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#they don't speak english well so this is turning into some weird spanish english battle of who knows enough words to communicate
cuntwrap--supreme · 2 years
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Nothing weirder than waking up to your dogs barking, going to investigate, and finding there are three men on your roof cutting the thing apart. Hi. Hello? Who are you?
#they don't speak english well so this is turning into some weird spanish english battle of who knows enough words to communicate#something about the boss told them to come here#asked if the boss was around#they said no he's at another job#tried asking if the landlord sent them. didn't have the words for that. confusion.#whatever his reply was was also lost in translation. more confusion.#something about working. that's all i got. so I'm leaving these dudes alone now. said let me know if they need anything in half-spanish.#dude said will do in half-english#no idea what's going on. i was pretty sure the plumbing here needed fixed not the roof?#but they have a solid 10x12 chunk carved out from what it seems on the ground. so i guess something big is fucked up up there?#anticipating the landlord trying to give us the bill like he does for everything#I'm just hoping these guys are actual roofers because most of the people he has do maintenance are just someone's dad with no experience#had a guy fix an outlet many years ago who was clearly just a guy he found who said he knows electrical shit#but who was really just some bubba ass hillbilly who knows a guy who knows a guy who's an electrician#tried to charge us $200 for that#basement started flooding at one point because the plumbing here is 60 years old. that was shoddily done too. tried charging us $1500#he had the roof replaced about 6 years ago now and tried billing us $15000 for that.#he also tried charging us for my mom repainting this place. he okd it beforehand because the paint looked like shit. tried charging $300#even though my mom bought the paint and spent her free time painting this shithole? ok.#each time he's done this he threatens eviction if we don't pay him.#so we threaten to take him to court for violating tenant's rights laws. which he does constantly.#and then he'll shut up and eat the bill himself. as he should.#this man is 85 years old with double eye cancer. like. just die already bro.#his sons are much nicer than he is but he won't give them control of his properties yet...#the one who will inherit this house said he'll sell it to my mom for dirt cheap once he gets control of it because we've been here so long#but that was 10 years ago. i was still a minor.#we've been here going on 13 years and this guy has had cancer that whole time. and somehow not croaked.#note: i don't wish cancer death upon normal people. just landlords and politicians and other scum.
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dappledpetals-blog · 7 years
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Langst prompt ☆The team gets hit by Haggars spell which makes them forget how to speak anything but first language (like Galras are smart and know many) so everyone except maybe Hunk and Lance don't know. Hunk stays quiet and withdrawn but Lance is trying to tell them. Nobody knows Spanish or Hawaiian(?) So they get angry thinking lance is just messing around
Thanks for asking, dear anon! I had some fun with this idea (lol I just realized it’s like 10 pages XD) And I hope you like it! I changed a few things, like making the team a bit angry with Hunk as well (since it makes no sense to me why they would only be angry at Lance), but other than that it’s pretty much the same. This happens after Shiro’s gone (and I didn’t make it clear who the Black paladin is so you can decide XD) I tried to make it nice but I’m not quite satisfied, but I hope you are! 
It should have been an ordinary mission.
It was simple really, when you thought about it. Just get in, get the information Pidge needed, and get out. They didn’t expect for Haggar to appear, druids behind her, white hair crackling with what could only be described as ethereal magic as she snarled at the paladins. They didn’t expect to have a confrontation with her so soon.
But in the end, it seems like everyone made it out okay. Haggar had managed to blast them with some sort of spell, the druids cackling behind her as her eyes glowed in the darkness of her hood, but there seemed to be no lasting effects.
Well, none that Coran could find.
“Step out of the pod, please.” Coran asked, pulling up the finished log of data with one hand, the other smoothly pressing the ejection for the pod. Stumbling out, Lance took a moment to glance tiredly at the orange-haired Altean before resuming his earlier position by Hunk.
Tugging at his mustache, Coran turned to face the team, the holo-screen flickering in front of him. The blue light somehow made his eyes brighter as they turned up to gaze at the team, who all stood (rather nervously) a few feet from him. Pidge tapped their foot impatiently, Keith’s gaze flickering from his crossed arms to the floor. Lance and Hunk were both tired and silent, as during the mission they had to go the extra mile to form Voltron.
“Well?” Keith asked impatiently, grey-violet eyes flickering to Coran’s. The gorgeous man stroked his mustache a bit, finally turning the screen off and coughed into his hand before proceeding.
“Well, there seems to be no ill effects from the spell that the pod can detect,” He said cheerily. The team seemed to exhale in unison, the four paladin’s shoulders relaxing as the stress began to ebb. Of course, it didn’t fade entirely, but that is an unimportant detail.
“That’s good.” Pidge stated, pushing their glasses up their nose. It was slightly annoying at times, as the glasses were once Matt’s and weren’t made for their face, but the rest of the team secretly thought that they liked the way it made them give off a rather smart, anime-like effect.
“Are there any ill effects, Coran?” Allura asked, stepping into the med bay. Her hair was tied up in a loose bun, dark bags under her eyes and her ears drooping. It was no secret that the loss of Shiro had hit her one of the hardest, second only to Keith himself. Ever since the epic battle with Zarkon, Allura had made wormhole after wormhole, often with little rest. Even the strongest Altean couldn’t have gone on as long as she had.
“No Princess. The pods can’t pick up anything.” Coran supplied cheerfully, stroking his mustache before beginning to walk out of the room.
“Wonderful!” She clapped, somehow still managing to look graceful and cheerful in their situation. “Paladins, return to your rooms for a long rest. We will adjoin tomorrow to discuss the plans.”
“Bueno.” (Good.) Lance said. Hunk blinked at him confusedly as they slipped out, and he scrunched his nose. He hadn’t meant to slip into Spanish. What had happened?Oh well. He shrugged it off, chalking it up to exhaustion from the mission. It wasn’t anything to worry about.
Right?
______Turns out, it was something to worry about.
BANG! BANG! BANG!
Lance shot up quickly, hair mussed, face mask smeared and headphones askew on his head. Blinking blearily up at the ceiling of his room, the Cuban boy threw his headphones down on the bed before stalking up to the door. Oh, he was going to chew out Keith so hard-
But it wasn’t Keith.
The door standing open, the large frame of Hunk stared back at him. Their gazes met, Hunk’s terrified brown eyes meeting Lance’s confused blue ones. Hunk was sweating, his mouth open slightly as he panted. He must have run all the way to his room.
“Hunk?” Lance asked confusedly, mentally scrunching his nose up at the way he said it. Like he was pronouncing it differently.
“E mafai ona e malamalama ia te aʻu?” (Can you understand me?) Hunk asked quickly, his hands clutched in front of him nervously.
He furrowed his brows, gaze flickering up at Hunk. Why was Hunk not speaking English? Was this a troll?
“Esto es una broma ¿verdad?” (This is a joke, right?) He asked, eyebrow raised. Suddenly, his eyes widened. Putting a hand to his mouth (maybe he smeared his face mask a little in the process), Lance looked fearfully up at his friend.
“¿Que esta pasando? ¿Por qué hablo español?” (What’s going on? Why am I speaking Spanish?) He asked again, gasping when he realized he said it in Spanish. Hunk was looking at him fearfully, eyes confused and slightly glossy. Lance bit his lip, looking down both sides of the hallway. Seeing no one there, he quickly pulled Hunk inside.
Shutting the door behind him, Lance motioned for Hunk to sit down by his bed. He began to pace, muttering to himself in Spanish. Hunk looked at him confusedly, and Oh mierda Hunk no sabe español.
Taking a deep breath, he turned to face the shorter boy. The yellow paladin was clutching his headphones, brows furrowed in confusion as they stared at each other.
Lance mentally sighed. Okay, so they couldn’t understand each other. That’s fine. He can improvise.
What followed was possibly the worst (but most entertaining) montage of the two trying to act out their questions and answers, followed by the other looking on confusedly. The eventual use of some rudimentary translator they managed to snag from the Space mall (it was shit and didn’t work at all) followed that. Eventually, the two stood in Lance’s room awkwardly, both seemingly no closer to understanding why it was happening.
So we can think in English to ourselves, but when we try to talk it’s like everything switches to our native languages… Lance furrowed his brow, tapping his cheek. But what could have the power to do that?
Suddenly, the two looked up at each other. Something had clicked. They both knew what had happened.
“Haggar.” They said in unison, Hunk’s eyes wide and Lance’s lip bleeding slightly from him chewing on it.
Taking a deep breath, Lance pointed to the door. Miming walking out, he basically tried to convey that they should tell the others.
Hunk shrugged. Lance sighed.
Walking to the nearest wall, Lance took some of his face cream and began to draw. He drew a weird shape to represent Hunk and him, drawing them surrounded by other strange shapes. Finishing it off with a crude speech bubble (because there was only so much he could do with face cream on a wall), he turned back to his friend. The yellow paladin’s face was scrunched up, but he eventually flashed the thumbs-up to indicate that he understood.
Motioning to the door, the two paladins stumbled out and began their trek to the bridge.
______“You’re early.” Was what the two were greeted to when they got to the bridge. Allura stood in the center, her hair loose, multi-colored eyes piercing Lance’s. Lance flashed her a smirk and some finger guns, before Hunk immediately nudged his shoulder and (not so subtly) reminded him of their mission.
Clearing his throat, Lance tried to begin.
“Princesa, hay algo malo con nosotros. No podemos hablar inglés y pensamos que es culpa de Haggar pero no lo sabemos. ¿Puedes ayudarnos?” Lance asked, stumbling slightly over the words. Wringing his hands behind him, Hunk nodded slightly to try and agree with what he was saying. (Princess, there’s something wrong with us. We cannot speak English and we think it’s Haggar’s fault but we do not know. Can you help us?)
Allura blinked confusedly.
“What was that, Lance?”Sighing, Lance repeated again.
“Princesa, hay algo malo con nosotros. No podemos hablar inglés y pensamos que es culpa de Haggar pero no lo sabemos. ¿Puedes ayudarnos?”
“Lance, if you’re trying to joke, now is not the time. We have much more important matters to attend to than you trying to make a joke. Now please speak normally.” Allura explained calmly, though her eyes were narrowed slightly.
“Ae le mafai ona tatou tautala faaPeretania!” Hunk cried, placing a hand on Lance’s shoulder. Lance nodded quickly (he could understand a little of what Hunk was saying, being his best friend since diapers and all). (but we cannot speak English!)
“Hunk, not you too!” Allura huffed, her eyes narrowed dangerously and her arms crossed.
“Stop it now! I’m not going to deal with your joking! Please speak normally now, thank you!”
It was at this moment the rest of the team walked in. Pidge looked confusedly between the three, noticing Hunk and Lance looking agitated and Allura looking as though she wasn’t going to take anyone’s quiznack any longer.
“What’s going on here?” Keith asked the obvious question, eyes narrowed and arms crossed.
Pointing a finger at Allura, Lance began speaking in rapid Spanish. Hunk nodded every once in a while, wringing his hands and eyes flickering through the room. They had to make Keith believe them.
At the end, everyone was still confused.
“Speak English, please.” Keith asked.
“¡Pero no podemos! Eso es lo que estoy tratando de decirte!” Lance groaned, putting a hand to his head. Why did he and Hunk have to be the only ones on this ship who’s native language wasn’t English!? (But we cannot! That’s what I’m trying to tell you!)
Allura groaned.
“This joke has gone on far enough! Cease or you will be in trouble!”Lance stood flabbergastered. Why couldn’t they understand?Groaning, Hunk buried his face into his hands.
Huffing, Allura turned back to her original position.
“Now that that’s over with, I have a few ideas on where Shiro could be…”
____
The next few days were horrible. The spell didn’t seem to be wearing off and every time either paladin tried to speak, everyone around them grew progressively angrier. Hunk was luckier since he was an actual cinnamon roll, but Lance got the worst of it. People snapped whenever he tried to speak. Keith literally left the room when he walked in, and he sure wasn’t getting any favors from Allura.
What could they do?Well, as the two paladins were about to find out, the answer wasn’t as complicated as they seem…
“Entonces, ¿alguien aprendió mágicamente cómo hablar español durante la noche?” (So, did anyone magically learn how to speak Spanish during the night?) Lance asked tiredly, running a hand through his hair as he gazed at the team. Keith just rolled his eyes, Allura pointedly turned away, and Coran just sighed in his Coran-ish way before returning to his duty.
Pidge, however, suddenly slammed their computer down.
“Repeat that, Lance.” They asked, eyes bigger than normal.
“Um, Entonces, ¿alguien aprendió mágicamente cómo hablar español durante la noche?” Lance repeated, raising an eyebrow.
“Holy shit.” Pidge supplied, their hand pointing at Lance. Everyone in the room looked at the 15 year old, who was putting a hand to their mouth.
“Did you say you hoped that someone could speak Spanish during the night?” Pidge asked quickly, already opening their laptop and typing. Lance mimed the universal symbol for more or less.
Slamming their hand on the keyboard, Pidge adjusted their glasses and turned to the room.
“Guys, I think Lance and Hunk are trying to tell us something.”
“Like, they’ve taken this joke too far and they need to stop it now before I punch Lance’s teeth in?” Keith supplied helpfully.
“No, not that- wait why would you say that? No!”
Pidge turned their computer away from them, standing up quickly.
“I’m fluent in French, okay?”
Everyone blinked.
“..Okay?…So?” Keith asked.
“So, French and Spanish (which is what Lance is speaking) are similar languages. Therefore, I was able to (kind of) guess what he was saying. And don’t you remember my loud gasp of realization?”Keith raised an eyebrow.
“What are you saying then?”
Pidge scowled. “What I’m saying, Keith, is that Lance might not be making a joke!”
Lance immediately cheered, pointing excitedly at Pidge before wiping away his (fake) tears, grabbing Hunk’s arm and waving it around. The author may or may not have started playing dramatic, happy music in the background.
“What?” Allura asked, whipping around to face Lance. The Cuban boy immediately sobered, shoving his hands in his pockets and looking back at Pidge.
“Am I right, Lance?” Pidge asked.
Lance nodded.
“Hunk.” He pointed to Hunk.
“Hunk too?”
Lance nodded gravely. Pidge adjusted their glasses, putting their computer back.
“So, why can’t you speak English?”
Lance furrowed his brow, then mimed Haggar using her witchy magic. Pidge raised an eyebrow.
“Haggar.” Lance clarified.
The green paladin then nodded in acceptance of his theory.
“That would make sense.”“Why?” Oh Keith, always the oblivious one.
“Because whatever that Altean witch did, she had to have done it to all of us.”
Adjusting their glasses again, Pidge stood up and began to pace.
“Haggar’s spell hit all of us, right? So then it had to have affected all of us. But somehow, it’s only affecting Lance and Hunk.”
“But if it’s only affecting them, why isn’t it affecting us? What’s so different about Keith and I than Lance and Hunk?”“Well…” Pidge trailed off, whirling around to face Keith. “It’s because you and I speak English! Lance is Cuban and Hunk is…” They turned to face Hunk. “Samoan, right?” “Loe.” Hunk nodded in agreement.
“Exactly. They grew up speaking Spanish and Samoan, but we didn’t. So, whatever Haggar did must have been to confuse us, but it had to be simple, since she’s weak, right?”
“So…” They finished, settling back down on the couch. “Obviously it prevents Hunk and Lance from speaking English, and forces them to say only their native languages. A simple, effective way to divide us and make sure we can’t fight as a team.”
Allura put up a hand, standing up and fixing Pidge with a stare.
“What is ‘French’, ‘Spanish’, and ‘Samoan’?” She asked Pidge. (And while no paladin has confirmed, she pronounced all of them wrong.)
“They’re languages people on Earth speak.” Keith interjected, gaze fixed on Lance’s. His brow was furrowed and he was biting his lip, his posture more tense than before.
“Don’t you all speak the same language?” Coran asked confusedly, pulling up his holo-screen.
“No.” Pidge answered, turning their computer on again. “People on Earth have multiple languages, depending on where you live. You can also learn those other languages if you want, like how I learned French.”
“But we didn’t pick up anything on the scanners.” Coran supplied helpfully, drawing the team back to their earlier subject.
“Because language isn’t something that will show up on medical scanners. There’s nothing physically wrong with them, just the fact that they can’t speak English.”Keith nodded, mouth pressed into a thin line. He looked more like Shiro than he ever had before.
“So how long do you think they’ll be like this?”
Coran twirled his mustache.
“I’m sure it will wear off within a few more vargas. Altean magic cannot last forever.”
Allura nodded dumbly. Then she sighed, turning over to the two other paladins. Her hair was still tied in her loose bun, pieces of it falling out around her face. The bags under her eyes had only darkened, and for a second Lance couldn’t see the strong, determined alien princess she tried to be. Instead, he was staring at a teenager, a girl who had lost far too much and didn’t know how to deal with it. He stared at a teenager who had way too much responsibility thrown on their shoulders, a teenager who was bound to save the entire universe.
He was staring at himself.
“Lance..”
Allura sighed, brushing her dress.
“I am sorry for jumping to conclusions. I did not know that your planet had so many different languages. I thought you were playing a joke on us. But now I see that you were only trying to help.” She took Hunk and Lance’s hands, looking at both of them sorrowfully. “Words cannot express how guilty I feel for not listening to you, not trying to understand what you were saying and doing.”She brushed a piece of hair out of her eyes.
“Can you ever forgive me?”And there was Allura, always the diplomat, even between friends. Who could say no to that speech?Shrugging with a smile, Lance hugged her gently, careful to not try and overstep his boundaries. Hey, he was a flirt, but he wasn’t an asshole. That was Keith’s thing.
(Keith maybe shivered from his corner when that thought crossed Lance’s mind.)
“I’m sorry to you too, Hunk.” Allura clarified, giving Hunk a hug as well. Hunk smiled gently and pat her back, the universal sign of forgiveness.
“I’m sorry too.” Pidge said, suddenly appearing next to Hunk. They looked up at Hunk, shoulders slumped slightly as they wrapped their short arms around the taller paladin.
“I should have paid more attention.”
Everyone looked expectantly at Keith, who was still in the corner. He crossed his arms, looking incredibly uncomfortable with the attention on him.
“I’m sorry too..” He mumbled, coming over.
Well, that’s still one of the most sincere apologies they had ever heard from Keith.
But it’s okay. They’d fix it. They’d fix everything. They’d save the universe from Zarkon, they’d find Shiro, and then they’d go home.
Everything was going to be okay.
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