. he purposefully murdered a patient. he’s a vapid slut. allergic to strawberries. was caption of his college bowling team. desperately needs to be on antidepressants. he’s divorced. his ex-wife was/is in love with his dadboss. it’s heavily implied that this is part of why he married her to begin with. he’s been fired multiple times but he keeps coming back like a fucked-up obedient boomerang. he’s the best surgeon in the hospital. all this while having the personality of a sopping wet cardboard box of corn flakes that somebody poured milk into and let mildew.

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every house md episode part 2

random girl: hey gramps! let’s go for a run! get them juices flowing!

gramps: i’m a bit old, katy, so we’ll have to go slow

*they go running*

gramps: hhhh. hHhHhH

katy: you ok gramps? you need your inhaler?

gramps: o mi god katy your eyes are bleeding..

katy: *faints*

*INTRO MUSIC*

house: *bouncing ball around in his office, daydreaming about wilson*

cuddy: HOUSE the clinic is BACKED UP get in there NOW

house: no but i’ve got a case *lying*

cuddy: sure you do… get down there now

at the clinic

house: *sighs and picks up a file*

cameron: *runs up to house* i have a case!

house: i’ll take it! CUDDYYYY I HAVE A CASE FOR REALS NOW

cuddy: *is in distress*

house: *scurries away*

*** house: what’s the case

cameron: a girl fainted while running—

house: how unusual

cameron: running with her grandfather. and her eyes started bleeding

house: *snoring sounds*

cameron: … and uh she has low potassium—

house: she ugly?

cameron: what? no

house: you always pick the ugly ones

cameron: no i don’t

house: so why’d you pick her? why do you feel bad for her?

cameron: i don’t i just thought her case was interesting.

house: a girl who doesn’t enough bananas is interesting?

cameron: her eyes started bleeding!

house: is she a widow?

cameron: she’s 17!

house: so?

they walk into the office

chase: wow… she lost both her parents and lives with her grandfather…

house: bingo!

***

the office is silent as the ducklings read katy’s file

house: please, not everybody all at once..

foreman: it’s a brain clot. got activated when she went running.

house: bad. next

chase: it’s lady gaga virus! that’s why it came on suddenly

house: check for a brain clot

foreman: *evil smirk*

*** cameron is in the patient’s room getting blood

cameron: it must be hard… both parents dead. living with your grandfather

katy: i don’t need your pity

*** chase: *walking into the office with the other minions behind him* it’s not a brain clot

house: hmmmm…

chase: back to lady gaga virus—

house: it is NOT lady gaga virus you idiot

cameron: maybe an eyeball embolism caused by a seizure?

house: and why would she have had a seizure?

cameron: low potassium causes invisible seizure syndrome. she wouldn’t have noticed it.

house: that’s 1 in a million rare… i like it. do five blood cultures

the minions obey

***

cameron: it’s not eyeball embolism!!

chase: LADY GAGA VIRUS

house: FOR THE LAST TIME, IT IS NOT— *epiphany* omygod it’s lady gaga virus…

chase: *evil smirk*

*** the patient has recovered.

wilson: it is now time for my 5 minutes of screen time