yesjejunus

[yesjejunus]

a little piece of my soul breaks away every time I see someone ask why the east coast has a harder time putting together a stable government/farming/access to water/etc

I beseech you all to actually pay attention to (or perhaps outright play) fo3 and fo4, all your answers are literally right there. The institute intentionally did everything they could to obstruct progress on the surface!

... and if the bulk of your knowledge of the west coast comes from fnv, to please recognize that vegas is a complete outlier, because of the protection robert house gave it. pretty much everywhere else is just as horrifically radioactive and unstable as dc

#really this boils down to “please play fo3” #so go do that

[yesjejunus]

you know I think it would be really funny if I just started talking about nathaniel again

I know you all want to hear me talk about fallout, whether it's the show or fnv

but have you heard about this little novel from 1984 by John Saul--

[yesjejunus]

you know I think it would be really funny if I just started talking about nathaniel again

I know you all want to hear me talk about fallout, whether it's the show or fnv

but have you heard about this little novel from 1984 by John Saul--

[yesjejunus]

there's only one thing worse than an awful book, and that is an awful book with ONE tantalisingly compelling element

#NATHANIEL #fucking nathaniel #the best book... that I could fix

[yesjejunus]

By the rivers of Babylon, there we sat down, yea, we wept, when we remembered Out of Touch Thursday.

#return of the king

[yesjejunus]

fallout tv show good

[yesjejunus]

a robot walks in with pixelated kiss marks all over its display screen saying “you should see the other bot” so you go look and there’s just a pile of crushed metal and shattered plastic and torn wires

[yesjejunus]

[yesjejunus]

It is funny. Recently I had a transphobe argue to me, that "well, it is all made up! Animals will still not know that you identify as a man". Which to me is so funny, because while there has never been extensive research done on this topic, there is a lot of anecdotal evidence showing the exact opposite.

As someone who has done a lot of work with animals, I can tell you, that those animals that for one reason or another like one gender more or less than another often show the same loving or hostile behavior towards people completely depending on the gender the people actually identifies as.

"Sure," some people might say, "because if you take hormons you gonna smell like the gender to an animal." But that is the funny part. Animals often act according to that with trans adults who are still in egg mode. Who have not come out yet. And nobody knows why and how they can tell.

But some of the harsher animals with a "gender preference in humans" are like the best trans indicators. You have not admitted to yourself you are a guy? Yeah, this cat is gonna hate you anyways. Because this cat hates men.

Sincerely the guy who got attacked by this one fucking bunny, who didn't like dudes, several times

#our cats significantly prefers women #which is my personal daily heartbreak because no snuggles and cuddles for ME #but also good for my gender affirming cat I guess

[yesjejunus]

pixel studies

[yesjejunus]

"little" and "freak" are my favourite adjective noun combo. like not only are you peculiar in nature but you are also rather small.

[yesjejunus]

I have never read a more excellent article

[yesjejunus]

This was a really difficult cipher, Professor Van Helsing, I’m not surprised you had to diagram it out.

[yesjejunus]

8am incest study

12pm cannibalism debate

12:30 tea break

1pm necrophilia discussion

3pm eroticism

6pm dinner + beer

[yesjejunus]

one of the more valuable things I’ve learned in life as a survivor of a mentally unstable parent is that it is likely that no one has thought through it as much as you have. 

no, your friend probably has not noticed they cut you off four times in this conversation. 

no, your brother didn’t realize his music was that loud while you were studying. 

no, your bff or S.O. doesn’t remember that you’re on a tight deadline right now.

no, no one else is paying attention to the four power dynamics at play in your friend group right now.  

a habit of abused kids, especially kids with unstable parents, is the tendency to notice every little detail. We magnify small nuances into major things, largely because small nuances quickly became breaking points for parents. Managing moods, reading the room, perceiving danger in the order of words, the shift of body weight….it’s all a natural outgrowth of trying to manage unstable parents from a young age. 

Here’s the thing: most people don’t do that. I’m not saying everyone else is oblivious, I’m saying the over analysis of minor nuances is a habit of abuse. 

I have a rule: I do not respond to subtext. This includes guilt tripping, silent treatments, passive aggressive behavior, etc. I see it. I notice it. I even sometimes have to analyze it and take a deep breath and CHOOSE not to respond. Because whether it’s really there or just me over-reading things that actually don’t mean anything, the habit of lending credence to the part of me that sees danger in the wrong shift of body weight…that’s toxic for me. And dangerous to my relationships. 

The best thing I ever did for myself and my relationships was insist upon frank communication and a categorical denial of subtext. For some people this is a moral stance. For survivors of mentally unstable parents this is a requirement of recovery. 

[yesjejunus]

[yesjejunus]

‘A good tragedy is always both preventable and inevitable’ is one of my main hills to die on. It’s literally so important to me. I’m fucking correct