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#humans stumble ass-backwards into one another's orbits; we are at the mercy of our strange gravities
tbposting · 8 months
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As I get older I realize more and more how incredibly helpful it was for me to get exposed to queer erotica when I was young. Had some friends who were furries and through them I got to see various kinds of queer erotica, which sexualizes and loves the human body in such profoundly different ways than cishet porn and erotica does.
It was helpful because it helped chip away at the idea of normativity, the idea that there is one central ideal towards which all things must strive.
Not in a "queer porn made me enlightened!!!" kind of sense, but in the sense that once the time came that I was ready to start confronting my internalized self-hate and body shame and insecurities, I had some ammo to work with. I wasn't going up against it alone - I could point to this art - gay male art, lesbian art, furry art, art from the transgender perspective, all of it - and know that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
I still had to do some work to accept it, and internalize it, but I could know because I had evidence that, yes, there are people who desire bodies like mine, and who love those bodies earnestly and viscerally.
And regardless of whether I am attracted to those people in turn, whether I want to date them or sleep with them, it means that that insidious little voice which is drilled into the back of our heads telling us that our bodies do not meet the standard of quality that qualifies us for love is, quite simply, wrong. Beauty ideals are not a universal value, and they arise from no necessary truth or rational principle, they are a series of deliberate choices made by cultures, influenced by the culture's values.
And when that culture is struggling with a history of white supremacy, with a history of systemic sexism and homophobia, when that culture is dictated in large part by the whims and interests of billion dollar corporations intent on selling Products & Services™, the choice of beauty ideal is neither neutral or healthy, and you can unmake that choice for yourself, and find something better.
Anyway, I guess my point is that porn is good for you actually, especially the gay stuff. Replace all the Marvel movies you watch with filthy Ao3 fiction and furry smut.
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