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“I’m a mess That don’t rhyme with shit, it’s just true”

— Childish Gambino

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“I’m a mess That don’t rhyme with shit, it’s just true”

— Childish Gambino

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Debbie Harry, 1977

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Life: The Biggest Troll

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So I’m staying at a friend’s house in Boston

And in their guest room is a door.

And my first thought was closet. Just an ordinary, tiny, New England closet.

But no!

There are STAIRS in that closet!

Now where do those stairs go, you may ask?

Up to the black void attic of course.

But you know, it doesn’t seem to end there.

Because for reasons no one seems to know, this door deadbolts from inside. There’s nothing but a black void up there. Why must it lock on that side of it???

Of course, it was then that I spotted something else.

Why yes, those ARE scratch marks on the inside of the door. Which, one might think dog because they’re so low on the door (only a third of the way up).

But you know, this wouldn’t be fun if that was all there was.

That deadbolt has scratches all around it too.

Funzies!

Because guess what.

That deadbolt is five feet off the ground. And there is no dog in this house tall enough to reach it.

Pretty sure I just entered a horror film.

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“You want a house, I’ll get you a house. You wanna get the fuck out of here, we’ll get out of here. I got that trailer. I’ll get a truck, we’ll hit the road. You pick a place you like, we’ll stop. You don’t wanna be there? ‘Fuck you,’ we’re outta there.” The Place Beyond the Pines, 2013 (dir. Derek Cianfrance)

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Stuck in my own dark cloud again.

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spend that money fast if i had to 👹

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🦂

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