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wonderfilworld · 2 years

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Sarah🥺🥺thank you so much!! This means so much to me, this fic is my baby. Gonna go cry my eyes out from your kind words now<3

i can take you there but baby you won't make it back

Y/N and Sirius are about to graduate college. she's never been to a proper college party before, but Sirius is determined to bring her out of her shell. They've known each other for years and they've always been just friends. But why does it feel different now? aka best friends (idiots) to lovers. modern!au

a/n okay so as a lil backstory - I had planned this as a whole 5 part series back in March. Like the first half of this has been written for months. I just got so busy with other things that i never got around to finishing it. However, I really did like the idea, so I just condensed it all and decided to make it one long one-shot! so if some details don't make sense it's because it was meant to be answered later in other parts so just ignore that, also it's written in 3rd person pov, I didn't feel like going back and editing it out, lol.

warnings/contains: NSFW smut: oral fem receiving, unprotected sex, just soft morning/first time (together) sex; insecurities; partying and everything that comes with it; drinking; mentions of puke; mentions of drugs; mentions of tattoos and tattoo needles, lots of sappy siri in love.

word count: 6.6k

masterlist

“Come on.”

“No, Sirius.”

“Why not? You never get out of your apartment. You’re in college for fuck’s sake, have some fun.” He fumbles with the keys to his apartment, cursing as he shifts the bags of groceries further into his arm as he unlocks his door.

“Because,” Y/N starts, following him inside. She toes off her shoes before setting the bags of Sirius’ groceries on the counter. “I don’t need to get drunk off my ass to have fun. That doesn’t even sound like fun to me.”

“Well then don’t get drunk,” he says with a shrug as he unloads the contents of the bags. He shuffles around the kitchen, putting his groceries in their designated spots. “It’s more fun to watch people who are drunk off their asses, anyway.”

She sighs, opening his pantry to put a jar of peanut butter away. It’s not that she doesn’t want to go to this party, it’s just that she’s never been to one before. Y/N’s heard horror stories of things happening at them; people getting hurt, cops getting called, and even though she’s of legal drinking age, she still has a fear of getting in trouble. “Still, I just don’t think I want to be around all that.”

Sirius drops his head back onto his shoulders and groans. “Oh my god, Y/N, just come already. I’ll be with you the whole time.”

They look at each other for a few seconds as she contemplates her answer. Y/N can’t lie and say she isn’t curious, and she knows her best friend will keep his word and stay by her side the whole night. And besides, she does want to have at least one college party experience before she graduates.

“Fine,” she tells him. She puts the empty grocery bags away and grabs her car keys. She slips her shoes back on as she gets ready to leave. “When is it?”

“Tonight.”

“Sirius!” Y/N’s eyes widen as she gapes at him. She would have liked a bigger heads up - she’s not a people person and she needs time to prepare herself for her first party. “What time?”

“I’ll pick you up at nine,” is all he says. His back is facing her so he doesn’t see when she flicks her middle finger up at him as she opens the door.

“‘Kay. See you.”

She huffs as she walks out of the building, squinting at the sunlight that streams in her eyes. She and Sirius have been friends since freshman year; he walked in late to their English class and took up the seat next to her. He asked for a pen, and ever since then the two of them have been best friends.

They’re seniors now, and as the date of their graduation grows near, she can’t help but wonder if this friendship will last outside of college. The two of them get along so well it’s hard to imagine that they would ever be apart. Their other friends always joke that they’re soulmates - even though neither of them believes in such - and that it was a shame they weren’t attracted to each other.

And it was true, she loved Sirius deeply, but definitely not in that way. Besides, it’s not like Sirius would go for her anyway; he’s so popular - has the most perfect long black hair that looks amazing tied in a bun, skin littered with tattoos, and a charismatic charm that gets him tons of friends.

Y/N on the other hand, she’s the opposite. She’s not loud and outgoing like her best friend; she’s quiet and timid, preferring to stay by herself rather than go out. She doesn’t like big crowds, they make her uneasy.

That’s one reason she looks up to Sirius so much, as much as she hates to admit it, she’s happy that he tries to bring her out of her shell. He’s spent years trying to get her to go with him to parties, but she worries too much and drunk people make her nervous.

Therein lies another difference, Sirius is a risk taker; Y/N preferring to stay on the sidelines and live vicariously through other people. She’s fine with staying home all the time and doesn’t see a point in the party lifestyle that Sirius seems to enjoy, but lately she’s been feeling as if she’s running out of time and she’s scared that one day she’ll regret not taking these opportunities as they come.

She wishes she was as bold as him.

---

She hears three knocks on her door at nine-thirty.

Yet again another difference between the two friends; Sirius is always late - fashionably, as he calls it - whereas Y/N is always at least fifteen minutes early to any event. Being late makes her anxious; she doesn’t want to feel like people are waiting on her.

She gets up from her couch where she’s been waiting ever since she finished getting ready over forty-five minutes ago (she’s not lying when she says she likes to be early!). She walks over to the door, stumbling slightly due to the wedges on her feet.

She doesn’t really dress up, like, ever, but she figures her first college party constitutes a cute outfit and she thinks she looks decent for someone who’s only worn t-shirts and leggings for the past couple of months.

She grabs the knob, twists, and pulls open the door, revealing the smiling face of Sirius Black. His eyebrows shoot up as he looks her up and down, and a whistle escapes his lips as his eyes meet hers again. “Well I’ll be damned, you’re really going all out, huh?”

She blushes slightly as she takes her time to look at him. He’s wearing an old AC/DC t-shirt that she’s sure he just woke up from taking a nap in as it’s all wrinkly, a black leather jacket on top, and ripped skinny jeans on his legs. His hair is pulled into a messy low bun, front pieces framing his face. He really is quite pretty, she thinks, and she meets his eyes as she replies, “I wanted to make a good first impression.”

“Oh yeah? With whom?” He leans against her door frame, arms crossed as he cocks his head to the side.

“I don’t know, just want people to like me,” she mumbles and Sirius frowns. He knows Y/N has a hard time making friends - she’s too quiet for her own good sometimes - and Sirius thinks maybe that’s why they get along so well. They’re complete opposites; Y/N hardly ever cursing whereas Sirius lets them slip past his lips almost every other word; He’s covered in tattoos whereas Y/N would probably pass out if a needle came anywhere near her skin (trust him, she’s gone with him to the tattoo parlor many times and every time, Y/N looks like she’s going to barf) but she loves the way they look on Sirius, always admiring them and telling him how pretty they are. Her favorite is one of a black dog on the back of his left shoulder.

Sirius sighs, reaching to hug his friend as he assures her, “Don’t worry about what people think of you, Y/N. If they don’t love you immediately then they’re not worth it.” He strokes her hair, careful not to mess up her hard work. He’s always attentive when it comes to her; Sirius values his friends more than anything, and his heart calls out to the anxious girl.

Y/N takes a deep breath, and she can smell his cologne, a spicy, citrusy scent and the faint smell of cigarettes. Another difference; Sirius smokes, and it makes Y/N gag. He never smokes around her unless he’s stressed or angry, and Y/N’s thankful.

He really is a great friend.

---

They arrive at the party; it’s at some random econ major’s house, but it’s huge, and when Y/N walks in, her jaw drops.

Immediately upon walking in the front door they enter a big room with high ceilings and a chandelier in the center. The room is crowded - bodies moving along to a sensual song playing from speakers set up in the corners of the room. Everyone has a plastic cup in their hand, taking sips every so often as they bounce to the rhythm of the music. Y/N can see people playing beer-pong in the other room, players yelling loudly when they make a shot. She doesn’t realize she’s cringing until she feels Sirius’ hand on her lower back, looking at her with concern etched into his features.

“Okay so far?” He pushes her with his hand on her back into the other room, and Y/N guesses it’s the living room as there are a couple of couches and a TV set up where a bunch of guys are watching a football game.

Y/N nods her head slowly, taking in the scenes around her. Other than the people dancing in the main room, she sees a couple sitting at the bottom of the stairs engaged in a very messy lip lock. She looks to her left and sees a small poker table filled with people laughing and taking sips from beer bottles. As they enter the kitchen she sees people sitting atop the counter, laughing and drinking what she assumes to be punch from a bowl that’s on top of the counter.

“You want a drink?” Sirius asks her as he grabs a cup. He knows she probably doesn’t, knows she’s probably rethinking her decision to even come here in the first place, but he asks anyway.

“Um - I don’t know. What is that?” she asks, pointing to the punch.

“No idea, probably vodka and some fruit juice. S’usaually what Adam makes, anyway.”

Y/N wrinkles her nose; she’s never really been a huge fan of liquor like that, the only thing she really drinks are the fruity six-pack ones that are mainly just sugar that Sirius buys for her.

But she really wants to try to fit in, so she nods her head. “Okay.”

Sirius nods before he fills her cup. “Here, I only put a little in case you didn’t like it.”

Y/N gives him a small smile as she grabs the cup, lifts it to her lips, and takes a sip. She swallows, and it burns, most definitely not like the fruity drinks she’s used to. It makes her shiver, and Sirius laughs at the look on her face.

“You don’t have to drink it if you don’t wanna.”

“I’m fine,” she says, and she watches him as he fills his own cup. He takes a sip, but unlike Y/N he doesn’t make a face. He goes to these parties all the time, so she’s sure he’s used to Adam’s punch by now.

“Whatever you say,” he replies, looking around the room. It looks as if he’s trying to decide where to go next, and Y/N desperately hopes he doesn’t leave her alone.

She looks around the kitchen once more. It’s messy, empty cups are thrown everywhere, spills of punch and beer on the counter and floor. The whole house smells of weed and alcohol, and Y/N is kind of regretting her decision to come. It’s definitely how she’d imagined parties to be - loud and crowded - but she’s just not reacting to it how she thought she would. She thought inebriated people would be more forthcoming, welcoming her and she had always heard that drunk girls were always the nicest, but except for a few smiles and waves as they entered the house, no one has really spoken to them.

Y/N is brought out of her thoughts by Sirius’ arm draping over her shoulders as he greets a friend. She looks up at the man - he’s almost as tall as Sirius - and gives him a small smile as his eyes meet hers.

“And who is this?” the man asks, eyes barely open as she’s sure he’s heavily intoxicated.

“This is Y/N,” Sirius says, and his tone is more annoyed than Y/N expected it to be. She looks over at him with furrowed brows but Sirius stares straight at the man, jaw clenching in aggravation.

“Hi,” she says to the man, and she feels Sirius’ arm twitch around her.

“Hey,” the man’s smile widens, and Y/N notices he’s missing a couple of teeth. He’s definitely not somebody she would hang around with otherwise - although technically neither is Sirius - but she can tell straight away that this man is bad news. He’s wearing a plain black shirt with holes in it, and not the deliberate kind in the shirts that Sirius wears often, but these are big ugly holes that show way too much of his belly than Y/N wants to see. It’s covered in some sort of liquid and she can smell it from here. His pants are also wet, and she notices he’s not wearing shoes and now it makes sense why Sirius is annoyed.

He’s been protective of Y/N since the beginning, especially after she came to his door crying one night after a bad date with a guy who was mean to her. Every time Y/N tells him she’s talking to someone else, Sirius will roll his eyes and tell her “don’t make me have to kick another poor dude’s ass.”

Y/N doesn’t ask him to be this way, but she’s glad he is; she’s an only child and has always been jealous of her friend’s older brothers who would be protective over them.

“I’m Adam,” the guy - Adam - says. He gives her a nod, and Sirius sighs loudly through his nose as he tugs Y/N along with him to the other room. He doesn’t even offer a goodbye to Adam.

“This isn’t what I was expecting,” she tells him.

Sirius barks out a laugh, flashing his pretty white teeth at her as he replies. “Yeah? What were you expecting?”

Y/N shrugs against his arm that’s still over her shoulders. “Dunno. Just something else.”

“Are you okay, though?” He questions, protective Sirius making a return. “Do you want to leave?”

“No, no,” She shakes her head, grabbing the arm around her, giving it a squeeze. “‘M okay, really. Just need to adjust.” She lifts the cup to her lips once more, taking a bigger sip than last time. She still shivers, though not as much, and she can swear she already feels a light buzz coming on. She’s a lightweight, that’s for sure.

Sirius still looks skeptical - he doesn’t really believe her - but she’s grown, he thinks, and she’ll tell him when she’s ready to leave.

“Okay then.”

So they spend the night like that, glued to each other’s side as Sirius talks to his friends. Most of them Y/N’s met before, they’ve had one or more classes together at some point.

As the night goes on she continues drinking, even trying a sip of beer (although she doesn’t really like it, thinks she’ll stick to her fruity punch), and she never complains, not even once!

She’s very proud of herself.

---

They’ve been here going on two and a half hours now, and Y/N is feeling great. She’s had more of this tasty punch than she can remember, although it’s kind of lost it’s taste now and she thinks that’s weird. And the people are so much nicer now! Or maybe it’s just Y/N, since she hasn’t been able to shut up for the past hour. She says hi to any and everybody she comes into contact with, and Sirius thinks it’s adorable. He even let her play a game of beer pong!

He’s never seen Y/N like this; sure, he’s seen her drunk before, but that was when it was just the two of them at each other’s apartment. But Y/N is full on drunk now, giggling at anything and everything happening in the room. Her eyes are half-lidded and she hiccups randomly, and Sirius prays she doesn’t puke. He doesn’t want her to get embarrassed at her first party, and he’s internally scolding himself for letting her get this intoxicated.

A couple of Sirius’ friends are standing with them; three guys who Sirius has gotten close with over his college years. There’s James, a pretty brunette with round glasses who’s super funny and sweet. Remus is standing next to James; he’s probably the most similar to Y/N, he’s on the quieter side but make no mistake - he’s just as mischievous as the rest of them. Lastly there’s Peter, and Y/N has always been confused by his friendship with the other boys; he never really talks, just seems to go along with everything the other boys do.

Y/N isn’t really aware of the interaction, she’s too busy watching the latest game of beer pong, jumping up and down as her new friend Christian makes a cup. She grabs a hold of the front of Sirius’ shirt as she looks up at him. “Did y’see that, Siri?”

And she has this bright smile on her face, genuine happiness showing through her features over a stranger's shot, and Sirius can’t help but smile and nod his head. His chest is warm, and he can feel his cheeks heat up as his best friend smiles at him. He’s confused; doesn’t know where these feelings are coming from.

Y/N’s hands are still fisted in his shirt, her eyes focused on the intense game ahead. He can tell she’s getting tired, leaning the majority of her weight on him and he wraps his other arm around her front to keep her steady.

Later, when Sirius thinks back to this night, it’s this moment - bringing Y/N to this party full of people that are nothing like her, holding her close as a means to protect her and keep her safe - that changed everything for him.

And that scares him more than anything.

---

Sirius had left Y/N outside while he used the bathroom. He told her to wait by the door, but her new friend Chritsian had come up and started talking to her after he finished his game of beer pong and invited her to sit outside with him.

Sirius had to give him some threatening words of advice; something that went along the lines of “if you so much as lay a finger on her or try to take her away from here, I’ll break your fucking nose.”

Needless to say, Christian got the memo and promised the two of them would be sitting on the grass watching people play cornhole.

That’s where Sirius found them - well, found Y/N - once he walked out of the sliding glass doors into the backyard.

The backyard was a nice, fenced in area with shrubs along the edges and a nice sized pool in the center. There weren't many people around - it was well after midnight and many people had made their way home.

Y/N was sitting with her knees tucked into her chest, arms wrapped around them as her head was tipped back looking to the stars. The anger Sirius felt towards the bastard who left her alone dissipated as he watched her observe the night sky. He stood there for a couple minutes; he’s never taken the time to actually look at her, never watched her in a quiet moment such as this.

He realizes he probably looks like a creep, staring at this poor drunk girl, so he decides it’s time to call it a night. He makes his way to her with a small grin on his face.

“Come on, time t’go,” Sirius says as he reaches a hand out to her.

Y/N shakes her head no furiously, she feels so good; so light and floaty, and why is Sirius trying to ruin that?

“Don’t wanna,” she replies, still shaking her head. Sirius sighs as he closes his eyes and pinches the bridge of his nose.

“Stop shaking your head like that, you’ll puke everywhere.”

She frowns but stops shaking her head, “‘M havin’ fun.” Her words are slurred, blending together and Sirius can barely make them out.

“You can have fun back at your apartment, Y/N. ‘S time t’go.” Sirius doesn’t reach out this time, instead grabs her wrists and pulls her up with him.

“Heyyyyy,” she pouts, jutting her bottom lip out. Her eyes are closed, Sirius reckons she can hardly keep them open. “Please don’t make me leave. ‘M having fun! Isn’t that what you wanted?” She opens her eyes then, still pouting, and the look has the air catching in Sirius’ lungs.

His heartbeat picks up and he forgets how to speak for a moment. She looks so genuinely upset that Sirius wants to get her home and of course he wanted her to have a good time tonight, but it’s past one in the morning at this point and while he could easily stay up later, he knows she will be thankful for him carrying her home at a decent (ish) time.

“Of course, bug, but ’s really late, and I need t’get you home.” He tucks her underneath his arm and makes his way to his car. He shakes his head, asking himself what the hell that feeling was back there. He just couldn’t think, she looked so cute pouting like that, and all he wanted to do was lean in and plant a sweet kiss on her bottom lip.

He’s sure it’s just the alcohol running through his system - it has to be. He’s never looked at her as anything more than a friend. Sure, he’d do anything for her, go to the ends of the earth to make her happy, but that’s just what friends do, right?

And then it hits Sirius, a feeling embedded in the fragments of his soul, that he loves her. Not like in the way he tells her often, because he does - every day almost - but he’s in love with her.

It should surprise him; he’s never thought about her as anything more than a friend - not until tonight night at least - but it doesn’t.

He thinks he’s loved her all along.

---

“Here y’go m’lady,” Sirius announces as he opens the door to Y/N’s apartment.

She’s half-asleep, barely standing as Sirius guides her through the living room and to her bedroom. She’s tripping over her feet as her eyes are closed and she’s trusting Sirius with her safe journey to her bed.

Sighing loudly, Sirius sets Y/N down on her bed, bending down to remove the shoes from her feet.

“Canyoutakem’makeupoffplease,” Y/N slurs, her words are quiet and meshed together and Sirius has to decipher them for a moment before he responds.

“Sure,” he tells her, standing to his feet and making his way to the bathroom to grab her makeup remover. He returns and sits beside her on the bed as he grabs her face in one hand and a makeup cloth in the other. Y/N turns her head towards him, looking up at him with glossy eyes.

Sirius pauses for a moment, his eyes catching hers, and the knot in his chest returns. He looks at her, really looks at her - her mascara started to run earlier in the night and it creates smudges underneath her eyes, black flecks strewn across her skin.

But Sirius thinks she looks beautiful like this - perfectly ruffled and not pristine whatsoever. He’s confused because of course he knew she was beautiful, but when did she get this beautiful?

“Close your eyes,” He whispers, raising the cloth to wipe at the remaining makeup on her skin.

Y/N complies, humming lightly as Sirius works to cleanse her skin. Her mind is buzzing - she’s so sleepy - but she also feels like she could stay up all night. Is this how parties always make people feel?

“Did you have a good time?” Sirius asks her, gently swabbing underneath her eyes.

“Mhm!” Y/N answers, opening her eyes. “It was super fun! I liked the punch, and I made tons of new friends, did you see?” She smiles, face lighting up as she recalls her night.

And Sirius can’t help but return the smile, chest warming at her happy visage. He’s happy he brought her tonight, proud he’s slowly bringing her out of her shell. She’s always been so important to him; someone who wormed their way into his extremely private heart and made a home in his chest. He sighs as he gets up from the bed, mind running, taunting him about the various revelations he’s had tonight. He knew he loved her, but when did he fall in love with her?

“Where y’goin?” Y/N yawns, hand slapping against her face as she brings it up to block her mouth. She giggles, scrunches her face up at herself and Sirius feels as if his chest is going to explode.

“Gonna go home now, bug,” he tells her, walking to her bathroom to put her things away. He hears her whine as he washes his hands; he looks into the mirror at himself - dark bags under his eyes from lack of sleep, hair a mess from where Y/N grabbed ahold of it as he carried her to his car. He sighs again, watching as his chest puffs out and back down again. He’s broken out of his trance from the water turning hot; the scorching temperature making his heart jump as he yanks his hands back. He dries them off before walking back into Y/N’s bedroom, eyes finding her’s as she looks at him from under the covers, her body a cocoon; the only thing visible of her is from her nose up.

He can’t help the way his lips tug upwards, eyes narrowing in a genuine smile the longer he looks at her. He walks over to her, brings a hand to brush against her forehead before his lips take their place, placing a delicate peck to the center of her skin a bit longer than he probably would do on any other day. He straightens his back out as he stands, opens his mouth to speak before her arm shoots out of the covers to grab at his hands.

“Stay,” she says, lowering the covers so it shows her pout, knowing Sirius has a hard time saying no to that. “Please.”

Sirius has a moment of internal panic - he’s just realized he’s in love with his best friend, and now she wants him to stay the night with her. He knows that if he sleeps here tonight the feelings will only fester more intensely, will bubble and build up until they’re pouring out of his lips and he won’t be able to take them back. Sirius Black is not a shy person - most people would say he’s the opposite - but what the hell is she doing to him?

Maybe it’s because he holds Y/N’s opinions in higher regard than others. There’s not many people that he’s this close to, so he doesn’t give a shit what they think. But Y/N; her opinion matters so much to him - everything she does matters to him, he’s realizing - and he can’t risk losing her, no fucking way.

“I’ll be on the couch,” he decides, grabbing the blankets to bring back up her arms, tucking her snugly back into the bed. And because he can’t resist, he leans down and presses another kiss to her forehead, let’s his lips linger on her skin as he whispers, breath fanning across her skin, and she shivers despite the covers. “Good night.”

---

As soon as he wakes, he makes breakfast. His hangover is not as strong as he’s sure Y/N’s is, but he makes food enough for two anyway. He pours a glass of water before tiptoeing into her bedroom, kicking against the door softly with one foot as a warning before he’s coming in, peering onto the bed to see Y/N’s sleeping frame.

She’s facing him, still wrapped up in her blankets, face devoid of any creases and wrinkles as it is during the day with her usual expressions.

Sirius looks at her for a moment, breathing in through his nose and out through his mouth before he makes his way to her bed. He sets the food and water on the bedside table before he leans back over to place another kiss to her unmarred forehead. He could barely sleep; mind reliving every moment the two of them have had before, trying to pinpoint the moment where friendship turned to something more - at least for him.

But he couldn’t place it. It’s just as if he’s felt them from the moment they met. Or as if they slowly built up that he couldn’t decide a single tipping point for them. He slowly got acclimated to the way that she drinks her coffee, or the face she makes when she finds something annoying, or the way she smiles when she finds something she likes on sale. He fell in love with them all, one at a time.

He watches as her eyes peel open, one after the other, and squint through the morning light that streams through the curtains. She groans, breaks her arms out of her cocoon as she stretches, groan breaking into a yawn as she wakes her limbs up.

Once she settles she grimaces, eyes squeezing shut as a moan of pain escapes her lips. Y/N looks back up to Sirius, “Ow.”

He realizes he must look stupid, just standing at the side of her bed staring, so he clears his throat and picks up the glass of water, “Here, drink.”

Y/N lifts herself into a seated position, rests her back against her headboard as she takes the glass from Sirius’ hand. Her shaky hand brings the drink to her lips and she chugs, drops slipping down her chin and onto the blankets in her lap.

“How y’feelin’?” Sirius questions, taking a seat next to her. He studies her as she gulps the rest of her drink down, giving Sirius back the glass. He holds it in his hand, fingertips pressed against the cool material as she answers.

“Little queasy,” she crinkles her nose, bringing the covers back up as she returns to her lying position. She looks at Sirius, “Wanna lay w’me? We can watch a movie.”

Sirius nods his head, habit sneaking it’s way into his system. They’ve done this countless times before, laying in the same bed, only a few feet apart, but now it feels too crowded.

He lies with her anyway, snatching half of the cover for himself. They’re both still in their clothes from last night and Sirius cringes, they probably smell like a dumpster.

Y/N doesn’t seem to notice though, scooting closer until their elbows touch, turning her head to him, “What do you want to watch?”

And her face is so close to his that he can’t help but to reach out to her, cupping her cheek in his big hand as he studies her face. She’s so close and he’s never been so in love before.

She furrows her brows, confusion etching her features. She whispers, “Siri?”

And it’s that stupid nickname that makes him do it, the one that he would never in a million years let anyone call him but this beautiful girl in front of him that pushes his head forward until their lips are centimeters apart, breath fanning across each other’s faces. He pauses then, takes a deep breath and when he realizes that she isn’t pulling back he eliminates the last bit of distance between them.

He kisses her hard because he’s tired of waiting, kisses her harder because he wanted to do this last night. And when her tongue licks at the seam of his lips he kisses her even harder because he realizes she’s wanted this too. Their tongues meet in the middle, tasting each other for the first time and then all bets are off; their hands grab at each other’s body, holding tightly onto each other because they’re finally getting what they wanted. And they’re not letting go any time soon.

They kiss as they remove their clothes, one article at a time, barely pausing to gaze at the other’s body before they’re kissing again, deep and passionate like they’re ashamed of all the time that they’ve wasted.

His kisses feel like home. His lips, the way they travel from her mouth to her cheek, from her jaw to her shoulder, planting little seeds of him within her bones; pieces that will root him into her like she did to him when she didn’t even realize it. He kisses her skin hard, leaving bruises with his delicate lips, burning her skin as they pass along her collar bone.

His lips travel to her breasts and he holds them with his hands, presses his face in between them and breathes her in. Maybe he’s trying to memorize her scent like he’s memorized everything else about her. Maybe what everyone said about them was right. Maybe they are soulmates.

His lips encase one of her sensitive buds, tongue flicking against it before his teeth catch onto it. He faintly hears her cry out, barely recognizes the feeling of his hair being pulled as a groan slips through his lips. He sucks her nipple, gently at first, and then when he hears the heavenly gasp she lets out he sucks harder, thumb pressing onto the other one as she mewls. Her back arches, pushing her breasts onto Sirius’ face and he growls, uses his arms to trap her back onto the bed.

He lavishes her breasts until he’s had his fill, sucks and bites both of them until they’re covered in the evidence of his presence. He continues his path downwards, nipping along the skin again, admiring every piece of flesh he runs across because it’s hers and it deserves the praise.

He’s angry that it took him so long to realize; that he’s had to wait this long to kiss all the soft, rounded spots of Y/N’s body, but as long as he gets to hear the whimpers she lets out as he presses his hand against her cunt for the rest of his life he thinks he’ll be okay. He cups her pussy, presses his heel down onto her clit as he sucks the inside of her thigh, and flicks his fingers through her slit. He feels how wet she’s become - how wet he’s made her - and she cries out as Sirius teeth pierce her flesh.

“Sirius,” oh, her voice sounds so breathless and it makes Sirius groan, makes him remove his hand so he can replace it with his mouth, tonguing the area where his fingers just were, collecting her slick on his taste buds. He licks into her core, tongues around her gummy walls and hears her keen, hands making a home in his hair. She tugs at the roots and Sirius groans.

He buries his face in her pussy, licks into her so hard she’s squirming under him. His hands plant her bottom half firmly into the mattress so that she’s only able to arch her back, cry to the ceiling as his tongue works against her. Next time he can go slow but he just wants her now, he’s so tired of thinking about how he could’ve done this sooner and instead worried about how much the two of them can do it later. Because now that he has Y/N, he’s not letting her go.

He brings his tongue to her clit as his fingers slip into her core, curling upwards as his tongue curls around her nerves, popping the bud between his lips as his fingers begin to pump. She’s not pushing his head away anymore, no, now she’s pulling him in; holding his head firmly in place as her hips stutter upwards to meet his fingers.

He pumps his fingers fast, one at first and then adding two, scissoring them within her to hear the way she chokes on a gasp, the way she tries to cover her mouth because she’ll wail if she doesn’t. The only words leaving her lips are his name and little oh’s when he curls his fingers and hits that extra sensitive spot on the roof of her core.

She cums once this way, her body seizing up and thighs closing around Sirius’ head as her cunt flutters around Sirius’ fingers, clit pulsing against his tongue as he licks against it. He travels back up her body the same way he descended it, kissing against her soft skin until he reaches her mouth, licking against her teeth before he meets her tongue, feeling the vibrations from the groan she lets out at her own taste.

He takes his cock into his hand, pumps himself a couple of times before he slips it inside of her, the pair gasping into each other’s mouths, her from the stretch of Sirius’ thick length, and Sirius from Y/N’s hot core squeezing him tight as he settles within her. His whole body grows warm as she acclimates to his size, the two of them still engaged in a heavy liplock, his hair between her fingers.

When he does move it’s electric; his whole body feels as if it’s on fire, pleasure sweeping up his spine at the way he drags his cock out of her, slow and soft; nice and even.

They move together, her hips chasing his as he pulls out, both of them joining together again almost immediately after. They’re whimpering and moaning too much to kiss now, settling for resting their foreheads against one another as they watch where they’re joined. Sirius is covered in chills from head to toe, body moving on it’s own accord as her cunt gushes around him, the way she holds onto him tightly and cries out his name every time his cock hits that spot within her has him on edge, so close to falling apart at her fingertips. Does she know that she has him in the palms of her hands? Surely she does, if the way she scratches her nails against his back as she climbs the ladder to ecstasy is any indicator.

She makes it there a couple of thrusts later, clamping down on his sensitive cock, crying out his name over and over like it’s the only thing she knows. She’s holding onto him like she never wants to let go, and Sirius doesn’t think he’d care if she never did.

And then he’s right there with her, balls tightening as waves roll up his spine, knocking the breath out of him as he takes himself out of her, grabbing onto his cock and tugging until he’s emptied all of his seed onto her belly.

He kisses her again, harder this time now that he can breathe, and holds onto her as they calm down from their highs. They lie like that for a while, unbothered that they’re both sticky with cum because there’s plenty of time to clean up later. They’ll probably be even dirtier soon.

Sirius doesn’t stop kissing her. He never wants to remove his lips from Y/N’s pillowy one’s, never wants to forget the way her sighs feel as they bounce off of his mouth.

He’s not sure where they’ll end up after graduation - whether it will be together or apart - but they’re together now, so he’ll make the most of every moment.

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#sarah you’re too kind to me #thank u so much!!!!!

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