#kit's diary 7 🖊

[v-tired-queer]

I have been awake for twenty straight hours now, so as I lay here upside down on my bed, here's a list of things I've learned and done in that time, in no particular order:

Got jazzed on some energy drinks

Got my bangs cut (I can see now! 😃)

Brought in a bed

Assembled the bed hours after bringing it in

Went through two storage boxes and tossed what I no longer need or want

Found a lot of condoms and dental dams that are still within the expiration date but I don't need (1. virgin 2. ttc next year 3. high school me really thought I'd be getting some but the only thing I got was depression RIP 4. on the asexual spectrum)

Reorganized my jewelry

Ate some ice cream (it was neopolitan 🤍🤎🩷)

Reorganized my books

Watched some YouTube videos

Watched some funny animal videos on TikTok

Wondered if he actually thinks I'm pretty

Wondered what his voice sounds like

Questioned my romantic orientation

Missed a call from Social Security Administration (gotta call them back on Monday)

Downloaded an important document from the Social Security website and learned that you can adopt a kid while on disability which was something I didn't know

Designated a whole notebook to adulting notes (it's essentially a whole notebook dedicated to that moment when you're frantically looking for a peice of paper to write this very important thing down) (I now carry it in my purse)

Cleaned out my purse

Got sad when I discovered that my hand sanitizer is too big for my jack-o-lantern hand sanitizer holder keychain

Got annoyed with That Aunt who decided to spend the night

Pet my mom's dog (x100)

Had some pretty good macaroni and cheese

Had some more ice cream

Was in pain because I'm lactose intolerance

Maintained annoyance with That Aunt

Greatly missed my dad's side of the family and then my dad but then his side even more

Cleaned out my closet

Organized my clothes

Set up my altar for the autumn season and added a picture of Mother Mary and Baby Jesus

Took my medication a half hour late but hey I still took it so yay!

Checked my email (nothing fun or important)

Swept my floor

Made my bed

Accidentally drank more caffeine without realizing it

Listened to country songs

Moved some wall decor to a different wall in my bedroom

Stretched

Switched to water

Took an ovulation test (I think it was positive but it was hard to tell--the lines looked almost the same but maybe not quite enough to be positive)

Took out the trash

Daydreampt about being a parent and picking my kids up from school and helping them with their homework at the kitchen table with a snack of homemade chocolate chip cookies

Craved chocolate chip cookies

Did not get any chocolate chip cookies

Hung out with my mom

Thought about how cute his smile is

Thought about how cute her smile is

Accidentally broke my glasses (again) (big oopsie) (they were cheaters from the dollar store so no big deal but still)

Decided what I want done with my body in the event that I die (context: I broke a tombstone Halloween decoration that I had and it made me think of cemeteries and then I thought of my local cemetery aka my Happy Place and thus, the I Wanna Be Cremated and Then Have My Ashes Burried There thoughts commenced)

Decided that it would be really cute if my mom, my brother and I all had matching sashes for my baby shower (mine--Mommy to Be; my mom's--Nana to Be; my brother's--Uncle to Be)

Found my military coin from when I was in JROTC in high school and put it back in my wallet for the ✨️nostalgia✨️

Got hungry but forgot to eat (oops)

Hung up my clothes in the closet

Learned how to clean the silver earring holder that my mom gave me years ago (so shiny now!)

Filled up my box of crystals and rocks (!!!)

Was genuinely not depressed or anxious for the first time in weeks

Accidentally said I don't drink coffee when actually I love coffee but only if it's iced and doused in sugar but I've had enough caffeine and it was to That Aunt so actually it's fine

Stayed hydrated after I switched to water

Checked the weather forecast

Swore a lot (fuck was my favorite word)

Made a shopping list

#how the fuck do i tag this #turns out i do and think a lot when i'm not depressed #who would have guessed #lmfao #what i did today #no sleep #i did not sleep last night #insomnia #insomniac #kit's diary 7 🖊 #i am very tired