bellshazes

[bellshazes]

people have been saying this for 10 years

im about to join the war on rpf on the side of rpf. WHERE is the ethubs sex tape

#sorry. bye. #i keep trying to say something else abt the ******* *** **** but frankly i dont want to think abt jt again #iykyk

[bellshazes]

why was etho obsessed with how broke bdubs was in mindcrack s3. of all the things to fake concern over (it is cover for him stealing all of the b team quartz shop stock when hoppers are first released) but it happens over and over. really funny for the guy with a current day shopping addiction bit

#the arena installation comments feel a lot like oh hes so poor thats why im helping out :/ #rifling thru his chests to be like bdubs so broke he doesnt even have cobble..... poor guy......

[bellshazes]

Sam called to let my know a) my dad is moving parishes (very juicy gossip) and b) he was playing minecraft the last time she called him. I want to make B and him play with me so bad

#slept in til 1130 no balloons this yr :(

[bellshazes]

googling the source of a quote i heard at an educator's conference panel presented by radical youth work deleuzean psychotherapists last year and ending up on a master's thesis on the gender idelogoy of kpop rpf fanfiction in my attempt to explain why i think judith butler was mean about paris is burning and what that means for healthcare. where AM i

#peter posts #this is mostly a series of coincidences #but that panel changed my life. they explained rhizomes perfectly. too bad they're ultrareligious

[bellshazes]

"haha the first two songs of I Have Made a Place talk about dreaming as a way to connect with others what's Devils Throat got for me"

devils throat:

#RUINSFIC #REALISA ONUM BABEY #>:[[[[[[

[bellshazes]

the other day i drove past ollie's trolley omw to a different diner and i did think, as i often do, of the Memory Box bit.

#peter posts #also i accidentally froze on INFINTE CHILD this time and lost my mind #i remember seeing news reports abt the filming of this and it was literally like #WILL OLDHAM SPOTTED IN STRANGE COSTUME WITH A DOZEN GREYHOUNDS #and he was. he was spotted there and here and everywhere even on the big four #anyway bring back the dancing boy the climate crisis is real #& THIS IS OLLIES TROLLEY

[bellshazes]

Richard was a stout-hearted man, he’d been through the bulk of his life He no longer spoke to most of his folks and was abandoned by his wife Rolling down the road one night alone, he came upon a terrible sight An older woman lay bleeding in the road and her screams about filled the night

She said: Look backwards on your future and look forward to your past Everything upon which you base your faith is made of vapour and it won’t last It’s only everything in our shared reality that keeps our souls held fast So, look backwards on your future and look forward to your past

Richard woke the next morning and spoke, he said, there’s something I feel I must do He called up all of his natural born kids and all his money from the bank he withdrew He changed his mind about everything he’d ever felt about what’s bad and good He fixed a loud-speaker to the roof of his car and he sang to everyone he could

do you think that richard the stout-hearted man from 'look backwards on your future look forward to your past' is any type of nod to richard cory. because in my mind they are the same man

#your sense of self vs. HYDROGEN BLAST #the answer truly is no bc yeah i do think miniver cheevy and richard cory are the same guy BUT if they were the same guy. #they would be THIS guy #ok i have 2 write my final paper in the next 1 hour BPB break over #SoundCloud

[bellshazes]

do you think that richard the stout-hearted man from 'look backwards on your future look forward to your past' is any type of nod to richard cory. because in my mind they are the same man

#peter posts #in fact they are wholly unalike and even totally opposed. but they represent the same thing to me #also i always conflate miniver cheevy & richard cory. so maybe that's it

[bellshazes]

to the discontinued features anon: i love u, i have the damnedest time finding my own posts so when i am less ill i will locate them for us both and ramble about it. if you see me rbing thigns in the mean time know i am percolating and rotating the concept in my brain as i convalesce

#peter posts #yes im a very dramatic sick person. my cat doesn't care when i tell him so i have to whine here #also semirelated but my boss is an insane digital literalist she does NOT comprehend that digital files are nondiscrete nonphysical objects #which can be truthfully “in” multiple places at once without duplication. and it's really inhibiting her opinion of my work. #which is managing a library. to be multiply visible. anyway. thank u <3

[bellshazes]

didn't etho say after last time he would have changed his skin if someone asked for mcc. Nows your fucking chance boys. Do it or else. matching ties or we riot

TIES mcc......

#mcc

[bellshazes]

TIES mcc......

[bellshazes]

I would be fixed if someone did this to my body ^

horrifying realization that if I am sick on Saturday morning I will absolutely drag my ass out at 7am to chase balloons if someone else drives. I feel like it's been years since the last time I landed one

#i took these 5 yrs ago wtf. wtf

[bellshazes]

horrifying realization that if I am sick on Saturday morning I will absolutely drag my ass out at 7am to chase balloons if someone else drives. I feel like it's been years since the last time I landed one

#i think we did like 2y ago. the shelby campus target landing year #whenever that was... we set up near the hare and landed a few stragglers

[bellshazes]

#it shoes that the man is conflicted like everyone else #and in private. they admit that #they also want to crack wise with some boss lesbians #*shows. whatever. rare genuine wisdom from ray tbqh #achewood

[bellshazes]

beau made me post this and i just want it to be out ofm y drafts so i never have to think abt it or look at it again. im sick email me never. but if you do thots below the cut

trying to think as i doze off but have been meditating on how actually etho is the guy who changed the most and bdubs has always been the exact same. in that ep he's trying to get etho to tell him what he hates abt his house & will do whatever he says but etho demures and is like it's fine it's nice sorry for ruining your episode. i think that. bdubs always offering himself up as something to push against + deep abiding admiration for etho even before etho did half the things he's beloved for today only SEEMS different.

and i think that in my universe of What Ifs, Back Then there's a moment where etho has a switch flip bc he's played off it and enjoys it a lot. but one day it clicks that oh bdubs means it like every time. and this means that he's not actually the timid one and he could have as much power in controlling the conversation/dynamic/whatever he wants. and it's just been like this for ages but now he Knows.

you know kind of like how last life makes him realize bdubs can be really devoted if allowed and is so hesitant to hurt/kill him unless it's for jokes later.

#nightmare webweave #i mean it. email me never. #one image in this is hte most telling and for those who know: please disregard. xoxo

[bellshazes]

reviewing my drafts and grimacing and closing my drafts

#peter posts

[bellshazes]

you ever think abt how when cleo went to bully etho in LL after helping bdubs with his stupid shitty enchanter thing bc he tells cleo that etho was kicking him out of the snow fort (untrue) etho's main defense against cleo is accusing her of metagaming after this awkward pause. never mind that bdubs was literally not telling the truth and etho is right about that when he tells cleo he wasn't trying to kick bdubs out bc he also is wrong when he claims bdubs is trying to kill him. but that episode he likes bdubs comment abt the enchanter trap that nearly killed etho and he'd never accused bdubs of metagaming. In fact he doesn't wither when bdubs in ltd life talks abt the dead weight comment, even tho he'd have to have watched etho or other ppls episode to know abt it and etho pretends it's natural gossip. and then has the balls to be like coulda been you and me bdubs like girl. girl. GIRL

#game shows do touch our lives #drafts cleaning #january me was on something.