yknow the more jk rowlings world falls apart in america (race relations, international history, population, etc) the more i like to think that america just straight up doesnt have the statute of secrecy. european countries are falling over themselves hiding magic but come to georgia and theres a drunk redneck wizard wingardium leviosa-ing the shit out of a tractor to the delight of his drunk redneck muggle buddies in a walmart parking lot.
wizard on muggle violence is prevented by virtue of there being like a 50/50 chance that muggle is packing heat. muggle on wizard violence is prevented by knowing that wizard can give you boils spelling LIL BITCH on your forehead if you try to start something.
america is the weird redheaded stepchild of the magic world.
im not gonna stop reblogging this until this is the next Hot Fanon
english muggles come back to england and suspicious wizards meet them at the airport.
‘did you witness any strange or inexplicable acts while you were in america?’ they demand.
the english muggles just laugh in their dumb fucking faces. mate, it’s america.
what’s the difference between a werewolf and an animagus?
english wizard: *two hour lecture on legal history*
american wizard: six beers
@jumpingjacktrash congrats ive read hundreds of comments on this dumpster fire of a headcanon and yours is the best
thank you my patronus is a monster truck
I have reblogged this I don’t even fucking know how many times but I still completely lose it every time I see the words “My Patronus is a monster truck” because that is the most AMERICAN thing I’ve ever seen in 29 years of being ‘merican.
Variant: What with the International Statute of Secrecy being an international law, the American magical community suffered quite a bit at the hands of forcible attempts to make everyone conform to it, until anti-seclusionist magical forces got their hands on the sort of magics being used to hide the wizarding world from nonmagical society, and hid themselves and their communities from the magical government and its institutions.
That’s why Ilvermorny is “the only American wizarding school.” That’s why the American magical population feels like something the size of the British one pasted on something a couple orders of magnitude bigger. That’s why Fantastic Beasts And Where To Find Them is so white. That’s why nonmagical people have a persistent quiet willingness to believe in magic just enough to allow for the possibility of its existence, and fill their stories with it, and readily interact with the idea of it. It’s an elaborate homegrown smokescreen to hide hundreds of integrated magical communities from the magical community that demands magical communities keep themselves secret.
The forces behind the International Statute of Secrecy made themselves such an absolute nuisance that some 95% of the magical population of America stole their hide-from-the-muggles spells and locked them out of knowledge of their existence.
The International Wizarding Community: “You are now forbidden to let any nonmagical people know you exist.”
Six Gazillion American Wizarding Communities: *Jedi mind trick hand motions* “Fuck you, we don’t exist. Nothing to see here.”
The International Wizarding Community: “Looks like the problem’s been solved, I guess. Pip pip cheerio.”
Six Gazillion American Wizarding Communities And Their Muggle Friends: “OK I’mma cast Engorgio on my tires and invent Monster Trucking, hold my beer.”
this is the best addition to this post to date, headcanon absolutely fucking accepted
Omg, can you imagine parseltongue in Texas?
“Listen here, you fucking rattler, I do not have time to hear about the differences between hares and rabbits.”
“But the hares are sssssso tasty…”
‘Pip, pip, cheerio’ - ya know, the reason why anything outside of the French wizarding world is so sketchily rendered, is that the rest of the world has done this trick too. Durmstrang is somewhere in Scandinavia with a German name and Russian customs? It’s a hoax and at least ten countries are in on it. The Irish have no wizarding school? Maybe Seamus has very loyalist parents! Here’s England thinking it is the centre of the world, using parchment and owls, for Merlin’s sake. The rest of the world has been doing its own thing for centuries, and some schools like to humour them at times. They haven’t noticed, and Estonia especially cannot believe their complete ignorance of IT-magic.
The entire British Wizarding World has Harry Potter’s level of noticing things that don’t pertain to it.
So… completely on brand for the British Ministry of Magic as depicted in the books: absolutely oblivious even when it literally explodes in their face and murders children and shit.
Oh my gosh, so many good additions!
So what you’re saying is the wizarding community is just like
everybody loves to talk about velma and daphne but y’all seem to forget that velma and hot dog water from mystery incorporated were obviously gay
h-hot dog water?
Her name was hot dog water because her father was a carnival owner and they were so poor she had to bath with the used hot dog water. Also she was murdered by Nazi robots under the command of a Hannibal lector bird Scooby Doo influenced by a cosmic embodiment of horror but then brought back to life when Scooby Doo killed it
idk what shit-eating truscum needs to hear this, but your rhetoric directly harms people with culturally-specific genders. i’m native and two-spirit, that label describes my gender and my attraction. i use they/them pronouns and your “nonbinaries and cringey stargender trenders aren’t valid” bullshit is getting old. our languages were demonized and erased, our gender and attraction labels along with them. my experiences with dysphoria exist because of colonialist ideas of gender. we have been forced into arbitrary ‘male’ and ‘female’ categories by colonizers for centuries and truscum rhetoric perpetuates racist colonialist violence against natives.
your experiences are not universal, you’re not forwarding justice for trans people, and you’re definitely not an ally to natives or other people of color. you’re just a fucking colonizer.
non-natives, reblog this post
It’s ok if you’re not overjoyed by your recovery. It’s ok if it’s a chore. It’s ok if you have to force it. It’s a hard, bitter process for some of us, so it’s totally valid if you’d rather get worse while you’re healing. You’re still fighting the fight, and you’re doing so well.
I’ve made a playlist time to go apeshit my fellow funky friends
A selection of delightfully annoying and copyrighted music:
- It’s A Small World
- I’ve Got A Lovely Bunch of Coconuts
- Yellow Submarine
- Henry the Eighth
- Cotton Eye Joe
- The Final Countdown
- The Chicken Dance
- The Thong Song
- Disco Duck
- Ice Ice Baby
- Hanky Panky
- Peanut Butter Jelly Time
- I’m a Gummy Bear
I just imagined a whole bunch of neo-Nazis doing a rally and someone cranking “Its a small world” on repeat in the background.
oOoOO good one!
Ain’t nobody like The Mouse for that sort of thing.
hey everyone who rbed/liked/added ur own stories on.. I love you very much. A lot of u say things like “ive never seen a positivity post for someone like me before” and that’s bc there weren’t really any. There are a lot of positivity posts abt mental illness, but they rarely delve into what often happens besides “take ur meds”. I havent personally been in every situation on this list, but ive been in all but three of them: and i know it sucks. But everyday, when i step into my theraputic school, and meet everyone like me, i always wonder: “Wow. there sure are a lot of us. I wonder why i never see us in media?” And i bet so many of u have wondered the same thing. And that total lack of repersentation for severly mentally ill kids is exactly what causes us to think that we’re alone. But we’re really, really not. Thank you for being so brave and telling me your stories, and saying you needed a post like this. You are not alone, and im so proud of you for getting the help you deserve so much!!!
This is a positivity post i’ve wanted to make for months, but i am often to anxious.
Kids in the mental health system. I see you, and I love you.
🍋Kids who just got out of a ward
🍋kids who are/were in residential
🍋kids who are in IOP
🍋Kids who frequent the emergency room
🍋kids who are seeing multiple therapists
🍋kids who are in theraputic school
🍋kids shadowing/touring new schools
🍋kids surviving public school
🍋kids who are homeschooled
🍋kids who go to school for shorter days/after school
🍋kids in online school
🍋kids who arent up to going to school right now
🍋kids who dropped out of school
🍋kids who are getting help
You are not broken.
You are not wrong for being mentally ill.
You are not missing out on “regular teenage life” by needing different things.
Being mentally ill at a young age does not make you crazy.
Getting help doesn’t make you weak, it only makes you stronger.
This actually really made my day.
I’ve been recently exhausted from new treatments and just symptoms acting up. And just really feeling like shit.
So thank you.
“if you want to adopt kids at an older age, that’s just lazy and you’ll miss the important developmental years. you won’t be able to connect.” okay but consider this:
1. I will not be able to handle a baby, but I will definitely be able to manage and guide an older child
2. no diapers. hallelujah
3. As a foster child gets older, their chance of adoption plummets. Adopting an older child gives a late break to someone who would have otherwise had to age out of the system
4. my plans for adoption are none of your concern
Holy shit people actually say that? Inviting a kid in need to be part of your family is ‘lazy’?
Being there for the ‘developmental years’ is so important not having it is a dealbreaker?
‘You won’t be able to connect’ with another human being unless you’re there for their formative years, imprinting on them?
…people who make that argument should probably do a LOT of soulsearching before they consider
getting a toy babyadopting a younger child.
I had a sociology professor once and both he and his wife were registered social workers (in addition to him teaching), and after a couple of years married, they started talking about adopting a child. They’d seen the system up close, they knew how hard it was for some kids to get adopted. So when they sat down to start the fostering process, they told the agency to give them their toughest, most difficult case. If anyone could handle a kid who’d been labeled a “problem child”, it was these two people.
The agency paired them up with a 12 year old girl – the oldest they had, far, far too old to be considered for adoption typically. This girl’s birth parents had had drug problems, she’d been in and out of a couple dozen foster homes, no one able to handle her, she ran away frequently and had diagnosed behavioral problems, she was surly and defiant. When she first met them, she was clammed up tight, snarky, unwilling to trust them or anyone – and really, who could blame her?
But these two adults poured every bit of their compassion and training into this one child, into getting to know her, earning her trust by listening to her and treating her like a person who mattered. And slowly, slowly, she came around. Slowly, they built a relationship with her, and she came out of her shell. It wasn’t always smooth sailing, but having these two adults who were utterly unwilling to give up on her, or see her as the problem, let them work through each issue as it arose, and slowly they started to see this other side of her personality emerge. She joked around, she grinned often, she got excited about sports games and yelled at the tv with her foster father, she was making friends at her new school and doing better in her studies.
One day they sat her down and told her they loved her and they wanted her to legally, officially be part of their family. But they thought she deserved a say, too. If she just wanted to be fostered for the next five, six years, they could do that too. But they wanted to adopt her, they wanted to keep her for always. Did she want them? Yes, she said. Yes, I want to keep you, too.
My professor came into class one day with a grin that just would not go away, bouncing on his toes. We all wanted to know what was up. The adoption was finalized today, he told us. Today I have a daughter! And he showed us pictures of his brand new 12 year old daughter hugged between he and his wife, the three of them grinning at the camera. I’ve been her dad for awhile, he told us, but today it’s official, today we’re finally really a family.
I heard that story in the spring of 2001, when I was 20. This girl just 8 years younger than me, the age of my younger siblings, this girl who everyone had given up on. But these two people, they knew they had enough love and training to handle whatever was thrown their way, these people stayed true to the commitment of being parents, didn’t give up when the going got tough, proved slowly and methodically that they loved her, that she could trust them.
That girl must be in her late 20s now. She’s had parents for more than a decade and a half. She hasn’t had to face this scary century alone. She has parents who went with her to her freshman orientation for college, I’m certain of it. If she’s gotten married, I know her father walked her down the aisle, that same grin splitting his face, the same grin as when he announced that he had a daughter, the same grin he wore every time he talked about her. If she’s had kids, her kids have the best grandparents.
They are a family of choice built on commitment and trust and love. You can’t tell me that isn’t bonding, you cannot tell me that it’s lazy, that that was somehow easier or less worthwhile than diapers.
Hey actually this is pretty serious and should be reblogged
I thought I should finally let y'all see why Vivziepop blocked my main. So. I made a post. That detailed that it just doesn’t add up how she could have afforded to pay even a livable wage for all of her animators during their time working for Hazbin. This is due to the length of time for production, the amount of staff, etc. I think it cost somewhere between 3 to 7 million dollars worth of work.
Anyway for some context I pointed out that she makes enough money on YouTube according to multiple sites that she likely didn’t need to pull from the Hazbin fund to move to LA or she just flat out gets barely any money from YouTube because her channel was declining.
Here was her response to being asked about a living wage for all of her staff.
Please note the phrase “I paid my team more gradually as the project made more”. Now. She also implies Hazbin only cost 1 million. And she acts like she followed union standards (which I’m about to prove she didn’t) Well, that would mean each animator only got paid around 10k on average for anywhere from a year to 3 years worth of work. The average minimum wage in the US is $7.25 per hour or $15,080 per year. If you worked on Hazbin for 2 years, which was the average, according to Vivziepop you only got to make 5k per year. 1/3rd that of a minimum wage job. Now here is the kicker.
“Animators paid full time rates” was promised by Vivziepop on her patreon. Bull. Shit. You wanna know what a full time rate is for an animator based on union standards? The lowest you can go is $35k per year for an animator. She paid 1/7th of the lowest full time pay rate that the union approves of. She did this knowingly. This is why she targeted animators not in a union. She didn’t want a union to shut her project down. If she paid her animators by union standards Hazbin would have cost 3 to 7 million based on the size of her staff. The reason a pilot typically costs 1 million is because no one dallies and the pilot takes 4 to 6 months to be animated. She straight up is either lying about the budget or she is hiding that she severely underpaid her staff and that Hazbin and Helluva Boss were made with unsavory business practices. She blocked me because I called her out on this and pointed out the math. Just let that sink in.
After Ferguson, a viral photo turned the tween into a symbol of post-racial America. But his murder — at the hands of his adoptive white mother — shows how much of an illusion that all really was
We don’t yet know if 15-year-old Devonte Hart died when his adoptive white mother, Jen Hart, 38, stomped on the gas pedal and drunkenly, intentionally, drove her 2003 GMC right off the edge of America. We do know the SUV plunged 100 feet down the cliffside and crashed into the Pacific Ocean, killing her, along with Sarah Hart, 38, Devonte’s other adoptive white mother, and four of his siblings:
- Markis, 19
- Jeremiah, 14
- Abigail, 14
- Ciera, 12
The apparent murder-suicide remains an open mystery.
At present, Devonte is listed as missing. Local authorities haven’t recovered his body, nor have they located his sister, Hannah Hart, 16.
(Devontes bio mom) Sherry Davis’ children were forcibly removed from her home by Texas authorities due to her struggle with cocaine addiction. Davis, who was complying with her court-ordered drug treatment program, also fought to get her children home. But before she could get them back, they were adopted by a couple in Minnesota: the Harts.
In light of what we now know about his murderous adoptive white mothers — who’d been cited for a pattern of repeated child abuse dating back to 2008 — this powerful image twists into a more potent symbol. A symbol of systemic failure. Far more heartbreaking than anyone imagined at the time.
If you want to everything click HERE
WHAT THE FUCK
There’s a podcast called “Broken Harts” that goes deep into this case, including interviews with biological relatives of the children, including an aunt who had custody and lost it because she left the kids with their own mother one time because she had to work and had no other child care. The family lost 100% of their rights because of that. The kids were eligible for adoption after that.
The neighbors are also interviewed. Hannah, one of the little girls, jumped out a window at 1 am to ask for help from the couple next door. The wife’s father called the police (the husband didn’t want to get involved). Nothing happened.
Neighbors gave the children food regularly because they weren’t fed. CPS was called numerous times. It wasn’t taken seriously because they didn’t “look” like abusers. Over and over again, their whiteness and “niceness” allowed them to abuse six black children. This was the home the system decided was more fitting than with extended family while the parent got treatment for her Illness.
When CPS finally came to investigate, they killed them.
And that’s not even the whole story.
I remember seeing that photo of Devonte hugging the cop and how it looked to be sending a certain message and everyone said it was staged.
Now when I see it all I see is a boy sincerely begging for help.
So did these fucking demons receive any jail time????
Wolves have no right to be as cute as they are
This, this is nature’s perfect predator. 180 pounds of muscle and teeth, able to outrun, out-fight, and outsmart any other beast, able to expertly coordinate attacks so as to eviscerate animals more than ten times its size. Unfazed by weather, terrain, or distance. A creature of war.
And just … juss wook at them! Wook at these good, good boys! They’re so fluffffy! And look at their pointy widdle ears! Good boys!