#and then trans women. then butch women. and soon you have a space thats only welcome to whoever terfs deem “not a threat”

[fatcowboys]

i rlly kinda need fat liberation or body positivity or whatever to be so so so So much better about includong masculine folks in their resources and conversations.

ive rarely been femme even before i knew i wasnt a woman so its not like ive really had a bountiful access to fat resources aimed towards femme folks but god damn i have felt my options shrink even smaller the less comfortable i am with femme aimed resources and how out of place my body seems within so many of those spaces and resources. ESPECIALLY ones that can accomodate my trans body, tits (that i don't hate! and don't foresee going anywhere anytime soon!) and all.

i know how few plus sized clothing brands there are (not even getting into affordable + ethically made etc etc) but if the ones that exist its an OVERWHELMINGLY femme aligned majority that i feel miserable wearing without a lot of extra styling and modification work. or the amount of masc clothes in stock at plus size resale stores vs femme clothes. or if i am looking for style inspiration or folks speaking about fat liberation finding fit insp for fat women is easy! but i have a much smaller pool of fat masculine folks (who i treasure dearly!) that ive found and return to their content regularly because its so valuable to me because its often hidden under content that, while important, has limited usefulness for me

i find this extra prevalent in body positivity spaces, where it often feels like resources and information is shared with the assumption that its been shared to other femme folks and women without specifying that is who its usefulness is aimed towards. what triggered this post right now (although its honestly always lurking around the corner, watch out if you have a single conversation with me about fat liberation) was a post about body positivity where someone shared a resource of a website where you can put in your height, weight, other info and see people who might look like you (and make it easier to appreciate their body where you find it difficult to appreciate your own). and i thought thats a cool resource! i dont get to see people who look like me, hardly ever! lets check it out!

unfortunately what wasnt included was that the subtitle for this site is "what real women look like" so while there wasn't any info stating identities of the people shown on the photos, of the few i clicked through they all were femme and while they looked great, i didnt see anyone who i felt looked like me to get what i hoped out of that site. this would have been fine if the person had posted it had stated its target audience up front, but this isnt the first time, and wont be the last time, that i got excited about a resource only to learn it actually has very little that applies to me.

if you are someone who shares content about fat liberation, PLEASE consider how much content and resources you share that can be utilized by your masculine followers as well - and at the very least, please don't state something as universally beneficially if its not. i understand why there is such a focus on this considering the history of beauty standards applied to femme folks (and more). however im unlearning those too and now also dealing with new ones as i transition that are far less talked about and i just ask we give some space for fat men, masculine people, butches and more to also create space to deal with these struggles within fat liberation spaces. especially especially especially for fellow folks larger than small fats because the need only grows.

#okay to rb! #god this got so long lmfao but. im really really tired lmao.