beans-loves

[beans-loves]

I don’t know when I’ll fully heal

But I do know when that time comes,,, I’ll be relieved

[beans-loves]

Maybe one day, your eyes will open and you’ll realize that it was me all along

#whatislove #beansloves #freewrite #freethought

#what is love #free write #free thought

[beans-loves]

I want you to see me…

When you ask me what’s wrong, the words that leave my lips are “I’m fine.”

But if you look into my eyes, you can see the sadness in them; the hurt.

If you look at my cheeks, you’ll see that tears stain them. Tears caused by those that don’t understand.

My shoulders? They’re slouched because of all the weight that has been placed on them. Weight that cause me to think, “is it all worth it?”

My arms? You’ll see scars. Then judge me because of them without realizing each scar has their own story.

My legs and hands? They’re shaking. Legs; because just like me, they’re ready to give up. Arms; because of the anxiety creeped in and took over.

Defeated and sad.

You don’t see that. You see who you want to see. And judge because it’s easy.

When you look into my eyes, you mistaken the sadness for stars.

I smile and you’re fooled. Thinking everything is alright. Little did you know that smile is a mask I’m wearing to avoided the question, “what’s wrong?”

But you don’t look.

Not carefully.

For once, can you just see me?

[beans-loves]

It hurts when the people you least expect to hurt you,,,do it. It hurts to the core. And the reason why is because you had your guard up for everyone but them. They saw a side of you that no one else saw,,, a side no one else got to experience; the real you. The soft, warm, loving you. You trust them even though you have trust issues and you give them your all. Then they rip your heart out of your chest. And your chest hurts and your left with nothing but an empty hole. It’s then your eyes open and you realize that you have no one. You never did. You realize that your friends aren’t your friends and your family isn’t your family. And that it’s every man for themselves in this world.

[beans-loves]

I have this firm belief that things happen for a reason but sometimes I really hate how events played out in my life

#loner #sad boi hours #abuse #what is love