#in my specific playthrough anyways Emrys is noooot interested in being someone's nurse

[jahiera]

one of the things that hits really nicely for me with Astarion's romance is that he never really encourages or wants you to be some kind of "protector." there are several instances where you can offer him that; protection, swear to him you'll kill cazador, or after his personal quest--I don't have the screencaps on hand, but you can directly say to him that he'll never have to need something like the ritual, because you'll protect him, and HE says back something along the lines of "It would be nice to not need you as my grand protector.... but I appreciate the thought." -- there's tinges here early in act 1 maybe of distrust of faulty promises yes, and considering Tav naive / not comprehending the power of cazador and therefore unhelpful, but even as you proceed, he's never interested in trading a lack of protection for a dependency on a protector.

in fact, the only time he's like "I'm doing it for US... to keep US safe <3" is when he's trying to manipulate/convince Tav into letting him do the ritual. "You want whats best for me right <3333" is the thing he actively uses to try and sway you over to his side, because he knows that's an emotional string to pull on.

there's an insistence of preferring equality in the subtext there; that protection or a skewed imbalance is not what Astarion wants, at his core. he doesn't want a nurse, or to be pitied, or be beholden to anyone. to try and pity him invites his irritation, even outrage. trying to swear to protect him at best gets a fond "I appreciate the Thought" and at worst a "don't be a fucking idiot." it would be veeeeery easy for the narrative to slip into something generic about being able to fix him, but it insists on someone to depend on as equals. give and take in true partnership. and in the post-ritual ending you can really feel the lack of equality there too--only now, he's in the position of both """"protector"""", and more so than that, obsessive beholder of Tav, and he exercises it in overt fashion; of course he'll protect you, your future, your life, is his after all. (and there's a LOT about that that's very interesting to me, and equally as complex & intricate as the no-ritual route in which two people meet on equal footing.) the game never shames this approach of wanting to protect him either, it acknowledges the good intent, and simply shows in Astarion's reactions that there's more here to it than that.

#bg3 meta #bg3 spoilers #like one thing I wanted to avoid throughout my playthrough was winding up in a position where #Tav/Emrys is babying him or putting him down as someone who needed to be Protected and Defended #in my specific playthrough anyways Emrys is noooot interested in being someone's nurse #since it's the kind of trope that can be easily fallen into; but the game doesn't really allow it #Astarion doesn't really allow it #he's just Not interested in that. he doesn't think you can protect him and even at the very end #when you PROVE you can #he isn't interested in that dynamic. he's interested in a partnership of equals #vs the ritual ending where there's no equality; there's possession and desire in its place #both are so interesting & so quick to subvert the expectations of the narrative #like they knew it would be possible to push the I'll Protect You With My Life button and it's never the thing #he's most receptive to #even at the beginning. 'i'll watch your back if you watch mine' hits better for him than promising his safety #because you can't... promise that. not really. #anyways. babygirl. #astarion