#[ especially for yelan who has such a... god; it's almost an unhealthy headspace. you can't mesh that with just anyone. ]

[orchideae]

In today's episode of 'Sae, do you (...)': the topic of Ningguang and Yelan, and I thought that I should note my opinion more clearly outside of my rules as it's very important information for my portrayal: I do not ship Ningguang and Yelan romantically.

Honestly, while this is of course my own opinion, I don't find that there's anything to really substantiate a romantic interest between the two. For starters, I don't think that Ning, as interesting of a character as she is with a past that might just be similar in its 'rise' to Yelan's (we're left with very little information on the latter's childhood), ticks the right kind of boxes for her, though to be fair: not many do. Yelan craves a specific sort of thrill in her life, I mean she lives it at the roll of a dice because she is, on some level, bored, and craves the unexpected, the unusual, the 'surprise', and Ningguang's life nor personality seem to play into that. Beyond it, Yelan would need a kinship within this very specific 'loneliness' that I talk about too often and I think that Ning is not one who quite meshes into that in the right way.

Second, despite their long-standing history that even predates their mutual involvement with the Qixing, there seems to be a certain professional distance between the two that I'm quite fond of that is shown in brief event cutscenes, and also Yelan's vision story, that I find inherently intriguing. Perhaps this distance plays more into Yelan's character of not investing too heavily, or rather not too easily, into social dynamics than it does Ning's (I'm not one to weigh in on her character), but it seems evident to me that there's also that semblance of professionalism that creates a line that takes away the possibility of growing closer on an emotional level. And whether that's a mutual decision or not is not up to me to judge, but I think it's one that's made rather clearly from Yelan's side. On top of that, Yelan is Yelan and it's my personal belief that shipping her is rather difficult.

Now I'm also inherently of the opinion (unpopular, I know, I apologize) that dynamics aren't always more interesting when written in romantic settings, and I don't think it's a benefit for all of them to veer into a romantic nature. And in my opinion (and most importantly: in my depiction and understanding of Yelan's character), I think that having Ning and Yelan cross the line from professionalism into something inherently more rooted in romanticism, would be a detriment to their dynamic. Because honestly, I think the fact that Ningguang being one of two people (other being Uncle Tian) to know Yelan best, without ever crossing that line, is too good. I would simply, well, just prefer to keep that not only platonic, but professional, but of course not excluding it of Yelan's quips, and the occasional 'confidant' element.

/rambles in tags because I feel like I have more to say that I shouldn't flood the post with.

#[ psa. ] seeing isn't always believing. and if you can't trust your eyes; you certainly can't trust rumors. #[ also; and this is where you'll learn more about my 'single-ship' self-- i love the concept of ningguang and beidou. ] #[ and i wouldn't want to take away from that dynamic /in my own head/. it's not about what others do/see/view. but about my own head. ] #[ if i did ship it-- it'd counter that dynamic and i don't like that (again: in my own brain). ] #[ i'm an odd rper in that sense; but i almost have difficulty straying from this... single verse concept. ] #[ in my head i tie specific characters to other specific characters after a lot of thought and i don't commit to those thoughts easily. ] #[ but then i construct this entire huge narrative in my head that's almost like its own book. ] #[ and so i can't easily 'copy' that multiple times for multiple ships. does that make sense? ] #[ but /because/ i do that-- i heavily scrutinize dynamics across the board and it's where a lot of my enjoyment as a writer comes from. ] #[ these analyses of specific characters and dynamics. why are they the way that they are? ] #[ it's psychology. i love it. it's not just saying 'i love finding out what makes characters tick' but it's actively really going... ] #[ 'yeah okay i could ship these-- but is there basis for it and /why/ and /in what capacity/ and specifically: /would they decide to/? ] #[ sometimes i tell myself that i'm not made for rp'ing because i'm too analytical meshed in with too much emotion. ] #[ because i get too invested. ] #[ but i just-- i don't know. i wanted to kind of explain why pointing stuff like this out is important to me and my portrayal. ] #[ especially for yelan who has such a... god; it's almost an unhealthy headspace. you can't mesh that with just anyone. ] #[ the person has to /really get it/ and understand it almost on this level that isn't logical for most humans. because it's unusual. ] #[ but it's important that it's understood /by another human being/. ] #[ and i also think some people genuinely don't mesh in /that/ way. some can mesh perfectly platonically in my head and then... ] #[ not at all romantically. but when /my head/ has decided that this is how it is-- i respect when people disagree; i do. ] #[ i will never say that my opinions are the be all end all for other yelans or even yelan's character in specific. ] #[ as much as i like to think i analyze-- /i could be wrong/. ] #[ but all in all; i do respect if people disagree. but there's just certain opinions i have for my own portrayal that i need to note. ] #[ but also-- a little explanation as to why i'm single-ship more often than not. i wish i could budge how my brain works. but alas. ] #[ /sips coffee past midnight. ] #[ it's been a day. it really has been a day; i need to make my own serotonin tomorrow. i miss writing. ]