#and if arthurs feeling like causing a little chaos because hes a feral bastard sometimes he'll just

[thecatinthepurplepants]

just had the though of John and Arthur having one of them 3 am talks and discussing what it's like to live in a human body and John doesn't quite grasp not being aware of all your various parts and organs all the time and Arthur has to explain that humans CAN be aware of certain things to an extent but thinking too hard about it or suddenly being made aware of it is VERY unpleasant

Cue John making a game of finding quiet moments when Arthur's least expecting it and just

"Hey Arthur?"

"Hm?"

"...Dont think about how your skin feels over your flesh."

Followed by Arthur fucking full body grimacing and yelling at John to "fucking STOP THAT" and John cackling like a baritone bog witch because no it never gets old even if he does it at LEAST once a week

#he does this whether theyre in public or not he doesnt care #plus sometimes theres the added bonus of sometimes someone asks arthur whats wrong #and if arthurs feeling like causing a little chaos because hes a feral bastard sometimes he'll just #'oh sorry i just thought of the fact that our teeth are just exposed bones very unpleasant to think about' #and then john cackles even harder watching this persons face twist like they just bit into a whole lemon #because sometimes you gotta give your eldritch entity that lives in your head a lil enrichment in the form of making others uncomfortable #as a treat #malevolent shitpost #malevolent podcast #malevolent #arthur lester #john doe malevolent #john malevolent