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interesting fact i have titanium in my spine

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what are you guys’ most “tumblr is a website” moments

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I let Pangur meet Belphie again, and she hissed real wide while blowing a snot bubble

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Grim has decided the kitten is annoying, so I try to help the situation by slipping her treats whenever he's around.

unfortunately, the kitten also wants the treats.....

#what a wonderful image

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pete is so. the way he is. because. hes just so. the way he is. like everyone writes about him and perceives him like hes this all powerful mafioso mercenary of emo-- high up on a throne surrounded by cronies and drinking blood out of a goblet. and in many ways this is completely and unequivocally true. however he is also....... just so pathetic about it? hes like so dripping wet and mewling everyone is like "aww.... wookit him. isnt he sweet?"

like yes he bribed a journalist before a fob album was previewed. but he had to call his girl first and whine at her to come hand him the money out of her purse like an eight year old at chuck e cheese.

like yes he owned a bar full of machine guns where famous women would get into screaming matches over him and give him public lapdances like a minor character in the godfather who dies horribly onscreen while having sex with his favorite million dollar prostitute. but it also had two and a half stars on yelp and was shut down by the cops.

no one else is doing it like this. when he said only child of the universe did he mean this

#knowing more about pete wentz has never made me understand pete wentz more

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so good right now - fall out boy

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How old were you at the lowest point in your life? Reblog this and put it in the tags, plus your current age maybe. I'm trying to see something.

#i think 15 as well LMAO #im 20 now #i mean 19 is a close contender ngl #but nothing can beat suddenly developing severe ocd near overnight at the ripe age of 15 babyyyyy

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"i want them to have a textured wall... like some padding... a sex wall" they say the literal day after posting pictures of their bedroom, where there is a textured wall behind their bed. thanks for insight into your phouse design choices i guess

they shared too much in this i think... dan and phil designing a house be like ok so how many places to fuck can we fit in this thing

#if they actually knew how to play the sims they cpuld actually put more woohoo-able items in their builds </3

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CUM SORRY MILK??

oh you know

real talk the comments on this are so funny. nov 15th 2009. they never stood a fucking chance

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rewatching the latest wdapteo and it's actually insane that it didnt click for me until now that it's bonkers that theyre even saying "we" when it comes to potentially paying for someones onlyfans. even their porn is a shared purchase what the fuck i hate them

this makes all the sense in the world to me to be fair. like yeah of course dan and phil share porn

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them being like “dil and tabitha NEED to bang in the cop uniform”… we should all know less about each other

what was REALLY in this chest. underneath all the video costumes and props. what were you hiding dan and phil

its been a decade and a half, they gotta keep it fresh somehow. i am however more worried than ever about the state of that poor nun costume

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favorite ditl: fditl // dpgdaily's dnpaw - day 4/7

#people saw this and kept believing they are straight for 5 more years

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Alright kitten listen up cause mommy needs your help here okay. Pause the game, ok-PAUSE the game for mommy okay I need your eyes up here, kitten. I'm putting these onions in this pan okay and im gonna walk out the door yes, that's right mommy's gotta go right now mommy's gotta go for 8 hours but she needs these onions caramelized by the time she gets bac-STOP LOOKING AT THE COMPUTER mommy needs you to caramelized these onions for her okay kitten mommy needs all 5 pounds perfectly caramelized and cooked down till they're all evenly brown and sweet and YES it does need to take the whole 8 hours mommy needs you to babysit these fucking carmies okay kitten I SAID TURN THE FUCKING GAME OFF

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phil was like hey so today we’re dressing dan as a pig. he looks so good. i wish he was gold all the time. pigs cum for an hour and a half btw