#maisie peters vc: oh lord i'm going back to therapy! therapy!

[palismet]

because you're a weapon and weapons don't weep / what is a lineage if not a gold thread of pride and guilt / if i let him do this to me, what else will i allow? anything, anything, anything / nothing else matters when he loves me and nothing else matters when he doesn't / i know i should go but i follow you like a man possessed / i am the sword (if i'm not the sword, who am i?) / i will wait for the next time you want me like a dog with a bird outside your door / i am dirty, infinitely dirty, this is why i scream so much about purity / grief taught me inhumane things / if you're raised with an angry man in your house, there will always be an angry man in your house / but you have to satisfy the monster. the monster has loved you for longer than anyone else / anything i've ever let go of has had claw marks on it / if you killed me, would you make it good? would you make it holy? / god loves you but not enough to save you.

#maisie peters vc: oh lord i'm going back to therapy! therapy! #oh god i'm gonna wring out all of the religious trauma out of this story like a man possessed. POSSESSED #HOW DO YOU LOVE / LIKE A FIST / LIKE A KNIFE !!!!!!!! #I KNOW WHAT IS AND ISN'T MINE !!!!!!! #coughs. tucks all of these back in my pockets. i'm fine i'm cool i'm so normal. completely normal. #scribbles.