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Semester 1

So as always, going to a new place and meeting new people are scary. The school surprised me w its ugly and old infrastructure- I SWEAR. what can i say it is an old school anyway and the seniors have been warning us. It also surprises me on how religious the people seemed to be. I wore hijab the first time too (just saying) but i took it off after orientation week. My roommate was okay, she was nice, not too friendly or unfriendly. I had fun during the orientation week and i remember sem 1 being all fun and games. Even our CAS activity, nervewrecking TOK classes were all sweet memories to me now. I love our sem 1 CAS activity because one of the kids likes me a lot. Who doesn’t want to feel loved right? I look forward to seeing Ammar every week! He was a stubby child, dark skinned and wears this tough expression always. He’s like a copy of my little brother when he was fat and small- Probably that was why i loved him so much lmao. However, Sem 1 didn’t went by that smoothly. I frequent my sister’s house quite often. I was ill quite often too. I don’t like to blame anyone but i have an issue with my always sick roommate. My immune system isn’t that great to fight off the virus when we’re always 1m between each other in the room. My body literally gave up on me during the final exam. It was during the study week, I had to go back to my sister’s house because i was super sick. I thought it was regular fever but my trouble sleeping didn’t do any justice for me to get better. I still remember that feeling, i just wished to faint so i don’t have to deal w it anymore and get admitted or something. I toughened up and went back home in hope i would heal. Which i did not. I have no choice but to go back to college for the exams. English i remember was the first day and i was feeling terrible. I didn’t get to study properly when all i did at home was lie down in bed after taking my meds. I was shivering due to the cold and my throbbing headache makes me extremely uncomfortable. Sitting for 2 hours makes me want to cry. In fact, I cried everyday because of that. Calling my mom to complain about it didn’t really helped but she was the only one who understood that my body is weak. I was afraid that i wouldn’t do good and it was absolutely right. I used to get good marks on standardised tests so i was really aiming for the deans during semesters. Unfortunately the stars didn’t aligned for that to happen. I was actually thankful to some people though, they helped me through those sick days such as bringing me food to my room, and my sister for caring for me back home. I know it is so troublesome to come get me who lives 1 hour away every weekend. I couldn’t thank everyone enough for those things. Sem 1 ended w me happily going back to kuching for semester break :D

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2020

I would like to start this longass post by making it clear that i totally forgot i made a blog especially for my IB journey. However, life proved that i was too busy to be doing any of this shit- or lazy even. I will start by grouping all of my experiences by semester to prevent myself from jumping from one memory to another. Anyways, IB has ended for like a month now? Our finals were cancelled due to the pandemic that is taking over the world right now. It is cool though, luckily my results were never bad, so i can probably rest assured. However i am still worried because i halfassed most of my assignments. So here goes nothing !

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One month before reg

I am filling up forms. Doing medical check up, going to court, signing forms, printing out forms, and everything you’d expect you’d do for a scholarship. I am a bit stressed thinking about some informations that i might get wrong, but on the bright side, i am pretty calm when i thought of learning as an IB student. Hope that’s a good sign and my panic attacks wont be making any appearance in my journey. I am also buying stuff and second-checking stuff i already have. I am looking forward to going back to school again !