benmzed

[benmzed]

He  appreciates  wit,  levity.  The  dour  nature  of  some  in  the  paths  he  walks  are  exhausting,  especially  since  he  trends  too  easily  towards  it  himself  if  given  enough  cause.  And,  for  the  first  time  in  a  long  time,  he’s  started  to  feel  like  he’s  got  some  kind  of  hope  again.  It’s  a  dim  light,  but  it’s  a  warm  one  — it’s  a  flicker  of  a  thing  that  reminds  him  just  enough  of  who  he  used  to  be  before  bitter  anger  and  guilt  became  all  he  knew.  

He  gives  a  flash  of  a  grin,  and  takes  the  piece  of  bread  as  offered.  He  rides  the  up-and-down  swell  of  the  ship  easily,  and  with  the  retreating  shoreline  of  the  coast  comes  an  ever-growing  sense  of  freedom.  "  This  expensive  pineapple  is  just  glad  to  be  free  of  that  place,  ship  and  rough  seas  or  no.  "  He  watches  him  for  a  moment  or  two,  eyes  contemplative,  and  then  shoves  off  the  railing.  "  Stay  there,  "  he  says,  without  explanation,  and  then  is  gone.  

He’s  gone  for  five,  ten  minutes  — not  long,  not  in  the  great  scheme  of  things.  From  the  hold  below,  he’s  brought  up  a  ginger  root:  not  large,  but  enough,  and  is  in  the  midst  of  slicing  a  thin  piece  off.  "  For  the  green  belly,  "  he  says  with  a  wink,  passing  it  down.  "  Chew  on  pieces  for  awhile.  It’ll  help.  "  

It's a far cry from freedom but it's better than being shackled, and Aksel doesn't miss that collar always making it's presence known at every turn. He wouldn't call their journey so far by any means lucky, but it's better than being kept a prisoner. Something, someone had to be looking out for him, otherwise he doubted he'd come across companions, Ifan being one of those. Hells, he's not the best at making conversation and he's in the habit of sticking his foot in it - a little too much of a jokester, sometimes playing the part of the fool, but Ifan has taken the light - hearted comment well. Thankfully.

" Then I guess I must call you expensive too. You are an expensive pineapple. " A sly smile rests on his lips as he pulls apart the bread to take a bite. " It is not meant as an insult, I am just bad at compliments. " He holds out the bread to the other man and adjusts his position a little - he won't admit to feeling a little sea sick but the way the boat crashes against the waves and sways with the wind on occasion does his stomach no favours. " I am happy to be resting my feet but I will be glad to get off this boat. "

#;; & mead and gold and blood. ( main v. ) #oathfcrged

[benmzed]

he's good with a sword but an excellent marksman; his preferred weapon is a crossbow, and while he can fight close quarters when he needs to, he's much more comfortable with some space and a bow. he's got a keen eye and can hit small targets from a distance.

he's also older now and in his lower 40s and close scraps are hard work when sleeping wrong has started to throw your back out sometimes

#;; & headcanons.

[benmzed]

#;; & a wolf isn't anything but what he is. ( images. ) #( AFRIT )

[benmzed]

the way so much of the text describes ifan's movement — he lopes, sidles, lounges, reclines. He's described as feral, wild, animalistic — yet keen, eyes glinting, pleased by wit and humor and quick to grin and wink and play with words.

he's tall, and per larian's description in the art book — daring. he's a little showy. wears a bit of gold and finery and has a finely crafted weapon. he wears his coat open with his chest bared as though daring those who would fight him to just try to strike him where he's vulnerable.

he's tall, but lean and rangy, strong. raw. described as constantly exuding a wild, intense energy. and yet to those he cares about he's painfully sweet and gentle. he is the wild wolf, the old wily wolf, the one that's been around the block a few times and is maybe got a few too many scars.

#;; & headcanons.

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The  kids  on  board  are  probably  the  worst  part.  Not  because  they’re  kids  — he’s  fine  with  kids,  he’s  not  bothered  by  the  noise  — but  because  he  sees  them  here,  bound  with  these  collars,  shoved  down  in  the  belly  of  this  ship  and  under  the  eye  of  those  same  Magisters  …  he’s  not  responsible  for  any  of  these  people  being  here,  not  these,  but  it’s  like  facing  the  reality  of  his  choices.  His  life.  His  ——

No.  Don’t  go  there.  

He’s  also  all  too  aware  that  one  of  the  Magisters  in  particular,  that  boy  he  knew  from  his  days  in  the  Order,  is  keeping  him  in  their  periphery  — it’s  none  too  subtle,  either.  "  Don’t  tease  a  man  that  way,  "  he  chides  with  a  tch  of  his  tongue,  though  it’s  with  a  little  sharp  exhale  of  a  laugh,  and  he  doesn’t  clarify  as  to  which  one  of  those  things  he  means.  Maybe  all  of  them.  Probably,  mostly,  the  mead,  because  by  the  Void  it’s  been  a  minute;  he  does  reach  a  hand  up  to  run  fingers  over  the  tangle  of  beard,  dark  streaked  with  grey.  "  Not  nice  at  all.  "  

There’s  an  acquiescence  without  really  saying  as  much  — though  the  Magister  sourly  clears  his  throat,  and  Ifan  gives  a  roll  of  his  eyes  and  leans  towards  her  to  confide,  a  bit  too  loud:  "  I  think  our  wardens,  "  and  boy,  that  word  has  a  wry  note  of  derision,  "  would  put  their  hands  in  most  of  those  before  they  got  interesting,  because  they  don’t  have  enough  interesting  in  their  lives  to  keep  'em  occupied.  Isn’t  that  so,  Vik?  "    He  gives  the  young  guard  a  little  grin  — wild  around  the  edges  — and  the  Magister  glowers  in  their  direction  and  then  turns  and  shuffles  off  on  a  routine  round.  "  There.  You  have  your  quiet.  As  much  as  you  get  on  a  place  like  this.  "

She didn't see him. Not that he's hiding, but he's keeping to himself, and given everything else going on, it's as close to becoming invisible as it gets whilst still being in plain sight. A kickball had hit her square in the back of the head and knocked her teeth together hard enough that her tongue, in the way, tasted of salt and iron, and she'd stormed here in a fury. Until she'd seen him - lounging, prowling, tense, a predator pretending to be in repose whilst fully aware if it pleased, it could and would rend her open belly to neck. Dangerous.

"Maybe I've got a stash of mead I'm tryin' to find a partner to share with," she says, deciding to make a game of his question, because she's a little too irritated to make small talk like a civilised person. "Maybe I'm askin' about how you grow a beard that impressive. Maybe no-one else in this shithole appeals to me to talk to." The thinnest sliver of a smile on her lips, a flirt she really doesn't intend to go anywhere at all, made just out of reflex to tease more than any real heat. "Maybe I'm lookin' to get a different kind of handsy. Hundreds of reasons, really."

Truth is, she just wants out of the noise and din, and this stranger is sitting in the quietest part of the hold near the storeroom. There's a bard playing with shrieking children, a dwarf with a belly-full of voice playing cards, the magisters make sport out of poking them, the crew shouts, the birds shriek, the whole ship creaks and groans, and she's at her wits end. Breina has had enough.

"Unclench. I just wanna sit here away from the kids, alright?"

#;; & mead and gold and blood. ( main v. ) #deathswcrn #( i mean understandably LOL )

[benmzed]

this man is intense, and yet so soft and i CRY

#;; & let sleeping wolves lie. ( ooc. )

[benmzed]

carrd up and linked !! still needs a lot of stuff filled in but bio and info and stuff has been done for reference.

#;; & let sleeping wolves lie. ( ooc. ) #( i have almost a whole blog now )

[benmzed]

as a reminder, ifan is not exactly the noble assassin or mercenary with a heart of gold trope. at this point in his life — he has boundaries, but he's done some awful things. he's been a killer for hire. he's done mercenary gigs that involved rounding up sourcerers (magic users) for the lone wolves.

he's never been proud of it. he's full of guilt. he blames himself for everything, and he hates himself a little more every job he takes, but he's also so stuck in the lone wolves mindset. he's stuck with this bitter need for revenge and vengeance and, in a way, punishing himself for lucian's betrayal.

it isn't until he starts along this journey and starts seeing behind the scenes that he truly starts on a real path of redemption, and the first step of that is letting go of this need for revenge and taking a step towards letting go of his past.

for bg3 verses, I see this point as possibly being driven by the tadpoled crew — a view into the situation being a great deal more complex than he initially thought. he's a man who has been looking for purpose for a long, long time.

#;; & headcanons. #( he's still a cinnamon roll tho #a kind of murdery cinnamon roll #but a soft spicy cinnamon roll all the same )

[benmzed]

" i'm not going to hurt you. how close do i have to get without splitting you open to make you believe that? " @deathswcrn / the serpent & the wing of night

Keep  your  head  down.  That’s  been  what  he’s  told  himself  again  and  again  since  he  was  shackled,  collared,  shoved  into  these  stinking  quarters.  He’s  lost  track  of  how  long  precisely  they’ve  even  been  aboard  the  ship  — he  was  tracking  it  with  marks  scratched  with  a  nail  into  the  floor  under  his  bedroll,  but  then  it  became  increasingly  pointless.  Keep  your  head  down,  don’t  get  involved.  

Keep  an  eye  forward.  Survive.  Survive  until  Fort  Joy,  and  then  he  can  get  things  set  into  motion.  

Even  in  these  rags,  he  still  manages  to  exude  contained,  animalistic  energy,  tireless  and  prowling  — even  when  he’s  just  lounged  against  the  wall,  casual  as  one  pleases,  avoiding  every  scrap  of  conflict  even  when  he  plainly  looks  like  he’s  dangerous  in  a  scrap.  Most  have  given  up  trying  to  pry  into  him,  which  suits  him  fine.  Most,  that  is,  except  ——

Green  eyes  slip  over,  and  there’s  the  scarcest  flash  of  a  little  smile.  "  Ah,  but  for  all  I  know,  you’re  planning  on  getting  close  just  to  split  me  open.  "  By  the  way  his  eyes  dance,  just  a  little  — an  immutable  spark  that  even  these  damnable  collars  can’t  stifle  — it’s  not  an  actual  concern.  "  So  if  not  that,  then  what  is  it?  "  

#;; & mead and gold and blood. ( main v. ) #deathswcrn

[benmzed]

let's all get into divinity 2 so i can brag about my honour mode run

#;; & a wolf isn't anything but what he is. ( images. ) #( this art is so gorgeous help )

[benmzed]

the reality that ifan's surname, ben-mzed, just literally means son of the desert because he was found as a baby in a raided caravan in the mzed desert and none of the elves knew his name so they literally just named him desert-son.

#meta commentary tbt.

[benmzed]

this is a long chunk of text, but I have to leave this here because you ONLY get this when playing as origin and it gives such a look into his history and thoughts and just where he is at this moment in time

he blames himself for so much

#meta commentary tbt. #( I just #UGH )

[benmzed]

" you're sweet. prickly, but sweet. in an acidic sort of way. like a pineapple. " ( divinity verse! ) @oathfcrged / the serpent & the wing of night

It’s  been  a  long  time  since  someone  has  called  him  sweet,  and  there’s  a  flash  of  green  eyes  up  and  over;  there’s  a  wrinkle  at  the  corners,  a  dancing  in  their  depths.  "  Oh,  I  don’t  know  about  that,  "  rumbles  he,  passing  along  the  ale  they  retrieved  from  the  hold.  The  Lady  Vengeance  rolls  underfoot,  waves  lapping  against  the  hull  — when  last  they  were  on  a  boat,  they  had  been  in  shackles  and  chains  and  collared  and  dampened,  but  now  the  swell  of  the  ocean  underfoot  feels  like  —— feels  not  like  freedom,  not  really,  for  they  still  have  the  grip  of  a  god  'round  their  necks,  but  freedom  enough.  

"  Where  I  was  from,  a  pineapple  cost  more  coin  than  a  decent  sword.  "  He  was  of  the  Mezd  desert,  orphaned  and  raised  by  those  elves  who  found  him:  even  when  taken  to  the  elven  refuge,  they  were  still  far,  far  away  from  such  unusual  and  imported  goods.  "    Expensive,  prickly,  acidic,  sometimes  sweet.  "  He  laughs,  then,  a  deep  and  even  pleased  sound,  in  his  own  way;  he  admits  with  some  rue:    "  I’ve  been  called  worse  in  my  day.  "

#;; & mead and gold and blood. ( main v. ) #oathfcrged #( me not having made ...anything yet KJFDSF #temp tags it is )

[benmzed]

𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑺𝑬𝑹𝑷𝑬𝑵𝑻 & 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑾𝑰𝑵𝑮𝑺 𝑶𝑭 𝑵𝑰𝑮𝑯𝑻. 🐍

quotes from the first book of carissa broadbent's crown of nyaxia series . might be spoilery but i didn't include names . tw for cursing , death , suggestive content . for all your vampire , enemy ( to lovers ) & reluctant allies dynamics . * feel free to change roles , pronouns .

𝙸. 𝙳𝚄𝚂𝙺.

" don't look away. " " this place is a fucking disaster. " " never guessed you were pretty under all of that. " " i take no criticism from a drowned rat like you. " " which reminds me, i have something for you. " " made me think of you. " " it's a good color for you. " " youth is wasted on the young. beauty, too. " " you're sweet. prickly, but sweet. in an acidic sort of way. like a pineapple. " " i'm tired. tired of being afraid. " " crazy old bitch. " " don't drink yourself to death. " " you're dead here. try again. "

𝙸𝙸. 𝙵𝚄𝙻𝙻 𝙼𝙾𝙾𝙽.

" you are prey in a world of predators. " " may the Mother guide you. " " i was trying to save your life. " " i'm not a fool. " " are you deaf, or just stupid? " " you're unfriendly. " " ally with me. " " top of the eastern tower. if you change your mind. " " you'll be easy to kill later. "

𝙸𝙸𝙸. 𝚆𝙰𝙽𝙸𝙽𝙶 𝙼𝙾𝙾𝙽.

" a gift from a goddess. " " i have a gift for you. " " you're a demanding little thing, aren't you? " " becasue i'm nice and pretty. " " OPEN. THIS. FUCKING. DOOR. " " remember right now exactly how lucky you are. " " i feel sorry for her. " " that was a foolish decision. " " i taught you better. " " i would have been there, if i could. " " keep those teeth ready, little serpent. " " watch their back, but don't let them see yours. " " use him. but never allow him to use you. " " what in the seven fucking hells is wrong with you? " " we can't cooporate if you won't let me get close to you. " " i won't even dignify that with a response. " " you're working against me, not with me. " " you are afraid of me. " " i'm not going to hurt you. how close do i have to get without splitting you open to make you believe that? " " i don't know how i ever thought this was gonna work. " " don't let them take her. "

𝙸𝚅. 𝙷𝙰𝙻𝙵 𝙼𝙾𝙾𝙽.

" you're many things. but a good actress is not one of them. " " we're losing moonlight. " " don't you worry about me. " " get the fuck away from her. " " i'll be back. don't burn to death. " " i called and called but he wouldn't answer. " " we're surrounded by those who would like to see us dead. " " don't forget those teeth of yours. you will need them. " " daughter of the moon. welcome. " " i'm sorry for what i'm about to do to you. " " i'm glad your bedside manner is about as delicate as i would have expected. " " too late for that. you're stuck with me. " " did you miss me? " " i'm coming for you. " " you worried me. i should have known better. "

𝚅. 𝙲𝚁𝙴𝚂𝙲𝙴𝙽𝚃 𝙼𝙾𝙾𝙽.

" return to the church at sundown. " " you were fucking magnificent. " " something bothers you. " " a dance? " " one more dance. " " give me one honest thing. " " are you going to kill me? " " you might destroy me anyway. " " that wasn't how i'd imagined making you come for the first time. " " you seem to be good at winning the hearts of ill-tempered creatures. " " we have enough if we ration. " " it finally happened. you've lost your mind. " " after everything, you're still afraid of me? " " i'm not a fucking animal. " " didn't think i'd see you again. " " you said it yourself. you don't have a choice. " " you can still say no. " " don't do anything stupid. " " we need to run right now. "

𝚅𝙸. 𝙽𝙴𝚆 𝙼𝙾𝙾𝙽.

" you look them in the eye. " " i gave you everything. i made you all that you are. " " don't look at me that way. " " kiss me. " " we'll probably die tomorrow. " " show me something worth living for. " " i've done a lot of thinking about you. " " i would beg, for you, i would. " " you have fucking destroyed me. " " there she is. " " give me a fair fight and i'll give you a fair death. " " i'm glad it was you. " " end it. " " i know what it is to lose half of one's soul. " " so many mistakes in the end. never you. " " you're safe. "

𝚅𝙸𝙸. 𝙽𝙸𝙶𝙷𝚃.

" i was ready to let it all go for you. " " that is the stupidest plan i have ever heard. " " we will find the answers. " " everything looks so much more peaceful now, doesn't it? " " power is a bloody business. " " and there is no one i would rather have beside me. " " i give you my body. i give you my blood. i give you my soul. " " i'd like to be alone. " " you look like shit. " " better this than dead. " " what's the plan? " " you can find me when you need me. "

#;; & memes. #( things ! )

[benmzed]

honestly, for baldur's gate 3 / dnd, it's fairly easy to tweak — his background is still the same: he was an orphaned human raised by elves. felt a calling to right injustices and swore to the paladins. raised in rank, was a good soldier, loyal and faithful, on the front lines to a war against a mercenary devil-sworn faction.

he was betrayed, tricked by his leader with a task that was framed as saving people, but ended up killing a number of innocents. his name was sullied.

the paladin known as ifan ben-mzed he vanished, likely presumed dead. a number of years later, a mercenary assassin only known as the Silver Claw gained notoriety — someone with a vague sense of honor despite the truth that the right amount of coin could buy almost anything.

he's a ranger, now, accompanied only by a massive grey wolf and carrying a heavy and shadow-infused crossbow. he's lean, scarred, a little feral — but there's something that dances in those green eyes that suggests something far beyond the cold brutality his name has become known for.

for baldur's gate verse: perhaps he's been tasked with killing gortash ( or any other high-ranking nobility of baldur's gate, really ) and he runs across the party.

#ooc tag tba.

[benmzed]

Successfully accomplished “In search of perfect gouache paper” quest. So here is a little Ifan portrait as result

#;; & a wolf isn't anything but what he is. ( images. )

[benmzed]

—— #BENMZED.  by  rowan  (  30+,  she/her)  [ CARRD ] independent  and  selective  canon  portrayal  of  IFAN  BEN-MZED  of  larian's  divinity:  original  sin  2.  iconless. verse  flexible  (  baldur's  gate  3,  general  fantasy,  game  of  thrones,  wheel  of  time,  etc  ).

ex-paladin  turned  mercenary  assassin.  silver claw of the lone wolves. wayfarer.  ranger.  sourcerer.  godwoken but never divine.  a  study  in:  being  used  as  a  weapon,  guilt,  self-destruction,  redemption.

general warnings: addiction ( fantasy substance: drudanae ). canon-typical violence.

#pinned post.