#Tried to research a childrens zoo and at the Ueno zoo and couldn't find

[tottymatsuno]

Ik we all agree that my irl annoyance to lovers au is funny but what if he were still sweet even tho he finds me cringe? I contain multitudes and an oxymoron.

What I'm saying is it'd be so so funny if Todomatsu asked me on date to the petting zoo like he did with the cashier in s3e5 and he saw how ridic my animal phobias are.

Todomatsu: *holding my hand* What do you wanna see first today?

Me: Idk, I've never been to a place like this before! 😊😊😊

Todomatsu: You don't get out much, do you? 😒

Me: No, I guess not. *resists urge to traumadump* Anyways what kinda animals do petting zoos have?

Todomatsu: Hmm, well this one doesn't have as many like the more popular zoos but it was harder to get tickets for them. There's just the regular boring animals like goats -

Me: 😰

Todomatsu: You don't like goats?

Me: I'm scared of them...

Todomatsu: Okay then we don't have to see them. They have deer (😖) hmm, maybe not judging by that expression. There's also chickens (😱) no? I think we could pet some bunnies? You like bunnies don't you, you said they're cute? (they bite) What are you planning on doing to the rabbits to make them bite? There's also guinea pigs (they're too big!!) what do you mean they're too big? Wait nvm save that thought. There's some... Uh, sheep too ig? (💖) alright we'll see the sheep.

Me: Sheep are so cute, I love them! I do think bunny rabbits are cute too but they bite, and mice are cute too but scary. As long as you feed them for me everything will turn out just fine!

Todomatsu: You're so weird 💖

Me: *swinging his hand happily* I'm normal, you're the one with five clones and not a single funny bone between the six of ya. 💖

Todomatsu: It's too early in the day to lie so boldly. *reads the map* Alright, we can hang out with the animals until lunch and then we'll eat at a nearby cafe. That sound good? *leads me thru the zoo*

Me: Yeah! *we get closer to the petting area and I become visibly scared* Todomatsu...??? The beasts are walking among the people.

Todomatsu: Oh you're right. The feed is over there so wait here and I'll get some.

Me: *stands perfectly with my eyes shut still outside of the area bc I'm terrified* 😖

Todomatsu: Okay, I got some treats! And look, isn't this bunny the cutest little thing? *holds up bunny*

Me:.................... *delayed reaction* Cheese and crackers!!!!!! It's gonna bite you, put it down!

Todomatsu: It's not gonna bite, let's go inside now. Don't worry, I'll protect you from all the scary animals.

Me: 🥺 ok but if one of those guys get too close you need to destroy this zoo for me.

Todomatsu: I'm not going to do that but okay.

Me: *screams every 0.000009 seconds because I'm scared of the chickens, bunnies, guinea pigs, sheep, goats, and everything there*

Todomatsu: *exhausted by the end of the date* Sorry for inviting you out here 😑. Next time just tell me if you don't like the sound of a date that way we can have fun. 🙄 This was a terrible idea, but at least I know better now. 😞

Me: Oh I had a blast!! 💞 The bunnies were sooo cute, and the sheepie weepies omg ❤️. And that widdol pony, and even the baby goats were so sweet!!! 😍 Ahhh I really had a great time!! 💖 You are so nice, Todomatsu! I'm super happy we came here today! 😘 Let's go watch a movie at home now! 🥰

Todomatsu: You were scared the whole time! You didn't stop running and hiding behind me, what are you talking about?! What's with the history revision???

Me: Sometimes how much we love is what scares us the most.

Todomatsu: You're full of it!

Me: You're a dick, I'll have you know I can love what I fear. I had a turtle named Jimmy I loved, feared and respected.

Todomatsu:

#I had to Google this bc thats irl canon ive never been to one. Also this post is inspired by me seeing a big ass guinapig bc im scared #Tried to research a childrens zoo and at the Ueno zoo and couldn't find #irl me x todomatsu mixer au #This is so funny bc my wife asked me what animals do I love and aren't terrified of and I only could say cats and dogs ik #Todomatsu: I'm never inviting you anywhere again. When are you free next week? #tottyra