zaebosdemon

[zaebosdemon]

And speaking of Sophia Tolstoy, her diaries are just so depressing. 

“I am to gratify his pleasure and nurse his child, I am a piece of household furniture, I am a woman. I try to suppress all human feelings. When the machine is working properly it heats the milk, knits a blanket, makes little requests and bustles about trying not to think […].“

She wrote this when she was 19, one year into her marriage to Leo and as she was pregnant with the first of his 13 children.

A few years later, when she was 25 or so:

“I am so often alone with my thoughts that the need to write in my diary comes quite naturally … Now I am well again and not pregnant—it terrifies me how often I have been in that condition. He said that for him being young meant “I can achieve anything”. For me […] reason tells me that there is nothing I either want or can do beyond nursing, eating, drinking, sleeping, and loving and caring for my husband and babies, all of which I know is happiness of a kind, but why do I feel so woeful all the time, and weep as I did yesterday? I am writing this now with the pleasantly exciting sense that nobody will ever read it, so I can be quite frank with myself […].“

During her 12th pregnancy she wrote about taking scalding baths and jumping from high pieces of furniture to try and miscarry.  And at one point while reading her husband’s diary (which he told her to read) she found the sentence “There is no such thing as love, only the physical need for intercourse and the practical need for a life companion.” In her own diary she wrote “They ebb and flow like waves, these times when I realise how lonely I am and want only to cry…”

A few years before her husband’s death, she published a cycle of prose poems titled “Groans”, under the pseudonym “A Tired Woman”.

#tolstoy #sophia tolstoy #history #misogyny #gender roles

[zaebosdemon]

I think that Izutsumi and Mithrun would be friends but they're the kind of friends who sit in dead silence for three hours and aren't even entirely sure of each other's names. Izutsumi gives Mithrun the foods she doesn't like and he eats them without question, but then he says something completely out-of-pocket about the legal ramifications of free beastkin (which is out of date by thirty years anyway) and Izutsumi scratches the shit out of his arm and the next day they're back to being best buds. Izutsumi is the one who does "he asked for no pickles!" even though he did NOT ask for no pickles she just wants to steal his burger.

#dungeon meshi

[zaebosdemon]

moss piglet

#tardigrade

[zaebosdemon]

''Useless'' Writing Reminders

Save your documents. Strive to be safe, not sorry.

Back-up your documents. Strive to be safe, not sorry.

Placeholder names can quickly turn into forever names. Picking name(s) on a whim can lead to great things, or it can become your worst nightmare (😁).

Your writing has value. Yes, even the most inadequate of writing. You don't have to boast or even like everything you've ever written, but even the most questionable of writing will have contributed to your growth as a storyteller. Cherish it for what it is.

You can take a break. It is absolutely okay.

First drafts are scary. But you know what's more scary? Not having a draft at all.

Using clichés or ''overdone'' tropes will not kill your story. Firstly, tropes are building blocks. Secondly, humans actively search to consume stories revolving around these tropes.

Write your heart out. Boast about your writing. Boast about your friends' and fellow writers' writing. Everyone deserves recognition, even you, from within your own heart. (Sorry. That's really cheesy. But it's true).

#writeblr

[zaebosdemon]

Getting inspired to write is actually really easy! All you need to do is be the busiest you've ever been in your entire life and as far away from a computer as humanly possible. Hope this helps 🥰

#every time

[zaebosdemon]

meet the messiest drinker (sound on)

[source]

#hyena

[zaebosdemon]

#hyena #flamingo

[zaebosdemon]

revelation

#macabre #horror

[zaebosdemon]

#lol

[zaebosdemon]

BGM song: 我记得 (I Remember) - 赵雷 (Zhao Lei)

English added by me :)

#douyin #goat

[zaebosdemon]

A post-livestream meeting with Huahua

English added by me :)

#douyin #felidæ

[zaebosdemon]

What did Snape learn in the Shrieking Shack when he was under the clock?

Lupin broke off. There had been a loud creak behind him. The bedroom door had opened of its own accord. All five of them stared at it. Then Lupin strode towards it and looked out into the landing.

Enters Snape

‘No one there …’ ‘This place is haunted!’ said Ron. ‘It’s not,’ said Lupin, / ‘The Shrieking Shack was never haunted … the screams and howls the villagers used to hear were made by me.’ / ‘That’s where all of this starts – with my becoming a werewolf. None of this could have happened if I hadn’t been bitten … and if I hadn’t been so foolhardy …’ / ‘I was a very small boy when I received the bite. My parents tried everything, but in those days there was no cure. The Potion that Professor Snape has been making for me is a very recent discovery. It makes me safe, you see. As long as I take it in the week preceding the full moon, I keep my mind when I transform … I am able to curl up in my office, a harmless wolf, and wait for the moon to wane again. Before the Wolfsbane Potion was discovered, however, I became a fully fledged monster once a month. It seemed impossible that I would be able to come to Hogwarts. Other parents weren’t likely to want their children exposed to me. But then Dumbledore became Headmaster, and he was sympathetic. He said that, as long as we took certain precautions, there was no reason I shouldn’t come to school …’ Lupin sighed, and looked directly at Harry. ‘I told you, months ago, that the Whomping Willow was planted the year I came to Hogwarts. The truth is that it was planted because I had come to Hogwarts. This house –’ / ‘– the tunnel that leads to it – they were built for my use. Once a month, I was smuggled out of the castle, into this place, to transform. The tree was placed at the tunnel mouth to stop anyone coming across me while I was dangerous.’ / ‘My transformations in those days were – were terrible. It is very painful to turn into a werewolf. I was separated from humans to bite, so I bit and scratched myself instead. The villagers heard the noise and the screaming and thought they were hearing particularly violent spirits. Dumbledore encouraged the rumour … even now, when the house has been silent for years, the villagers don’t dare approach it …

Nothing Snape didn't know before.

‘But apart from my transformations, I was happier than I had ever been in my life. For the first time ever, I had friends, three great friends. Sirius Black … Peter Pettigrew … and, of course, your father, Harry – James Potter. ‘Now, my three friends could hardly fail to notice that I disappeared once a month. I made up all sorts of stories. I told them my mother was ill, and that I had to go home to see her … I was terrified they would desert me the moment they found out what I was. But of course, they, like you, Hermione, worked out the truth … ‘And they didn’t desert me at all. Instead they did something for me that would make my transformations not only bearable, but the best times of my life. They became Animagi.’

Snape has just learned that they became Animagi.

‘My dad, too?’ said Harry, astounded. ‘Yes, indeed,’ said Lupin. ‘It took them the best part of three years to work out how to do it. Your father and Sirius here were the cleverest students in the school, and lucky they were, because the Animagus transformation can go horribly wrong – one reason the Ministry keeps a close watch on those attempting to do it. Peter needed all the help he could get from James and Sirius. Finally, in our fifth year, they managed it. They could each turn into a different animal at will.’ ‘But how did that help you?’ said Hermione, sounding puzzled. ‘They couldn’t keep me company as humans, so they kept me company as animals,’ said Lupin. ‘A werewolf is only a danger to people. They sneaked out of the castle every month under James’s Invisibility Cloak. They transformed … Peter, as the smallest, could slip beneath the Willow’s attacking branches and touch the knot that freezes it. They would then slip down the tunnel and join me. Under their influence, I became less dangerous. My body was still wolfish, but my mind seemed to become less so while I was with them.’

Snape learns that Peter was the smallest Animagi, Lupin didn't mention him being a rat, just the smallest. That could be anything, Crookshanks, a cat, could slip under and touch the knot on the tree.

‘Hurry up, Remus,’ snarled Black who was still watching Scabbers with a horrible sort of hunger in his face.

From Snape's pov, Black is looking at Ron with a horrible sort of hunger in his face.

‘I’m getting there, Sirius, I’m getting there … well, highly exciting possibilities were open to us now we could all transform. Soon we were leaving the Shrieking Shack and roaming the school grounds and the village by night.

Snape has just learnt that they roamed the village and the school grounds.

Sirius and James transformed into such large animals, they were able to keep a werewolf in check. I doubt whether any Hogwarts students ever found out more about the Hogwarts grounds and Hogsmeade than we did … And that’s how we came to write the Marauder’s Map, and sign it with our nicknames. Sirius is Padfoot. Peter is Wormtail. James was Prongs.’

Still no mention of what animals they were.

‘What sort of animal –?’ Harry began, but Hermione cut across him. ‘That was still really dangerous! Running around in the dark with a werewolf! What if you’d given the others the slip, and bitten somebody?’ ‘A thought that still haunts me,’ said Lupin heavily. ‘And there were near misses, many of them. We laughed about them afterwards. We were young, thoughtless – carried away with our own cleverness.’

Snape has just learnt that Lupin could have bitten or killed people, many times. And betrayed Dumbledores trust.

‘I sometimes felt guilty about betraying Dumbledore’s trust, of course … he had admitted me to Hogwarts when no other Headmaster would have done so, and he had no idea I was breaking the rules he had set down for my own and others’ safety. He never knew I had led three fellow students into becoming Animagi illegally. But I always managed to forget my guilty feelings every time we sat down to plan our next month’s adventure. And I haven’t changed …’

Snape has just learnt that Lupin encouraged them to become Animagi. It may be out of context, as I highly doubt they needed any encouragement, but in Snape's eyes, that is how it would come across. And that he didn't feel bad enough about it to not do it again.

Lupin’s face had hardened, and there was self-disgust in his voice. ‘All this year, I have been battling with myself, wondering whether I should tell Dumbledore that Sirius was an Animagus. But I didn’t do it. Why? Because I was too cowardly. It would have meant admitting that I’d betrayed his trust while I was at school, admitting that I’d led others along with me … and Dumbledore’s trust has meant everything to me. He let me into Hogwarts as a boy, and he gave me a job, when I have been shunned all my adult life, unable to find paid work because of what I am. And so I convinced myself that Sirius was getting into the school using Dark Arts he learnt from Voldemort, that being an Animagus had nothing to do with it … so, in a way, Snape’s been right about me all along.’

Snape learns that Dumbledores trust meant more to Lupin than the safety of the students and staff. Even after Black broke in twice.

‘Snape?’ said Black harshly,/ ‘What’s Snape got to do with it?’ ‘He’s here, Sirius,’ said Lupin heavily. ‘He’s teaching here as well.’ He looked up at Harry, Ron and Hermione. ‘Professor Snape was at school with us. He fought very hard against my appointment to the Defence Against the Dark Arts job. He has been telling Dumbledore all year that I am not to be trusted. He has his reasons … you see, Sirius here played a trick on him which nearly killed him, a trick which involved me –’ Black made a derisive noise. ‘It served him right,’ he sneered. ‘Sneaking around, trying to find out what we were up to … hoping he could get us expelled …’ ‘Severus was very interested in where I went every month,’ Lupin told Harry, Ron and Hermione. ‘We were in the same year, you know, and we – er – didn’t like each other very much. He especially disliked James. Jealous, I think, of James’s talent on the Quidditch pitch … anyway, Snape had seen me crossing the grounds with Madam Pomfrey one evening as she led me towards the Whomping Willow to transform. Sirius thought it would be – er – amusing, to tell Snape all he had to do was prod the knot on the tree-trunk with a long stick, and he’d be able to get in after me.

Snape learns that Lupin is downplaying this and making it sound that it is Snape's fault. He makes them think that he was jealous of James, which is why he didn't like him.

Well, of course, Snape tried it – if he’d got as far as this house, he’d have met a fully grown werewolf – but your father, who’d heard what Sirius had done, went after Snape and pulled him back, at great risk to his life …

Snape learns that Lupin thinks James is a hero

Snape glimpsed me, though, at the end of the tunnel. He was forbidden to tell anybody by Dumbledore, but from that time on he knew what I was …’ ‘So that’s why Snape doesn’t like you,’ said Harry slowly, ‘because he thought you were in on the joke?’

Enters Snape again

Nowhere does Lupin mention Peter being alive, Peter being a rat, Sirius being innocent, that Sirus is not there to kill Harry.

Nowhere does Lupin give Snape reasons to trust him. He just found out how untrustworthy he has been, as a student and as a teacher.

All Lupin and Black say to try and convince Snape to trust or listen to him that Sirius is not a murderer, it's Peter is...

'You haven't heard everything - I can explain - Sirius isn't here to kill Harry,' / 'Is a schoolboy grudge worth putting an innocent man back inside Azkaban?

Where has Lupin suggested that Sirius was ever innocent except then? So why would Snape listen to him now?

BANG! Thin, snake-like cords burst from the end of Snape’s wand and twisted themselves around Lupin’s mouth, wrists and ankles; he overbalanced and fell to the floor, unable to move. With a roar of rage, Black started towards Snape

Yes, Sirius, that is going to get the man to listen to you.

'You've got to hear me out,'

No, he doesn't actually. What valid reasons have you given for him to hear you out?

'As long as this boy brings his rat up to the castle,' / 'the rat - look at the rat,'

In Snape's pov, why would he look at a rat? What has a rat got to do with this?

Harry and Hermione butt in - knock him unconscious. Next:

‘Thank you, Harry,’ he said. ‘I’m still not saying I believe you,’ Harry retorted. ‘Then it’s time we offered you some proof,’ said Black. ‘You, boy – give me Peter. Now.'

Now (and before Snape entered) they refer to the rat as Peter / Peter as the rat. Not once do they (H, R H inc) give Snape any indication that the rat is an animagus named Peter Pettigrew.

If Lupin didn't fanny about reminiscing about his school days and the dangerous stuff they did, and betraying Dumbledore (giving Snape plenty reasons not to trust him) and just get straight to the bloody point, then maybe Snape would have heard this instead:

‘I’m still not saying I believe you,’ Harry retorted. ‘Then it’s time we offered you some proof,’ said Black. ‘You, boy – give me Peter. Now.' Ron clutched Scabbers closer to his chest. ‘Come off it,’ he said weakly. ‘Are you trying to say you broke out of Azkaban just to get your hands on Scabbers? I mean …’ he looked up at Harry and Hermione for support. ‘OK, say Pettigrew could turn into a rat – there are millions of rats – how’s he supposed to know which one he’s after if he was locked up in Azkaban?’

[zaebosdemon]

Words of the Day

sybaritic: fond of sensuous luxury or pleasure; self-indulgent.

Stygian void: extremely dark, gloomy, or forbidding the stygian blackness of the cave.

stochastic: randomly determined; having a random probability distribution or pattern that may be analyzed statistically but may not be predicted precisely.

morass: an area of muddy or boggy ground./ a complicated or confused situation.

scion: a descendant of a notable family.

phoneme:  any of the perceptually distinct units of sound in a specified language that distinguish one word from another (for example p, b, d, and t in the English words pad, pat, bad, and bat)

rhotacism: the historical change of a voiced consonant sound (such as the alveolar consonants \z\, \d\, \l\ or \n\) to an r-like consonant

bon mot: a witty remark

precocial: (of a young bird or other animal) hatched or born in an advanced state and able to feed itself almost immediately.

diacritical:(of a mark or sign) serving to indicate different pronunciations of a letter above or below which it is written.

libidinal: relating to the libido.

neurocysticercosis:a preventable parasitic infection caused by larval cysts (enclosed sacs containing the immature stage of a parasite) of the pork tapeworm (Taenia solium).

cruciferous:relating to or denoting plants of the cabbage family (Brassicaceae, formerly Cruciferae ).

vibrissae: long stiff hairs growing around the mouth or elsewhere on the face of many mammals, used as organs of touch; whiskers.

acculterate: cultural modification of an individual, group, or people by adapting to or borrowing traits from another culture/ a merging of cultures as a result of prolonged contact

#words #english #language

[zaebosdemon]

Words of the Day

bête noire: a person or thing that one particularly dislikes

paeans: a song of praise or triumph.

paraphyletic: (of a group of organisms) descended from a common evolutionary ancestor or ancestral group, but not including all the descendant groups.

dysphemism: a derogatory or unpleasant term used instead of a pleasant or neutral one, such as “loony bin” for “mental hospital.”.

Gray (nuclear radiation): The international system (SI) unit of radiation dose expressed in terms of absorbed energy per unit mass of tissue. The gray is the unit of absorbed dose and has replaced the rad. 1 gray = 1 Joule/kilogram and also equals 100 rad.

avoirdupois: a system of weights based on a pound of 16 ounces or 7,000 grains, widely used in English-speaking countries./ weight, heavyness

troy ounces: A unit of weight used for precious metals, specifically for gold and silver. A troy ounce is equal to about 1.1 avoirdupois ounces, 480 grains, or 31.04 grams. The term is believed to be named after a weight used at the annual fair held at Troyes, France during the Middle Ages.

dirndl: a full, wide skirt with a tight waistband./ a woman's dress in the style of Alpine peasant costume, with a full skirt and a close-fitting bodice.

abeyance: a state of temporary disuse or suspension.

bupkis: nothing at all.

bastinadoing: A beating with a stick or cudgel, especially on the soles of the feet.

avuncular:  relating to an uncle.

efflorescence: the state or a period of flowering.an example or result of growth and development:/ (chemistry)  the migration of a salt to the surface of a porous material, where it forms a coating./ (pathology) a rash or eruption of the skin.

munificent: (of a gift or sum of money) larger or more generous than is usual or necessary.

esoteric: designed for or understood by the specially initiated alone/ requiring or exhibiting knowledge that is restricted to a small group/ difficult to understand

#words #english #language

[zaebosdemon]

Words of the day

enmity (used to be enemity): a feeling or condition of hostility; hatred; ill will; animosity; antagonism.

adventive: not native and usually not yet well established, as exotic plants or animals.

glabrous: (chiefly of the skin or a leaf) free from hair or down; smooth.

snath: the shaft or handle of a scythe.

cavil: make petty or unnecessary objections.

aposematism:  biological means by which a dangerous, or noxious, organism advertises its dangerous nature to a potential predator.

amity could shatter into mutual animus.

animus: hostility or ill feeling./ motivation to do something.

acrimonious:  (typically of speech or a debate) angry and bitter.

disproportionation: a reaction in which a substance is simultaneously oxidized and reduced, giving two different products.

demos: the common people of an ancient Greek state.the populace as a political unit, especially in a democracy.

suppurative: the formation of, conversion into, or process of discharging pus

abstruse: difficult to understand; obscure.

apodosis: the clause expressing the consequence in a conditional sentence, often beginning with then, as “then I will” in “If you go, then I will.”

eschatology: the part of theology concerned with death, judgment, and the final destiny of the soul and of humankind.

#words #english #language

[zaebosdemon]

RobinLaw Drabble II

gift for @manicmic again late, sorry!

Words: 849 Rating: Gen Pairing: Robin/Law

"And this is my cabin so...yeah..." Law trailed off awkwardly as he let Robin into his living quarters. He was annoyed with himself for being nervous. He was Trafalgar Law! He was cool and stoic! He was the merciless captain of the Heart Pirates! Still, just an hour he had learned that Robin was four years older than him, and for some reason this information rattled him.

He forcibly suppressed his urge to fidget while Robin took a small tour of his cabin, moving gracefully and quietly, keeping her hands behind her back as if she was in a museum. If anything, she was the stoic one. Her face only showed a mild fascination as she looked over surgical instruments, swords and daggers, old wanted posters of Doflamingo that had been used for dart practice and various bits of stolen loot scattered on every surface. Belatedly he wished he has straightened up a little before inviting her. 

"You don't keep any posters of yourself?" Her question snapped him out of his thoughts. "Huh? You mean wanted posters? No, why would I?" "Hmmm, we keep ours at our ship. My captain Luffy likes to compare his bounty to the other boys'. They seem to make a competition out of it, even though Luffy's has been the highest for a while."

Law could not keep from harrumphing. "That's so childish!  It's exactly the sort of nonsense he gets up to all the time!" In the back of his mind, in a way he would never admit to anyone, he wondered what the exact difference was between his bounty and Luffy's.

Robin laughed. It was a strange, seeing her geniunely chuckle. "You say that, and yet he's your friend." "He's NOT my friend, he just made that decision one day and started calling me Traffy out of nowhere! I certainly didn't have any input over this!" "But if you truly hated him, you could get rid oh him. Not in a fight of course, but by being cruel in the ways he hates." Robin's clear eyes pierced into his. She wasn't even challenging him, she was merely stating something. And it was a fact. 

Rather than answering, Law took off his furry hat and sat down heavily on the bed while sighing loudly. "Robin-ya, did you come here just to tease me?" She laughed again, this time a bit more quietly. "Maybe, though I also want to spend time with you." She picked up one of the sharp scalpels. "What is this used for? It looks like it could be quite handy for stabbing."

They spent a while talking about his various surgical instruments and their uses. Robin's questions made it clear she had no medical training, but made it up with quite a macabre imagination. If Law hadn't known about her past as Miss All Sunday, he would have guessed she was an assassin anyway.

Their conversation flowed easily and before long Law lost his nervousness as well as his track for time. When he glanced to the window he noticed it was pitch black. Had they been talking for hours? "Oh wow, it's late, do you need to g-" But he never got to finish his sentence. Her lips were suddenly on his and she was leaning her whole body forward, almost daring him to catch her. Law froze for a moment, but he instinctually kissed her back. After another moment's indecision he put his hands on her hips, not bringing her for a closer embrace but not pushing her away either.

She released the kiss and looked at him again with those piercing eyes. Law wanted to say something, but he felt breathless. With a smooth motion, Robin took off the sunglasses that had been resting on her forehead this whole time, folded them shut and set them on the table. Suddenly panic surged in Law again. "Wait!" She paused, her hands in midair, waiting to hear his objection. "I can't do that so quickly- I mean, not...not right now. It's too soon." He stammered. Her face, which had been a mask of pleasant neutrality nearly all evening, softened to something he had not seen before. She leaned forward again, and he shut his eyes, but she kissed him on the forehead instead of the lips.

"We don't have to do anything you don't want to." She retrieved her sunglasses and hung them from her shirt. "But Law-kun, I'm impressed. You knew what I wanted to do just from that." She stretched and leaned back on his bed until she was laying on it, though he feet were still on the floor. "You're good at reading people. I like that." "Hazards of the job I suppose...I have to know who to trust." She smiled at him and closed her eyes, almost looking like she was going to fall asleep right then and there. That was something that Law liked about her. She didn't belabor things unnecessarily, and knew when to drop things. He took off his long coat and laid down beside her, though he didn't close his eyes.

#one piece #robinlaw #Nico Robin #trafalgar law

[zaebosdemon]

Words of the day

vituperate: blame or insult (someone) in strong or violent language.

didactic: intended to teach, particularly in having moral instruction as an ulterior motive.

preternatural: beyond what is normal or natural.

reification: to consider or represent (something abstract) as a material or concrete thing : to give definite content and form to (a concept or idea). treating something immaterial as a material thing

synod: an assembly of the clergy and sometimes also the laity in a diocese or other division of a particular Church.

laity: lay people, as distinct from the clergy.

diocesan: of or concerning a diocese.

ecumenical: representing a number of different Christian Churches.

artifactual: denoting or relating to an object made by a human being, typically one of cultural or historical interest.

stridulation: (of an insect, especially a male cricket or grasshopper) make a shrill sound by rubbing the legs, wings, or other parts of the body together.

contentious: causing or likely to cause an argument; controversial./  involving heated argument.

stelae: an upright stone slab or column typically bearing a commemorative inscription or relief design, often serving as a gravestone.

prosaic: having the style or diction of prose; lacking poetic beauty.

lapidarist: a worker who cuts, polishes, and engraves precious stones

philatelist: stamp collector

historiography: the study of historical writing.

#words #english #language