#i'm happy i didn't have my lecture/lab section today bc i haven't done anything in that time

[kuiinncedes]

bfskflkdsjf

#why do i make such a big deal out of everything in my head #i feel like every once in a while i just come on and make a post like this LOL #but like why does it feel so big and bad and then i just gotta talk abt it for a sec but like #bro it all stems from idk what my relationship w this person on board is #i don't think she dislikes me and i like her but we're not close at all and i just kinda like don't know where i stand #i just like did technically her task for her bc she has two exams today and i feel bad that i like kinda overstepped #but i'm sure she's probably fine w it #but also idk bc i dont know her that well lol #but like it's rly not that big of a dealllllllll 😭😭😭 #also bc i feel kinda awkward around her for no good reason just bc we never rly bonded dkjnfbdhsfkgjhdff #but i dont have her number so i can only dm her over discord and i dont think she checks that often #so anoter person on board who i was talking to abt stuff was like i'll just text her #and then like it's a whole thing when there's indirect communication coming one way and other direct communication the other way #and it just felt awkward bc she said one thing to the other person and then saw my message being like sorry jk im jus gonna do it #bc time sensitive 😭 and ik u have exams to worry abt and she told other person she would do it in a bit #but before that to both of them i was just like i'll just do it so we have it sooner rather than later but they didnt see that until after #and it literallyyyyyy DOESN'T MATTERRRRRRRRR but i hate that and it makes me feel bad lmfao #i just need to chill 💀 #i'm happy i didn't have my lecture/lab section today bc i haven't done anything in that time #and i can say that it's fine bc i usually wouldn't have done anything in this time LMFAO #i just wish i was better friends w this person so i don't overthink every interaction i have with her like why is that necessary @ brain #idk how to liek make that happen tho i feel like we're both similarly like #comfortable in friend group and then don't branch out that much #or like a little awkward w branching out #idk bro i also feel like their friend group seems like the cool kids in our club lol not in a bad way #but for some reason i'm kinda intimidated/awkward around them #ugh anwyay .... i need to like get over this w her and def the prev director who i would also say is big in that firend group #bc i feel so awkward talkign to them and asking them things but they're probably the ppl i need to talk to the most #but my own fucking awkwardness is stopping me and i just need to shut up to myself lmao #anyway fucking that's over i need to go write 1000 words :DDD