#and like there is another guy would fare similarly to me so it's very bullshit that I get treated differently imo

[autogeneity]

getting increasingly annoyed about instructor saying I shouldn't compete in sparring

#it's so frustrating!! to go to a competition do a pattern and then sit there for 6 hours while everyone else does things #and like #it would be maybe okay if he gave me like a threshold of some kind #like ok in this much time or when you have done/are able to do X or when you are at X belt or whatever #just something! you know? #ntch #m #whining #tbc I still suck I would absolutely get wrecked #well today I would've been against a friend from our own school if I'd taken part and he probably wouldn't kill me but generally #he's brilliant and still went through it lol so I would probably be pretty fucked #however I still want to. #I mean I'd do badly but I don't actually think the risk of being like. maimed. is as high as instructor seems to think #and like there is another guy would fare similarly to me so it's very bullshit that I get treated differently imo #I think my bones are fine. probably. #I lift a lot I've been on T for almost 2 years I think it is fine. #a year ago I understood but the more time passes the more it becomes unfair