#so yeah. if you read this i’m sorry for being cringefail and bad at everything~~ am i still allowed to pollute your dash~? <3

[deus-ex-mona]

sometimes, i just wanna evaporate… _(:3 」∠)_

#5 am depression rant incoming… sorry #tfw you’re sooooooooooo bad at everything you do it’s not even funny anymore _(:3 」∠)_ #like. i’m so bad at my job that i can work ot for 4 and a half hours till 3.30am and *still* not be done with my assigned task #who would’ve guessed that latent cringefail + a general inability to focus + a horrible repetitive task would be a recipe for failure— #so yeah. i’m terrible at my job. especially when i’m at this certain workstation. i wonder how i even still have a job… #and if i at least had something else to be decent at… that’d be a different story #but no. i suck at my hobbies too. let’s face it; my tls are horrible. literally anyone else can do a better and more consistent job #and this other hobby i once had? i was decent at it for a bit then i had to take a break bc of work and stuff… #…and yeah. i sucked at it biiiiiiiig time when i returned. even the most junior of my juniors were better than me and i. #and ofc i suck balls at the arts too. (shoutout to the time i was rejected from the drama club for being too depressed) #like i once duetted with a then-friend for a music test of sorts. normal stuff right? #nope. we sang so horribly that our teacher stopped us in the middle of the second verse. at least our classmates didn’t laugh at us lol #ughhhhhhhhh. and that’s not even mentioning my terribly terrible social and communication skills. why am i like this #sorry if you read this. i’m just.. gonna hope that today will be a better day than… well. today… #inedible blubbering