#now he's getting the birds and the bees and the chains and whips that bind them talk from some scrungly magician

[nerdpoe]

There's a level of Hell that Constantine loves and hates in equal measure.

The Level of Lust and Debauchery.

He loves it for what it is, but he also really, really hates it. The beings in it are unhinged at best, completely insane at worst. Stronger than Demons, but weaker than Gods-it's always more stressful than fun dealing with them.

So needing to summon the King of that level is...well. John can already feel the exhaustion.

But instead of exhaustion, he feel rage. Disgust.

The King that shimmers into existence is a fucking child.

And John honestly loses some time after that.

He comes back from ranting with the tiny King forcefully yanking him to a stop.

"Wait, you thought the Infinite Realms were what?"

Turns out, that wasn't the Level of Lust and Debauchery at all. Turns out, the Infinite Realms has a Red Light District.

Turns out, that is a very, very small part of the Infinite Realms, and this tiny child King had no idea it was there, and now he has to explain what a Red Light District is to an increasingly mortified Royal Teenager.

All around, it's not a fun time for anyone present.

#dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #dc x dp #story prompt #phanfic #john made some assumptions and now he and danny have to suffer for them #danny didn't mean “what's a red light district” he means “what the fuck would a red light district in the ghost zone even look like” #now he's getting the birds and the bees and the chains and whips that bind them talk from some scrungly magician #and he's too mortified to tell the man he already knows #afterwards danny and john pretend like they never met #pretend like the next summoning is the first one #but the other Leaguers who were present for the first know #even though they really didn't want to #that John is into some FREAKY SHIT #and think that the King of the Infinite Realms is an innocent babey