#'YOUR SHAME IS SAFE WITH US' followed by olga liking marshmallows lmao that was silly

[safyresky]

So I've only watched this last week's (this has been in my drafts for WAY too long) episode once (I usually do it twice but have yet to do a second watch and feel a rewatch will be in order at some point) but I have been rotating it around in my head since tscs mutuals first started posting their thoughts and I have SO MANY thoughts because this episode ONCE AGAIN packed soo many things in one go. Why don't they understand how PACING works? My GOD.

Anyway~

My initial thoughts before even watching the episode were "this is whack". Here's why.

This is episode 3.

Of 6.

We are halfway through. And our antagonist (Mad Santa) and Protagonist (Santa Scott) have yet to cross paths. And post watching S2E3, Mad Santa only JUST got his hands on some North Pole magic.

THREE EPISODES IN. HALFWAY THROUGH.

Do you know how much stuff is going to be packed into the next THREE EPISODES? Let me make a list (bc I LOVE lists)

Mad Santa getting back to the Pole

The obligatory "I've failed ):" from Santa Scott when Mad Santa gets to the Pole

Mad Santa GETTING to the Pole

The Council giving Scott 3 months to get Cal shipshape, and episode 3 starting with Olga saying IT'S BEEN THREE MONTHS.

(ALREADY????)

So we still have THAT to look forward to, assuming they even LISTEN to their own boundary, since we know this show's track record with continuity is. Bad.

PLUS we still have a Sandman cameo coming! And a big old snowball to be thrown in Scott's face! (I have my clown shoes on)

Carol is STILL trying to find the missing nutcracker. She has gotten no closer; her trail is so cold she's looking at JACK as a suspect (yes I saw the cameo too, absolutely delightful for us Jack stans on main)

(pun absolutely intended)

Cal and Sandy are only JUST talking to one another about how their magic training is going, and are only JUST like. Diving into the drawbacks of being raised up North AND NEVER GOING ANYWHERE as well as the trauma that must be there from experiencing life in the real world, ENJOYING IT, and being yanked back to the Pole for the "family business"

Befana and Sandy. So THAT is a thing that was lovely then fell apart for no good reason--it was ONE MISTAKE and could've been handled better Befana, come ON girlie!

Easter Bunny being turned back into his EB form (tho tbh we should keep him as a bunny. Sorry not sorry, I have always been an EB hater on main)

Cal dealing with A) first heartbreak over Riley (which was stupid, more on that later) B) not wanting to be/do the Santa thing BECAUSE of a MULTITUDE of reasons he has NOT shared with Scott and C) the fallout when he realizes the vest is gone. He is NOT going to tell his parents at ALL. His whole existence practically rides on "I gotta make Dad proud!" and this deffs won't do it, but HEY! Maybe the writers will surprise me and he'll be OPEN and HONEST with his Dad!

Bc let's be real, ALL OF THEIR PROBLEMS COULD BE SOLVED WITH OPEN COMMUNICATION

I am off topic. Deep breaths. Whew. SO. We have all THAT to focus on.

PLUS Sandy's powers! She's apparently more powerful than Befana thought? Sandy now has to deal with that SANS her mentor and I DOUBT Carol will be helpful with that. She WOULD'VE BEEN in the MOVIES. But SERIES CAROL? APPARENTLY NOT FUCKING LIKELY SINCE ALL OF HER CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT HAS GONE OUT THE DOOR FOR TOKEN FEMINISM THAT IS IMMEDIATELY CHECKED OFF A LIST AND MADE IRRELEVANT WITH THE PLOT OF "One woman is jealous of another woman"

Oh my god off topic again. SORRY. RIGHT. So, we have Sandra's magic to deal with still. Her mentor/mentee relationship with Befana. Cal's own magical struggles and his relationship with his Dad in terms of Mentor/Mentee. These kids need THERAPY, SOMEONE CALL NEIL

SO ALL OF THAT. IS GOING TO BE JAM PACKED INTO THESE LAST THREE EPISODES. AND I JUST KNOW (based on last season) THE RESOLUTIONS WILL NOT PAY OFF.

So yeah, thems the opening thoughts (with some watch thoughts leaking in, admittedly).

AS FOR THE EPISODE ITSELF.

OH BOY.

It's still very mid. It gives a lot of good bits but either A) contradicts them or B) gives them not enough time to flourish (see: Carol and Befana for A, and Cal and Sandra for B). It is also STILL ignoring its own continuity, and not just from the movies, but from literally the first two episodes of the season!

Did Cupid not say. One to two episodes ago. "Hey Santa, we, the Council, aren't really sure about this Cal thing? So uh. You've got three months. and if it's not working out. We're calling it."

And did Olga not say. At the start of this episode. "It's been THREE MONTHS since we escaped and we are NO CLOSER" yadda yadda yadda.

So THREE MONTHS have passed between THIS EPISODE, AND THE LAST ONE?

SO WHERE THE HELL IS THE COUNCIL? HELLO???

I actually thought that that would be like, the big crunch time thing for the series, you know? THE plot motivator. Or at least, one of many. Like I was expecting a montage and for each episode to have a month packed in and for the final episode to involve resetting everything to Scott's ideal status quo and defeating Mad Santa and Olga. Needless to say, I was SHOOK when they opened with THAT.

Olga and Magnus are fucking hilarious, full stop. I kinda want Olga to do a stab ngl!! Their whole dynamic has been interesting lol.

The Judy cameo was a fun Easter egg, but it's a shame they didn't give it a bit more hype, you know? That would've been fun. The Jack cameo (if we can even call it that) was ALSO a fun Easter Egg, tho I am much too mad at Carol's writers rn to be like WOO JACK. But you bet your ASS I saw that lil easter egg, lol. It's kinda frustrating? They keep throwing these lil cameos/easter eggs at us like it's an attempt to placate us or smth. Idk, I am tired and JADED and Don't Trust Like That.

Right so what else. Going in for round two. Wish me luck:

Agree with ALL OF YOU about the poor elves being used as reindeer stand ins 🙄🙄 AWFUL. SOMEONE KNOCK THIS GUY OFF A ROOF FOR GOOD! DAMN! (Santa not Cal)

Sandra and Carol. GOD. So much cringe! SO MUCH! BECAUSE OF BAD PARENTING. HOW DO THEY SUCK SO MUCH AT BEING PARENTS? WE ALREADY HAD 3 MOVIES OF THIS AND CAROL WAS NEVER A W F U L

(RIP spider on Carol's shoulder)

Carol and Scott talking about the kids was just. They are SO OUT OF TOUCH. AND SCOTT HAS A SISTER??? I DO NOT BELIEVE THIS PERIODT. He has only child energy, and wow did he EVER suck at reassuring Carol. Anyone else sick of Old White Men? Anyone?

Sandra reading the transformation spell and then accidentally doing it is deffs foreshadowing. She's gonna transform the SHIT out of Magnus, calling it NOW

EB HAS APPEARED! KIDNAPPED BY OLGA! ICONIC! And they were PALS??? Magnus I am so intrigued. Who Are You

And obligatory "BLERG BLAH CONTINUITY" re: EB being there all the way back then

NTS: There is an Easter Gopher too. I am taking notes.

Scott being an undignified, pathetic name: GET HIS ASS (count: 9)

EB is so wrong about Peeps. He is falling lower and lower on my list of Legendary Figures. Him laying the egg. Cool EB magic, disgusting execution. I am 99% sure bunnies don't even LAY EGGS

Where tf do they get the eggs from???

OKAY CAL AND SANDRA

Love that they're having sibling bonding. "doing it for everyone but yourself" GET HIS ASS, SANDY. (GHA Count for Cal: 1). Hate how short the scene was and how it boiled down to a sort of silly joke (being a crossguard instead of Santa). Like. They could;ve axed the dinner with Noel scene, cut tight to Santa training Buddy (Cal), and after that debacle moved on to sibling scene and having them bond. Like. There is substance and it is there but it is not being well executed. LET THE KIDS HAVE ROOM FOR GROWTH! (but dani! we have 3 more episodes to go! SEE MY FIRST LIST! THEY DON'T HAVE THE TIME!)

Santa asking for a jetpack and Carol being like "don't force your son up there to get over the heights thing" and then telling him to just say "I love you and I'm proud", GET HIS ASS (GHA Count Scott Edition: 10. And we're not even halfway through the episode). GOD. I wish Carol would take her own advice re: Santa and Cal and apply it to Sandra and Herself, come the fuck ON guys. DO BETTER.

DINNER WITH BEFANA (Scott: can't make it Carol: Gonna kill him. GET HIS ASS)

Cool idea, HORRIBLE execution. I am not a fan of how Carol was like "woo! ladies being ladies!" and them immediately we get a plotline of her being jealous of another woman. It's very. Token/preformative feminism. It's like they are checking items off of a list. I dislike how SHALLOW most of these subjects are in the series. Like, if you don't know how to handle something like that, THEN DON'T WRITE IT. GOD.

Like. When Sandy lifts the salt with magic, SUPPORT IT. Don't be like I NEED TO ONE UP IT. Also, interesting that Mrs. Claus. Despite being Legendary by marriage. Doesn't have magic?? I think she should. GIVE CAROL MAGIC 2k23. Carol overreacted and then so did Sandy and I just think that this whole La Befana/Mrs. Claus plotline could've been done better!

Especially Befana inviting Carol over and then Carol promptly asking if she should bring a broom, something something, witch stereotypes being a thinly veiled allusion to magical racism something something

I BET IF BUDDY HAD GONE WITH CHARLIE TO THE "CLUB" HE WOULD'VE GOT IN JUST FINE

"Are you talking to the float or me" I am SO angry for Cal/Buddy. The poor kid thinks his Dad is super not proud of him, his whole existence seems to hinge on his dad's approval and I am so upset about all the implications of this I'm gonna explode things with my MIND

"Hare to the throne" Cal you are so stupid. And my GOD the Hare vs Heir argument being the reason Sandy explodes things like I just. That could've been done better.

This whole SCENE could've been done better! Befana didn't need to be so mean! It was an ACCIDENT. She explains it loud and clear and what do you MEAN something else entirely I'm SCREAMING. Befana being like we're stepping back? Like. UGH. And then the jealousy thing? Oh wow! More pitting ladies against ladies! GOD. I'm so upset about this whole thing it's unreal ):<

OKAY. SO THE SLEIGH STEALING SCENE AND WHERE THAT GOES.

WE LOVE TO SEE BUDDY AND SANDRA BONDING! STEALING THE SLEIGH! (not to get all OCs on main but JACQUELINE APPROVES). I love to see them working together to be delinquents, but my GOD the Riley thing

UGH

Like. I know we're supposed to feel bad for Buddy but like, the whole romance between him and Riley has been so ick and the way their breakup went. It was like. You KNOW. It was written to be poignant with lines like "you're always busy with your dad" and "I want you to dust me so that you never met me" which would have worked if. You know. They weren't FIVE. (16-18). It just didn't work :\. I haven't had time to like, enjoy them and they made Riley very, very. Unlikable tbh.

ALSO. Cal from CALGARY? As a Canadian, THERE ARE A BUNCH OF OTHER PLACES YOU COULD'VE PICKED! VANCOUVER? TORONTO? YOU WENT WITH CAL FROM CALGARY? I can't with y'all. ALSO. THEY DID SCHOOL TOGETHER FOR A YEAR. I FEEL AS THOUGH THE KIDS SHOULD KNOW WHO HE IS. OH YEAH THAT WEIRD EXCHANGE STUDENT WE HAD FOR A YEAR. Y'ALL ARE DOING LONG DISTANCE? SUPER! LIKE. HELLO???

Kudos to Sandra for being the funniest bitch alive with the creeping in the corner like "That was rough af bud." It's giving

ehehehe.

And FINALLY Mad Santa has his magic back. Here's how I'm guessing the next episode is going to work:

Mad Santa practises using his magic to make Santaopolis all fancy smancy

Manages to make it up north by the end of the episode

Cal has a fallout with his Dad over the Santa vest thing

It becomes a bigger deal than expected

Sandy cameo probably bc EB is missing and he was last seen THERE (Man Santa, you're really getting on the Council's radar in all the bad ways, huh? Putting Jack to shame! 273 counts of attempted upstaging of Santa vs how many billion counts of magical exposure? And an EB kidnapping? Bc I bet that'll be a thing posited next episode)

As if La Befana can't undo a spell (I AM ROLLING MY EYES)

They will make ZERO progress on figuring out who Mad Santa is and they will be very confused when he makes it to the North Pole next episode

I also tho wouldn't be surprised if they stretch Mad Santa getting to the Pole to episode 6. That seems on brand for how they treat pacing (as if it does not exist).

tl;dr: too much preformative stuff. very mid. Cal and Sandy are fun but I wish they were given more time to shine! Pour one out for our boy Noel who is having a rough go of it tbh and Kris too who's gonna get back from Costco very, very confused

#other thoughts: noel having the claus's over for food was fun. wish it had had a point aside from a scene transition #'YOUR SHAME IS SAFE WITH US' followed by olga liking marshmallows lmao that was silly #THEN THEY TRIED TO RIDESHARE WITH A GOAT??? amazing. #the santa clauses #tscs #dani watches tscs #long post #tscs wank #bc this isn't very positive and if y'all see this and are enjoying the series? i strongly suggest scrolling past it! #dani speaks