#the lyrics are basically exposition with the choreography and performances telling the story

[ancaporado]

Ok I need to go on a rant about show tunes. They're objectively bad. Don't worry, I've heard a lot of them, I even played in the pit for my high school theater and I still hate show tunes. 1.The lyrics are cringey, basically just dialogue or literal exposition of the story. I do like concept albums, in fact I think the idea of using music to tell a story is great, but making your characters constantly RHYME to speak to one another is absolutely insane as it takes away the characters ability to speak in their own voice. The linear progression of story telling also means that the lyrics rarely repeat, often as a song goes on a chorus allows for the listener to reinterpret the previous verses and anticipate new ones, we rarely get such a break in show tunes. this almost means that we get explicit character names, places, and events in our lyrics which lacking context completely jar a listener. 2.Singing is bad. Essentially it's modern opera, so I get that it started with lots of projection and vibrato, but let's be real you no longer have to do that with lapel microphones. We can have dynamic volume and annunciation. These people have grown up their whole lives singing with piano accompaniment and it shows in the tin-like nasal annunciation they sing. Even the best broadway singer would instantly butcher any other genre as they barely slide notes or usually can't hold notes WITHOUT vibrato, nor do they get through distorted vocals without simply getting raspy. 3.Instrumentation. To be fair, musicals have been getting a little better about incorporating stuff besides classic accompaniment but basically whenever they do they attempt it as a genre piece, and end up completely cliche as the genre is concern. Outside of the narcissisms of the writers or actors, the MUSIC is never the focus of the song. 4. No genre or originality. I would say Grease and Rocky Horror are perfect examples of this in that basically they are simply 4 chord progression covers of a well established genres that are extremely easy to churn out. If you know a little music theory you could write a "blues" or "rock" or "jazz" musical in an afternoon. Even when it's done no song from a musical can stand on it's own against MUSIC written for the purpose of just being listened too. If you were to have a blind listening test for anyone trained in any amount of music they could pick out a "musical" song nearly 99% of the time. Most "Musical" music is to normal music what Christian Rock is to rock, the music is entirely secondary to an agenda.

5.Arrangement. Very little thought is usually put into the arrangement of the of songs, as nothing besides the voice of the actors can really take up much time in the melody so why bother. Interesting sounds, instruments, or melodic and harmonic ideas are just a distraction to the performance. Outside of backing there's little required of most musicians to preform these pieces, and half the time it sounds like a church band or high school choir for this reason. Improvisation, instrumental solos, or a breakdown are either rare or completely unimaginative in structure. 6. Chord progressions are all basic to the point that the "halfway through a song key step as a way to mix it up a little bit because we got more exposition in the lyrics as we go from point a to b as we do a 4 chord progression that is getting boring" is a thing in pretty much every musical. So anyways in conclusion, musicals suck, are completely stagnant as a "genre". They are written by and for a strange kind of narcissistic person who needs to constantly hear a very loud voice telling them a story with comforting non-dangerous music that's really only there to help set a little bit of mood for whatever tacky costume and choreography is supposed to be happening on stage. If you listen to show tunes for fun outside of actually watching a stage production you probably should be institutionalized. If, even worse, you make other people listen to them on a PA system while at a retail or work situation you should be euthanized. Don't send me your favorite "this is musical music but it's good because it avoids the reasons you said above" as it still sucks for another reason I didn't remember while typing this.