#he's never been autobalanced tbh

[cleaner-in-grey]

The young German Spy made his way out of bed and then decided to have a nice little look around the base to see what he was dealing with. He was on the BLU team as far as he knew and he wasn't yet retired.

He lights up his first cigarette of the day, taking a drag and exhaling with a smile on his face. BLU really pulled through to get their spies some really good shit, fancier than RED's.

"Those poor little bastards,"he cooed to himself in German, chuckling, "Can't get good quality from those who don't know quality. Bunch of classless hicks."

#and yet he falls for a RED engineer so that says something on his taste #open sjdhfjksd #he's so mean #he's never been autobalanced tbh #he'd be so fucking pissed because their cigarettes are shit and people on RED are a little rough around the edges #he likes sophistication...and yet....again he fell for and had a child with a RED engineer #then when he's in his 40's he falls for another RED Engineer #and he went to a shooting competition in texas after a target and sleeps with one of the contestants after