ateamango

[ateamango]

So. A transmasc child is dead. Assaulted by their classmates, left to die by school staff, misgendered and deadnamed by the press. And it's about fucking time we have a serious talk about the way we discuss transmasc victimisation - or rather, the way we don't.

The dynamic is especially evident in the way we talk about terfs, and exemplified by the dichotomy: "terfs recruit trans men, but they want trans women dead". This does three separate things:

It minimises the harm terfs do to the transmascs they recruit. Terfs don't just want transmascs to join them; they want transmascs to live as women. Coerced detransition kills. Suicide rates are extremely high among transmascs, and lack of support raises them further. To want trans men to detransition is to want them dead.

It positions trans men as a threat to trans women. As, essentially, terfs waiting to reveal themselves. What should be seen as a common enemy instead becomes a new vector for division. This fear is such that a common retort against transmascs who are seen as misbehaving is "you're gonna become a terf". Trans men are scrutinised for signs of this inevitable transformation, inundated with prophecies of their induction into the cult that wants to drag them back into the worst period of their lives.

It boosts the narrative terfs want to spread about themselves. Terfs love to say they are a safe space for transmascs. It helps them sound less hateful, and it helps them recruit. In reality, terfs are extremely hateful against transmascs they see as too far gone to be targets for recruitment. They see rape and hate crimes as just desserts, they wish death on transmascs who disagree with them, they talk about trans men on hrt as roided up monsters. And yet all of that has seemingly gone under the radar, because we're just not willing to acknowledge it happens.

More broadly, transmasc victimisation is seen as a joke. There was a hilarious post going around a while back about transmascs in abusive relationships with cis men who won't let them transition - the joke being on the transmasc in that situation. Multiple posts about specifically nonbinary transmascs, characterising their fears of transphobic violence as the oppression fantasies of privileged women, their experiences of dysphoria as laughably immaterial. No negative experience is serious enough once it's stacked up against murder, and trasnmascs who have been murdered aren't exactly in position to use that fact as a gotcha, are they?

There is a broad resistance to understanding transmascs as the victims of any situation. Part of it is a sort of trans-inclusive sexism: we don't think of cis men as victims, so we can't think of trans men as victims either. But they are.

Another is plain transphobia: dismissing trans people's experiences as not that bad, irrelevant to their trans status, or entirely fabricated is old hat at this point.

A third is a kind of... weaponised transfem advocacy? Any discussion of transmasc experience can be derailed by claiming transfems are somehow being harmed by it, and any harm that befalls a transmasc person can be dismissed by conjuring a hypothetical transfem who would have had it worse. And it sure seems like great allyship at the moment, despite the fact that it doesn't actually help transfems at all.

We often urge transmascs to be the protectors of transfems. Trans solidarity is crucial. But unless we are able to also conceptualise transmascs as needing protection, our solidarity will remain incomplete. And transmascs will continue to die, and be buried twice, both outside the trans community and inside it.

[ateamango]

"the ceo of tumblr is an idiot" and "a lot but Not All Trans Women:tm: on tumbler are doing trans men really dirty in order to try to pull the ladder up" are two things that can coexist on this stupid fucking website

[ateamango]

#whitewomantears

[ateamango]

we've all gone through friendless periods in our lives. don't fall into the trap of thinking there's something intrinsically wrong with you - that is a) untrue and b) a belief that will make your isolation grow and cause feelings of worthlessness that will prevent you from accepting people into your life because you feel like you're not deserving of their friendship

[ateamango]

doing my own research on the topic.

[ateamango]

"terfs like trans men!" "trans men don't have to worry about terfs!"

Oh I'm sorry wasn't there a big thing throughout 2020-2022 where everyone was all like "little girls are mutilating their bodies!", "what happened to our lesbians!?", "scared women are pretending to be men.", and so on? Wasn't there a literal book that talked about trans men, talking about them as if they were innocent girls who were lied to and thus were destroying themselves because of it, saying how we needed to 'save them from the hypnotization!"? Weren't there numerous bloggers/youtubers who made commentary videos in reaction to Elliot Page coming out, and proceeded to rant and rave how we are losing such beautiful women and lesbians to the "transgender agena"? What about the time where it was trending to fakeclaim trans people, whom most of the targets of this were trans men? How about when people called trans men 'dykes' because "well they're not actual men, they're just confused lesbians!"?

Do I need to add more, or do you guys understand?

[ateamango]

Things we learn in Chainsaw Man chapter 135:

More people are joining the Chainsaw Man church because the fake Chainsaw Man is hot.

The Horsewomen of the Apocalypse are all face-blind. Or possibly face-apathetic, but the effect's the same.

Asa recites poetry in her head, and Yoru has to listen.

Fami can break into your house to mooch off you and there's nothing you can do to stop her.

Asa said "It's not like I like Chainsaw Man," which is just about the most tsundere thing a manga character can say that doesn't include "b-baka".

She's also such a badass that once she starts hunting devils regularly, people start wondering whether she secretly stole all of Chainsaw Man's kills.

[ateamango]

[ateamango]

physically disabled people talking about oppression and violence that affects them specifically are not hurting you and they’re not “just like terfs” you terminally online baby gay dumbasses. you are constantly shrieking on main about how special and unique and misunderstood and hated you are but you literally treat quadriplegics like we’re fucking aliens and also a hate movement against you specifically for having blogs and it’s honestly hmm pathetic as fuck

the real world will not conform to your theories and assumptions just because you’re super duper “leftist” and have hypermobility. the disability rights movement has its own history unique from tumblr and queer rights. you don’t get to just pretend it doesn’t because you don’t like it when wheelchair users speak and are listened to and think your stupid ass is the arbiter of accessibility

[ateamango]

cis people who worry too much about trans people hitting on them are so funny i just cant understand them. are you scared of winning the lottery too?

[ateamango]

things to update after a legal name change!

Social security card

Driver’s license

Passport

Birth certificate

Employer HR

Bank account

Credit card company

Car insurance

Health insurance

Utilities

Cell phone account

Voter registration

Your school

Professional organizations (for nursing, bar, teaching, etc.)

Doctor’s office & other health specialists

TV & internet

Paypal

*Please add to this list if you can think of anything else!!!

[ateamango]

The Lake

[ateamango]

[ateamango]

the "gender criticals" have now clocked a pregnant cis woman

[ateamango]

Every single person I know who did football in high school, without exception, has a chronic injury. Many regret what it's done to their knees and back, even major organs like the brain.

There is no serious legislative push to ban high school football.

[ateamango]

im not gonna deny that a lot of transfems have a hard time passing & that T giving facial hair & voice changes while E doesn't get rid of those things creates a different passing experience for many. but god so many people are so obsessed with the idea of the Hyperprivileged Passing Trans Man they end up saying shit like "well transfems can't pass and will never pass and are doomed to be clocked forever because E barely changes anything and this is very progressive and not transmisognistic because it makes them the Most Oppressed"

[ateamango]

no one should be killed for it but i hate this homework