#don't ask me why jhughes was namedropped so much. that's actually none of my business. they just love bringing him up unlike me

[stromer]

how do you want the draft to go??

overwhelming response (two people in total) to my previous post :p so here are my dope takes that i wish the NHL would take seriously regarding the 2023 draft:

i do not take actual draft order into consideration for like any of these... because ch*cago ruined my life and draft order attempted to ruin idgaf war hero jeichel's life SO!!

bedard to the ducks

i think it's pretty obvious this was the spot i wanted bedsy to land. the whole OC boy experience was something i was rooting so hard for. he needed to discover the healing powers of a double double animal style clowning on zegras. like i've said before, his horror filled eyes would only get worse with one trip on the I5.. and i think it would've made him an even better hockey player somehow 🧪

he REALLY needed to be a canuck. common fact. but those freaks fucked around and found out horrifically. at least they played meaningful hockey when it was supposed to be MEANINGLESS. thank you very much to those orcas. you just lost connor bedard cuz anti-tank kuzmenko had bananas to eat. and quinn. that freak

2. leo carlsson to the sharks

in a perfect world, leo carlsson will never know the saw trap under construction that is Ohio. and the fact that he even knows where it is on the map is already too much for me to bear. if my lovely sharks had actually committed to a really good tank... i would’ve bought a jersey. i will use the power of my delusion to ensure this DOES happen actually. that's a guarantee cuz don't i deserve to be happy?? give me another swede MIKE!!! you keep taking ekky away from me, u capital L Loser so give me another one

in another universe i think leo to philly would be fucking bonkers level big brain 🧠 i only say this cuz i think he needs to hangout with joel farabee IMMEDIATELY. i found leo's tiktok and he's on there being so fucking silly goofy lipsyncing to GUNNA??? hooping to Lil baby??? even hit the griddy?? new era of orange and maybe leo should be there

3. adam fantilli to the HABS

this choice was mainly inspired by this comment adam left on cole's instagram and it got me THINKING. known jhughes fan boy adam fantilli has been going to work getting in with the NTDP boys and i think this is a solid choice somehow. can't really elaborate more on this, just a feeling i'm feeling.

again, in a world where jackets didn't commit to the bit of being so completely morbid awful nasty gross, adam going there so he wasn't too far away from his other half luca would've been good with me. the umichification of OHIO.. c'mon 〽️

and of course the reality of the great chances he's a future duck hasn't been lost on me. i think he's going to be a great addition to the canadian heist that will force zegras into more team canada jerseys.

plus he hit a matthews celly once. and i think that means he goes somewhere where it would be eaten up

4. will smith to buffalo

with a name like will smith he's got to go somewhere that i KNOW bitches will serenade him with the fresh prince of bel air theme song (like he assumedly has been all his life) and what better place to do this than the sabres. a team for silly goofy guys is where i think will smith and his NTDP taught silliness could thrive. also the athletic clowned on him for not being able to skate like jhughes despite being the n.1 center in the NTDP this year. whiteboy hockey looks can haunt you apparently .but my son you will go to a place where it doesn't matter because the vibes are too strong. cuz i said so

however, streets are saying he might be coming to the sharks. no surprise considering will is a future boston college student athlete and mike grier starts acting up anytime someone with BOSTON connections is in his sights. like a rabid dog with no self control. so, maybe bordy will be in contact with smith soon via insta DM?? and maybe i wouldn't be mad about it

anyway... all of these boys are haunted regardless of where they get drafted because they got invited to vegas to watch stanley cup final game 2.. and we all know that was a monstrosity so. Permanently scarred pre draft, here's how i would've saved them.

THE END!

#is my sharks bias really obvious??? LMAO srry hahahaha 😐 i'm so miserable help me!!!!!!!!! #i think this all checks out idk someone make me commissioner of NHL STAT #posting this and moving on with my silly stupid life (i will complain until june 28th and even after that when none of this happens) #don't ask me why jhughes was namedropped so much. that's actually none of my business. they just love bringing him up unlike me #don't care about any one else. i also put too much thought into these 4 so no more brainpower to expend in this post