antiquetupperware

[antiquetupperware]

i love products that make up words that sound like they could've come from tumblr

[antiquetupperware]

being jotaro kujo must have been insane. you are 17 years old. one day you wake up and a purple ghost is haunting you. all it does is punch people and get you beer. you lock yourself into jail. all the prisoners are scared of you. your xenophobic american grandpa shows up with his psychic egyptian friend and tells you you need to kill your bisexual vampire half-great-grunkle to save your mother. suddenly, you're on the worst road trip in the history of mankind with a frenchman, a dog, an autistic nerd, a psychic, and your xenophobic grandpa with a metal hand. you have to fight an orangutan, a cowboy, a baby, a falcon, and the sun, all in the span of 60 days. all of your friends die

[antiquetupperware]

[antiquetupperware]

no alcohol in this flask girl this is miso soup

[antiquetupperware]

Okay Walter White was actually pretty funny as a character bc he was so toxic that seasoned drug lords were like I cannot work w this man I have to put my mental health first

[antiquetupperware]

merry boobmas

[antiquetupperware]

tis the season

[antiquetupperware]

I make fun of coffee drinkers for being physically addicted to and dependent on badbreath bitterdrink but when i dont have my morning tea i feel like a mentally ill caveman about to do something bad.

[antiquetupperware]

IT'S TIME

[antiquetupperware]

if you like f/i/l/l/i/n/g/s/t/o/c/k/i/n/g/s then every north pole elf loves you

[antiquetupperware]

"i don't know why i find this so funny," it is because of your jovial soul and jokester's disposition, my boy! (quaffs ale) (claps you on the back too hard)

[antiquetupperware]

CW // very hungry caterpillar

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im shakingg bro he fuckifnf ate everythi ng even my fuckign choco.late cake im gonna sta;rve

[antiquetupperware]

A job I was applying for mentioned I would be working with something called a “frosted flatwoods salamander”, which sounded positively delightful, so I looked them up and I could not be more pleased with what this beast looks like

[antiquetupperware]

why do cats have an extra bean on their wrist... what is if for..

[antiquetupperware]

I'm going to start traumacore posting on linkedin

[antiquetupperware]

snilent night...

holy night...

[antiquetupperware]

Tumbleweed needs everyone to know that I am his most cruel and heartless mother for decreasing the amount of food he gets due to him gaining a third again his body weight over the last year no that is not all fur Tumbleweed you are shaped like a pregnant sheep!

He has spent much of the day stomping from room to room while yelling his immense displeasure.