1-800-luvmail

[1-800-luvmail]

ok so i accidentally posted it on my OTHER side acc but. im clearing drafts. im not dead just apparently busy asf.

had a funny idea of having a long distance relationship w/ johnathan ohnn and remaining in touch even after the whole collider incident but being completely left in the dark abt the whole situation.

at some point in your relationship, he seems to go radio silent— which does in fact make you panic— but then he's back!!! and everything is normal again between the two of you! well,,, kind of?

weirdly, he prefers calls and texts over facetime now. and yes, it is kinda odd that he never talks about his job at alchemax anymore. nor does he reply as quickly to your calls or texts,,, but you don't mind! of course, he hasn't been exactly told you what happened but he swears he will. eventually. at some point.

you hear on the news about a new villain causing chaos and shit around where he lives so you— having no clue— tell him to stay extra safe!

you also ask him abt wtf is going on there becuz??? hello? does shit like that just happen in new york?

yeah so he doesn't tell you. but he can't hide it forever.

especially because he's not the only one with secrets! you've got the plane ticket already, excited to surprise him with a visit.

ft. crappy edit of the meme becuz i cant stop giggling 2 myself. itz not even funny im jus amused easily (*´ｰ｀)ゞ

#prev tags

[1-800-luvmail]

everytime i see tags like these i remember why i get brave and post my writing

#valentine's rambles #becuz bro same #ily non silent rbs <3

[1-800-luvmail]

moodboard abt my feelings towards This Man ft that one @/catcrumb drawing i cant get out of my head. need 2 slaughter him w/ my bare hands i think <3 (´ ᵕ ｀;)ゞ

#valentine's rambles #cod mw2 #cod mwii #phillip graves #i hate this man I HATE HIM I HATE HIM #but also hes my wife <3 #a little insane here im ngl

[1-800-luvmail]

[ read part one w/ price here ! ]

reader who would rather skydive without a parachute than have their self sufficiency questioned vs cod men [ 2 / ? ]

könig assumed that when you invited him to bake with you, it was going to be a cute little activity for the two of you to do. a simple afternoon in your kitchen, making some baked goods to enjoy later.

he could not be more fucking wrong. you bake up a storm, leaving trails of flour, baking soda, sugar and whatever other substances you've used in your wake. you also seem to be eyeballing every single measurement. it's chaos. he's never seen a more disorganized process of making red velvet cupcakes.

the worst part is, könig can't seem to understand why he's even there.

"hey can you pass me th— nevermind, i got it." you say, standing on the tips of your toes to reach a bag of chocolate chips which was just a little too high. he's just a whole 6'10 ft of useless, standing in your kitchen, and getting in the way.

so instead of waiting for instructions, he choses to make himself helpful by attempting to clean as you bake. it works smoothly for the most part. he wipes up any milk you've spilt on the counter, places a batter covered spoon in the sink to be washed later (not before taking a little taste of course... and mess be damned, you're good at baking even if the sample he got was raw), and moves the bowls you don't quite need yet out of the way.

everything is going fine. you're talking to him like this is the most calming activity on earth and he's replying with little hums of acknowledgement and nods as he swiftly tries to get a little more batter from the whisk you've just stopped using.

"hey— no. you're gonna get sick. there's raw egg in there." you chide, just as he's about to sneak a lick. he wonders how you even noticed, considering you seem to be using 110% of your concentration on filling up the cupcake liners with just enough batter for each cupcake to be roughly the same size, which happens to be the only semblance of consistency you've had this entire baking session.

"i'm not going to die because of a little batter." he counters, amused by your concern. he can't help but chuckle.

you snort, rolling your eyes. "famous last words of an impatient man."

eventually, your baking frenzy subsides. the red velvet cupcakes are cooled after being pulled fresh out of the oven, you've made an insanely good homemade cream cheese icing to go on top (which you begrudgingly allow him one taste of. one.), and it's time to decorate. you've piped on most of the icing already, but the unsatisfied stare you give your baked goods allows him to piece together it isn't over yet.

"i think these need sprinkles." you murmur after a moment. your eyes glance around and eventually land on possibly the highest shelf in the kitchen. where the sprinkles just so happen to be. he tries to supress laughter when he sees the disbelief on your face. "motherfu—"

"i will get it." könig interrupts, stepping towards the shelf. you step in front of him, blocking him from getting there, hauling a chair with you.

"nope. won't need to. 'm innovative." he watches you set up the chair and get ready to climb up— only to gently grab your forearm and tug you back.

"famous last words of a stupid person." he scoffs, echoing your words from earlier.

you shoot him an exasperated look as you wriggle out of his grasp.

"c'mon, i do this like, what— all the time? hasn't killed me yet." you say, pointing at the shelf. "it's not that high. i'll just climb up to reach it."

"or you could swallow your pride and allow me to get it."

"and what fun would that be?"

he sighs at your response, rubbing the bridge of his nose as he mutters something to himself. probably in german. not like you could hear. you were too busy staring up at the shelf and getting the chair set up.

on one hand, könig wants to help to prevent you from potentially falling and eating shit, but on the other, he knows you well enough to understand there's no stopping you. so instead, he settles for a compromise.

könig moves the chair out of the way.

"i said, i'm getting it by myself. i kinda need the chair for that." you huff, glancing back at him, only to watch as he lowers himself, arms wrapping around your legs. "hey wh—"

before you can process, you're hoisted up into the air with a startling ease.

"alright," he isn't even trying to hide his smirk as he lifts you up, high enough to reach the shelf, "you can get it."

#val's 💭 #cod mw2 #cod mwii #cod warzone #call of duty #könig #könig x reader #he'll literally b ur personal ladder idk what to say #he's strong. and tall. might as well make the most out of it #i've actually had severe könig brainrot and honestly as someone who dgaf abt this man usually itz a welcome change #hes such a kyutie :33

[1-800-luvmail]

taking reqz on @l0vem41l !!! my main blog ^_^

#requests open #atsv #across the spiderverse #fnaf sb #fnaf security breach #cod #cod mw2

[1-800-luvmail]

[ read part two w/ könig here ! ]

reader who would rather eat cardboard than have their self sufficiency questioned vs cod men [ 1 / ? ]

price— who is fighting the urge to just take the jar and help you the minute he sees you struggle with the tight lid— tries to reason with you as you insist you've almost got it.

"sweetheart," he sighs, watching with his arms crossed as you continue your stubborn attempt, "why don't you let me have a go, hm?"

"it's basically open— this stupid lid just won't—" you grumble, more to yourself than to him. he's unsure which is more stubborn: the lid of the jar or you.

eventually, you do get it open.

"see! hah! i told you—" you grin, triumphantly holding the jar up for him to see.

"that you did," price can't help but be slightly amused, "many times."

"and i was right."

strangely, you never struggle with a jar like that again. not like you think much about it, just happy about your little victories. and now, you offer to open everything for him. price lets you.

he's never telling you that he's made a habit of loosening the lids before you can get to them, because, god that smile of yours as you succeed in "helping" him is just too adorable.

#val's 💭 #johnathan price #john price #captain price #cod mwii #cod mw2 #call of duty #john price x reader #sooo self indulgent like. target audience is me. #raise ur hand if you support in ur life but would rather die instead of ask for it!!!! #🙋 #like ok i actually am self sufficient i just feel the need to prove it way too much #anyways

[1-800-luvmail]

had a funny idea of having a long distance relationship w/ johnathan ohnn and remaining in touch even after the whole collider incident but being completely left in the dark abt the whole situation.

at some point in your relationship, he seems to go radio silent— which does in fact make you panic— but then he's back!!! and everything is normal again between the two of you! well,,, kind of?

weirdly, he prefers calls and texts over facetime now. and yes, it is kinda odd that he never talks about his job at alchemax anymore. nor does he reply as quickly to your calls or texts,,, but you don't mind! of course, he hasn't been exactly told you what happened but he swears he will. eventually. at some point.

you hear on the news about a new villain causing chaos and shit around where he lives so you— having no clue— tell him to stay extra safe!

you also ask him abt wtf is going on there becuz??? hello? does shit like that just happen in new york?

yeah so he doesn't tell you. but he can't hide it forever.

especially because he's not the only one with secrets! you've got the plane ticket already, excited to surprise him with a visit.

ft. crappy edit of the meme becuz i cant stop giggling 2 myself. itz not even funny im jus amused easily (*´ｰ｀)ゞ

#val's 💭 #atsv #across the spiderverse #the spot #the spot x reader #johnathan ohnn #johnathon ohnn #he would NOT text like that btw #i just think the meme is funny leave me alone #''okay yay ❤️'' while ur boyfie causes mass destruction w/out u even knowing #i don't write much for him anymore but i was bestowed a silly vision #i had to answer

[1-800-luvmail]

guys im gonna be completely honest idgaf abt jacob elordi HOWEVER... hear me on this hc: könig would sit like him.

he's not ashamed of his massive height and the amount of space he takes up, BUT— whether intentionally or unintentionally— könig sits like he's dainty. point it out and he'll get defensive becuz he's just trying to be comfortable.

will end up hyper aware of his sitting habits if anyone points it out, which will cause him to shift position every so often. spoilers: it still looks like he's sitting like hes petite (｡・・｡)

#val's 💭 #cod #könig #cod mw2 #cod mwii #cod warzone #sorry this is funny to me #needed to shitpost #slash jay #kind of... #jus a cutie im ngl #he's in my BRAINNN #GET HIM OUT GET HIM OUT

[1-800-luvmail]

hobie would def share clothes, and yes 100% canon that gwen steals them from her friends but LISTEN TO ME FOR A SEC. when miles g morales is close w/ u like that??? ur closet is an extension of his own.

it doesn't matter if your styles are literal opposite, he WILL find ways to style ur shit and look good wearing it

sizing is not an issue either. you're bigger than him? literally who gaf if it's baggy, he prefers it that way. you're smaller than him? it fits cropped bro idk what to tell you.

"miles, that's my hoodie—"

"not anymore."

#val's 💭 #miles g morales #miles 42 #atsv #across the spiderverse #miles g morales x reader #miles 42 x reader #miles g morales headcanons #miles 42 headcanons #atsv headcanons #it's hard to even be mad becuz why tf does he rock ur clothes so well #im telling you we'd be best friends #atsv x reader

[1-800-luvmail]

the nerve.

「 tws + notes: unedited, canon... violence? i mean nothing really happens, reader is just a weird lil fella (affectionate), not a meet cute,,, more like a meet stupid 」

「 gn!reader, no relationships established 」

↳ ft. montgomery gator

author's note: i had a whole idea for this. don't ask me what though becuz i have no clue anymore (｡•́-ก̀｡) ... like, the general idea (iirc correctly) was that eventually they'd be buddies and the reader would pretend to wanna help w/ the bonnie mystery or sumn while trying to fulfill their own motives— but whatever. but i clearly did not get to that at all (´｀;) and yes!!! the title is a reference to the song by the brobecks (⑅˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈ )

bright neon lights shine down onto your face as you step into the pizzaplex. there's no denying you feel out of place.

the commercialized rock music blasting from the speakers, the loud, boisterous, laughter of children, the eye-bleeding colours surrounding you— a complete sensory nightmare, all in one massive labyrinth of a building.

this would have terrified you in any other circumstance. and it does. yet, for some reason, you feel the corners of your mouth twitch up slightly at the sight of this place.

the allure of the pizzaplex is undeniable to anyone who approached it— but your fascination was something different entirely.

you were just here to observe the strange ways in which this place operated. you heard rumors... small whisperings that fazbear entertainment had somehow missed when cleaning up their image. they had a fair share of skeletons in their closet. and you, ever curious, wanted to see what hid behind that shining reputation.

the company's origins were largely covered up for the most part. all online research came up inconclusive, and for what you managed to scrape up, it ended up being nothing more than forgotten webpages, blog posts, and left over negative reviews.

you knew one thing for certain though: the mess all started with the animatronics.

so, no, you weren't here for the arcade, the pizza, the live performances— that was all low priority for you. you were here to examine the technology that they used.

making your own entertainment out of something that you'd otherwise not bother to take a second glance at, all while uncovering secrets that you've always wanted to hear? this is something you simply can't resist.

you'd do anything to find out the truth.

families and their children, teenagers looking for something to do– those were the people the pizzaplex intended to draw in. but of course, an establishment built on a shady foundation which never discloses their history that runs a high tech entertainment center is bound to draw in another demographic: people who want to uncover secrets. 

you knew a fair share of urban explorers online— mostly fans— who’d try to break in after hours to get to places guests shouldn’t be, steal stuff they definitely aren’t meant to get their hands on (you recall specifically when snagged some seasonal accessories meant from glamrock chica which was… well. weird and specific but whatever), find merch in the back that went unsold or discontinued, or even just try to see if they still had bonnie's parts somewhere in the back.

that was a whole other thing in itself. you didn't know why that bunny was so popular, but it was undeniable the mystery of his sudden decommission was intriguing. you had decent knowledge on it. begrudgingly so. most people clogged online forums filled with their theories on it.

no matter what they were there for, they were practically always caught. they'd go explore but swiftly get caught, receiving hefty fines for trespassing and lifetime bans. if they were lucky enough to escape, they'd still get in trouble within the next few days. naturally, most people kept their investigations online. it was the smart thing to do.

but none of them were searching for what you wanted. you didn't care about the dead stock in the back, the animatronics seasonal accessories, and hell— not even the bonnie mystery.

so maybe it wasn't all too surprising you came to visit.

the first time you came, the establishment was in full swing. the busiest time for the pizzaplex, on the busiest day. you ended up watching a performance, grabbed some overpriced food to eat (the food made exclusively by staff bots- how fascinating...) and then, just picked up and left.

you weren't gonna stay and chat with the animatronics when they were being swarmed by children and devoted fans. no way. crowds were bad enough. crowds of children? you shudder just thinking of it.

the next few times, you were careful. you noted patterns of active hours and made sure to arrive right about when the daycare closed, in order to avoid the larger crowds. in the last few hours of the pizzaplex being open, you’d finally be able to stick around until closing to walk around and explore.

no, you never met your goal of actually talking to the animatronics, despite your interest in meeting any one of them (your social anxiety somehow was not limited to human interaction) so you just... lurked.

yes, you spent your time haunting the pizzaplex until it was time to go. with the sheer amount of hours that you spent there, you could've easily become another urban legend on the internet— the strange ghost of the pizzaplex that lurks and stalks around near closing hours. they look like a normal person– but look in their direction and they retreat! ...it might've been funny.

even though that wasn't the case, and you were practically nobody, you certainly didn't go unrecognized. ai facial recognition. what a creation! and though typically used for regulars and being able to address guests personally, it could be used for anyone who visited. not like you knew.

as you became more familiar with the place— in your cluelessness, the place became more familiar with you.

unknown to you, the working staff bots turned their heads to catch a small glimpse of you when you passed, the daycare attendant stared at you through the glass– even the glamrocks found themselves occasionally scanning the crowd for your face. you weren't just another person with too much time on your hands, you came here more often than almost any person ever had. and still, you never talked to a single one of them, never stuck around one area for too long, and didn’t have a routine to your visits. your motives remained unclear to them.

saturdays were more hectic than usual, and if you were even the slightest bit more sane, you would've at least thought twice to try and spend a full day here, opening to closing.

lucky for you, you did consider it twice! you thought it over many times– unfortunately, you were still lacking any form of sanity.

instead of just leaving at closing as per usual, you decided you would somehow hide after closing hours to explore the place once all operations had been shut down.

easy enough in your head. you knew a couple spots which were typically off limits to most people that you could camp out in undetected, previously used by more successful urban explorers. then you'd snoop around a bit more, and then sneak back out again. simple.

all you needed to do was avoid staff bots. challenging, yes, but not impossible.

the fated day came and went— and as they announced for closing and people trickled out, you knew that your day began.

finally. you would have some answers.

—

oh god. this was a bad idea. very, very bad.

something you hadn't known, was that the glamrocks doubled as security. they roamed the pizzaplex after hours in search of any intruders.

this fact really would've been humorous, if it wasn't absolutely terrifying right now. the things you were stalking were now stalking the halls for you.

so, here you were, in the darkened arcade, crouching in a corner, sandwiched between the walls and an unplugged game machine. you clasped your hand over your mouth to stifle your breathing, hearing large footsteps approaching.

don't make noise. don't move. don't even think of it. you watch as it passes, scanning the area for any sort of trouble. the silhouette of the animatronic is far enough to be blurry, but it would definitely notice you if you made any rash decisions. you count in your head mentally, making sure to wait until the coast is clear.

one. two… three… four. five. uh… six?... nothing— …nothing seems to be happening. oh fuck okay wait it turned around— go time! you thought to yourself. impatience was a vice. you’d come to realize that soon.

you slowly get up, elbows and knees awkwardly knocking against the wall and arcade machine noisily as you stand.

that's when you see a large figure slowly turn back around— no doubt, due to your loud attempt at getting out of your stupid hiding spot. your eyes widen in horror, trying to figure out which one it was, and if it had really seen you.

the large animatronic gator, you soon recognized, in fact did see you! it was rapidly heading your way after all.

squeezing out your hiding spot, you book it, making sure to try and get away as far as you possibly can— but it's no use.

fazbear entertainment made these things fast as fuck.

you find yourself backed into a wall, being stared down by an animatronic gator who looks like he's restraining himself from ripping you to shreds on the spot. you back into the wall, trembling.

his eyes scan you— and there's sudden recognition. unfortunately, it doesn't seem like a good thing, considering how he just seems to become more agitated by your presence.

he snarls, bearing his teeth at you. the razor sharp quality of the metal in his mouth make you wonder why this animatronic is allowed to be in an entertainment place for kids.

"you've got a lot of nerve, runt."

you stare like a deer in headlights. you didn’t run. you didn't move. your panic completely freezes you over, brain too busy thinking of a way to get out of this, to leave this place alive.

a claw lifts you up by the collar of your shirt, forcing you to meet his eyes. 

"shit— no, no, no, please ‘m sorry—" your voice is shaking as you desperately search for the words to explain yourself. or at least get out of the situation you’re in. you thrash in his grasp to no avail.

it's all beginning to feel very humiliating. you wasted all this time for nothing. you weren't any detective. just someone with too much time. now, you'd probably die as a random, faceless, nobody who spent too much time at an entertainment center that catered to children's birthday parties.

at least you thought this cause of death was somewhat funny. despite how pathetic it was.

still, everything in your head was urging you to stay alive. even for a few minutes difference.

and suddenly, fight or flight weren't the only options you had anymore. a third one, scintillating and enticing, had graced your thoughts like an angel descending from the heavens.

lying.

"i just— i know it's weird and i shouldn't have trespassed, but i needed to talk to you after hours—" you ramble, your efforts feeling more futile as he lifts you closer, as if to eat you alive. you steel yourself.

"i just need to ask you about bonnie."

the gator goes unnaturally still at your words.

and then it ends here because nothing else was written. where was this gonna go? guess we'll never know. i don't remember where this was going either (。_。)

#the junkyard scraps #montgomery gator #fnaf sb #fnaf security breach #fnaf fanfic #montgomery gator x reader #but not really #maybe i'll continue this #probably... not.

[1-800-luvmail]

— ✉️ ...there's a crumpled letter in the trash can.

* open it ?

HELLO!! i see you've found the trash blog!!

i'm valentine, i use she/he/it prns and this is my side blog for @l0vem41l !!!

scroll down for important things like tags, and other info!

— TAGS !

[ TAG: #the junkyard scraps ] - discarded and unfinished fic/hc drafts

[ TAG: #val's 💭 ] - ideas or concepts that aren't fleshed out, throwaway posts

[ TAG: #valentine's rambles ] - i ramble abt stuff :p

– OTHER INFO !

any dividers that arent just my plain blue line are made by @cafekitsune !! all credz go to them for those super cute ones ^_^

this is really just a place for me to put work that isn't good enough (or complete enough) to go on my main so,,, (｡・・｡) not much 2 say

i'm a sfw blog and strictly sfw! while i don't interact with nsfw accounts, i don't care if you're an nsfw blog interact w/ me

keep everything non-explicit in msgs, asks, and reqs and it'll be fine (*^▽^*)

#intro post #rules and info

[1-800-luvmail]

[ this sideblog will be set up soon! ]