8bitbrandt

[8bitbrandt]

A million times this

[8bitbrandt]

More care than you think

This is my attempt at a feel good post. I honestly think people dont realize how much others care for them or how much they care for others. We do a lot of things and have a lot of things done to/for us without thinking about it. Some things I realized:

I turn around to make sure my dog doesn't run out the door after me whenever I take the trash out. Everytime he sees me look he just sits down and watches me through the glass. He gets super excited when I come back in.

My wife gives me all her croutons from her salad because she doesn't like them and I love them. Either puts them on my salad if I got one or puts them on a plate for me

My younger brother calls me everytime he reaches a milestone in a game that I've already played to talk to me about it and share what he felt.

While my wife is getting ready for bed I put her pillows in their "spots" and plug her phone in for her so her side of the bed is good to go

One of my really good friends knows my favorite beer and brings 6 pack over whenever we have board game night. He's not even that big of a fan of it

Another friend calls me every day as he is driving between jobsites to just shoot the shit and see what's up

I noticed a friend of mine always drinks diet mountain dew. I bought a bunch and put it in my fridge so he would have something to drink at game night because he doesn't drink booze. He was stoked when he opened my fridge up.

So yeah, the world is full of little things that shows you are a decent person and there are people in your life who care for you. You just gotta pay attention to notice it

[8bitbrandt]

I don't know why I'm throwing this out to the ether but I need to just.... get it out of my mind and see it in front of me to try to come to terms with it. I don't want to put this on my Facebook and have people think I'm throwing a pity party or trying to bitch about my situation so here I am: posting on my Tumblr out to a sea of people that I don't personally know 99% of. I just need to vent. 7 weeks ago at 1145pm I had the STUPIDEST accident. I went to pick up a glass cup in the kitchen and when my hand touched it, the whole thing just shattered. I didn't grip it hard or slam my hand down on it. I just picked up a glass. I guess it was old or already had a crack in it or something but whatever it was, it shattered in my hand and sliced 99% of the tendons in my middle finger. I'll explain how it was 99% and not 100% later. What really stood out to me was how much it didn't hurt and how much blood there was. I felt like I FILLED the sink as I stared at my hand in disbelief from how much blood there was compared to what basically equated to a pinprick amount of pain. I tried to move it .... and I couldn't. That was a weird and frightening experience; to tell your body to do something and it just...won't. It can't. No matter how badly I wanted to move my finger, I couldn't. I wrapped my finger in paper towels to try and stop the bleeding while yelling for my wife that we need to go to the ER. She takes me and after getting my finger cleaned up and stitches to close up the gash, the doctor tells me he's positive I completely severed at least 1 of the 2 tendons in my finger and more than likely partially severed the second. Next day I call in to work for the foreseeable future until I can have a hand specialist look me over. I go to see one later that day and it was a day I'll never forget. As the doctor is looking at my hand and the xrays from the ER, he asks me what I do for a living. I tell him I work with my hands installing security and camera equipment. Not a glamorous job but I'm good at it and it more than pays our bills. He asks if I play any instruments. I tell him yes, I've been playing bass guitar since I was in 7th grade and stand-up bass since high school. He asks if my right hand is my dominant hand. I tell him yes. The doctor takes a deep breath... looks me in the eyes (I can see he does NOT want to tell me what he's about to tell me) and he says, "You're going to need surgery. Left alone, you'll never have any movement or feeling in the upper half of your finger and you will never have the same control or movement because 1 full tendon plus most of the other have been completely severed. We can reattach them but it's a minimum 8 weeks of not using your right hand at all. You wont be able to work because your line of work is a huge risk of you resnapping the tendons and your hand will be in even worse shape then it is now.... what do you want to do?" What did I want to do? I wanted my hand back! But, I have no insurance AND my wife had been let go from her job the day after we got back from vacation which was a week before my accident. My income was the only thing keeping us afloat while we waited for unemployment and/or my wife to find a new job. Now, I need surgery and wont be able to work for a minimum of 8 weeks. On top of that, after surgery I would have to some very intensive physical therapy for a minimum of 3 months or else my finger would stiffen up from the scar tissue and I would lose all mobility even though I had the surgery to reattach the tendons. Even with surgery and physical therapy it wasn't a guarantee I would have 100% use of my hand again. Surgery just bettered my odds. I set up surgery for 2 days later that week. I then walked out to my car and cried. I'm 28 years old. I haven't cried in over a decade. Sure I've gotten teary eyed during a movie and the sniffles after a bad fight with my wife that I felt bad over.... but I haven't CRIED in 10 years. I couldn't see through all the tears, I couldn't catch my breath because of my sobbing. It all hit me at once what the doctor told me: I may never be able to do anything the same again. I'm right-handed, and that was the hand I injured. I might not be able to play my bass guitar with my fingers like I was trained. Even trying to use a pick will be a challenge because i might not be able to bend my middle finger enough to get it out of the way to strum the strings. I might not be able to ever hold my bow for my stand up bass correctly anymore. I love to cook and i might not have same dexterity or even ability to hold a knife or utensil correctly in my dominant hand anymore. I cried because of that and then for how selfish I felt FOR crying. People out there have WAY worse situations than me and make it work and here I am losing my shit in a hospital parking lot over a cut on my finger. But most of all I cried because of how worthless I felt. My income was what was keeping us on par with our bills and debt. Now I can't work and neither of us have insurance because we make too much money to get state or federal assistance BUT we don't make enough money to pay 500-700 a month out of our own pocket and still be able to pay our mortgage and put food on the table. So now I'm not working and need surgery which we will have to pay out of pocket plus physical therapy which the doctor estimated would be 100ish per session and I need to go AT LEAST once a week to see improvements in my hand.... So I'm out of work for at least 8 weeks and will be wracking up a 400+ physical therapy bill every month on top of whatever unholy number I'll have to pay to cover my surgery..... just so I can MAYBE have full usage of my dominant hand again. I never cried so hard and felt so worthless in my life. I feel like I'm letting my wife down and pulling us further into debt that I can't see us getting out of all because I picked up a fucking glass cup.... My wife and I are trying to make things work financially. She found a new job and is waiting on a background to clear for a better one and I've been doing things like Postmates and focusing on my real estate career more. I actually sold my first house all on my own and closed it 2 weeks after my surgery. That victory was short lived when I realized that the money from the house that was supposed to get us ahead of the curve and give us some financial breathing room turned into putting us not AS behind on our bills because I'm not working my security job while doing real estate. And physical therapy? My therapist says I'm making great progress but it doesn't feel like it and it's really hard to see myself ever playing my basses again or having anything remotely similar to the use and dexterity I had before. The last picture on this post is of my hand today (Aug 3, 2018) while I'm trying to make a fist.... that's the best I can do... I can't play my bass guitar with my fingers or a pick; my middle finger is in the way and doesn't have the strength to do anything. I can't properly hold my bow any more. I have to have my wife cut up things like onions for me when I cook because I can't use my right hand well enough any more and I'm afraid I'm going to further injure myself trying to cut things with my left hand and end up cutting another tendon in my right.... In the grand scheme of things and compared to other people, I get my injury isn't that big of a deal. But I feel so useless that I can't pull the weight I used to and the fact that I'm making our financial situation worse instead of improving it. I don't know what to do or how I can make things better. Writing this post isn't going to do much I know... but it felt good to get all my thoughts out and just put them somewhere else rather than just in my head. Here's hoping that things get better

[8bitbrandt]

I wait for the day i can do this to my family

[WHEEZE]

[8bitbrandt]

Yaaaaaasss

“Even if we can’t find heaven, I’ll walk through hell with you.

You’re not alone.”

[8bitbrandt]

12/22/2017

Reblog If You Can Take Off Your Bra Without Taking Your Shirt Off.

[8bitbrandt]

Lawls

[8bitbrandt]

Millennials are Killing the Internet

I’ve already commented on one post, but I can’t with a clean conscience sit by without making my own.

I see so many posts about Net Neutrality, and while I think it’s tremendous how many of you are emailing the FCC, some of those emails aren’t going to change minds.

Some of you are emailing the chairman himself. Ajit Pai was a former Verison employee. It doesn’t matter how many emails you send to him. You could literally tell him that you depend on the Internet’s resources to live, and he would not bat an eye.

Many of you are putting in your emails that hospitals and schools will see troubles. I appreciate the effort, but when these men are the very same men who have already taken SO MUCH from hospitals and schools, will they?

What you NEED to do, is speak their language. That language is dollar signs. Make your voice sound like MONEY THEY WILL BE LOSING.

We live in a nation where restaurants are failing because no one can afford a $20 meal anymore. What makes the FCC think we can afford more than $60 Internet? E-commerce is essential to the US economy. If users are forced to go through paywall after paywall, they will STOP purchasing anything off the Internet. The nosedive in stocks will be the likes of nothing you’ve ever seen.

Without the freedom to choose which websites we visit, the internet, for many of you on Tumblr like me, will become virtually meaningless. Make THAT the message you spread to these two “Yes votes.” Tell them that if the Internet becomes just like cable TV, which none of us are able to afford, they will LOSE the few dollars we have.

They’ll be interested in hearing that.

These are the emails of the two FCC members voting “yes” on the repeal of NN. If anyone’s mind is going to be changed. It has to be one of these guys. And it has to be before December 14th.

[email protected]

Mike.O'[email protected]

If we speak their language, there may still be hope. Good luck, everyone.

[8bitbrandt]

[8bitbrandt]

I enjoy drawing those text posts out there. Inspired by [x]

[8bitbrandt]

And then get a dlc 2 months later of the same size that actually FINISHES the game because the studio cared more about getting the game out then creating a COMPLETED product.

i’m really glad i got a physical copy of this brand new game so i can download 60GB off the disc and then install an 11GB update and then go through all these opening logos to get to the main menu and then a 5 minute loading screen before finally getting into the 12 minute cutscene before playing the hour long tutorial teaching me how to play the game.

[8bitbrandt]

Something I wish more people would understand…

[8bitbrandt]

At least it wasn't to the knee

[8bitbrandt]

me: *puts earphones in*

me:

me:

me:

me:

me:

me:

me:

me:

me:

me: oh right

me: *plays music*

[8bitbrandt]

A reminder: Women can be every bit as horrible, creepy and misogynistic as any sad loner stalker dude on Reddit can be.  

Christ. I have male friends. They’d never even think or say out loud such horrific, monstrous things. Not once.

Misogyny is not limited to gender, you understand.  

[8bitbrandt]

Reblog if you would be devastated if you found out one of your followers committed suicide.

[8bitbrandt]

Experiment:

Put your Hogwarts House, your Pokemon Go team, and your star sign in the tags

#team instinct #gryffindor #capricorn