#0cd. here we r again. stuck back in the messy overlap. but whatever i got proscribed bip0lar medicine. lam1ctal. we'll see

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#aaaand thats a 3rd doctor. a psychiatrist. who listened to me ans thought: mm sounds like bip0lar lol #me: wow its so easy to get diagnosed as bip0lar. thats bc u r exhibiting lots of depression and a limit amount of mood elevation. that's #like. thats what bip0lar is. she was like yea ppl with bip0lar 2 spend like 75% of time being depressed and a lil elevated mood... which #sounds like what u r describing. me: #...yeah. but again its complicated by the 0cd and spectrum issues. but she independently brought up 4dhd. just when i was like no its all #0cd. here we r again. stuck back in the messy overlap. but whatever i got proscribed bip0lar medicine. lam1ctal. we'll see #bc everyone i talk to is like. we need to control the mood 1st. like so u dont die. and im like hm yeah good call lol #she seems super cool tho. like i would love to just talk to her. ugh. she wants to get a handle on the mood and then maybe add a stimulant #bc shes had it happen in thr past where someone comes in with debiltating 0cd and got treated with lam1ctol and a stimulant and the #obsessive rumination stopped. so well see. idk if ill actually qualify as 4dhd enough. well see. fingers crossed #my mood is a lil elevated rn so its all fun. well see if we tip off a cliff bc im getting less sleep and go go going #unrelated #ugh im scared to start the medine tho bc the ssri i got proscribed fucked me up so much. which is also an indicator of bip0lar #god dammit. if this works im gonna have to actually accept the idea of being bip0lar. i mean. it makes sense being on that spectrum #is just sounds insane and i was not expecting it despite my fucking obsession with understanding wtf my deal is #idk. whatever. doesnt matter